3 year old starting nursery struggling with toilet training

[Witchesbelazy]

Hello
Ds is 3. Meant to be starting nursery in just over a week it’s attached to a school and obviously run different to private ones as it has a uniform etc. He can wee on the toilet (still struggling with poos) but is really struggling with the transition to pants since we’ve been trying pants he’s wee’d him self twice in two days in the pants but without them will use the toilet fine for a wee. I’m really worried they won’t accept him . I’m trying my best but time is running out now.
Any tips or advice please ?
Thanks

My daughter was the same age and went to a nursery in a similar situation. Could use the toilet but refused to poop on one choosing to go in her pants.... No matter what we did. Sometimes she'd have wee accidents. She understood the toilet, knew when she needed to go but thought doing it in her knickers was funny. I spoke to them and explained and sent spare clothes in. She went three days a week. For the first week there was an accident everyday. The last day of the second week she did a ginormous poop accident, that bad they called us to collect her as she needed a shower.

She has NEVER had an accident since and pooped in the toilet from that day on.

What do you mean he's struggling with pants? Was he wearing pull-ups before or just going pants free?

There will be lots of others not fully toilet trained don't worry.

And nursery cannot reuse a child on these grounds.

@NuffSaidSam

What do you mean he's struggling with pants? Was he wearing pull-ups before or just going pants free?

I was also going to ask this.

A government run nursery will not refuse to accept a child who is not toilet trained.
If they are a private school then they can make their own rules.

It’s not a private school it’s just a standard primary school it’s attached to.
He was wearing pull ups when out of nothing at home as he just keeps taking his clothes off when at home. He’s just came into my room did a wee on the floor and laughed though so I think it maybe is deliberate sometimes as he hadn’t had a wee accident in weeks, he does sometimes think his pants are a nappy though I think

He’s just came into my room did a wee on the floor and laughed

How did you react to this behaviour? Did you say or do anything, or just let him walk away?

'he does sometimes think his pants are a nappy though I think'

This is very common. What's the uniform like? Could he wear it without pants. At home in this situation I would put them in loose joggers so they're covered but don't have the tight feeling of a nappy round them.

Otherwise just take him to the toilet at regular intervals so he doesn't have a change to wet himself. And tell school he'll need reminding to go.

@Whinge

He’s just came into my room did a wee on the floor and laughed

How did you react to this behaviour? Did you say or do anything, or just let him walk away?

I told him to remember to use the toilet and then just cleaned it up the toilet is on the same floor and we were on the hallway so he chose to go in to do it there rather than the toilet.

Thanks for the help

@NuffSaidSam

'he does sometimes think his pants are a nappy though I think'

This is very common. What's the uniform like? Could he wear it without pants. At home in this situation I would put them in loose joggers so they're covered but don't have the tight feeling of a nappy round them.

Otherwise just take him to the toilet at regular intervals so he doesn't have a change to wet himself. And tell school he'll need reminding to go.

It’s polo , trousers , jumper same as the older kids but there is a choice to wear joggers I got trousers but think maybe I should get some joggers

GM insisted we toilet train DD1 before nursery but actually there were plenty of kids who needed a diaper change at school.

Best advice is to take off all clothes! (Dresses are the best for this time actually so they cover the child a little bit) kids get used to going bathroom in whatever they're wearing so training pants don't work at all

If he's still not toilet trained, get some pull ups. It'll be much easier for him and for the person changing him at school.

@grey12

GM insisted we toilet train DD1 before nursery but actually there were plenty of kids who needed a diaper change at school.

Best advice is to take off all clothes! (Dresses are the best for this time actually so they cover the child a little bit) kids get used to going bathroom in whatever they're wearing so training pants don't work at all

If he's still not toilet trained, get some pull ups. It'll be much easier for him and for the person changing him at school.

He is usually fine when not wearing anything he will use it no problem other than poo issues. But for a wee without clothes he’s fine it’s just recently trying to make the transition to wearing clothes he seems to be going backwards

Humm DD1 was a bit like that. When she was at home she would wear just a dress and when we were about than it was a pull up diaper. Didn't take long for her to start asking consistently for the bathroom but she couldn't wait at all! We had to RUN to find a place to pee. Still struggles a little more than DD2, at night as well

Like I said, nursery is fine. They had to clean her just a handful of times. When I went there, there was always someone changing diapers to another kid.