Hi All!
I'm a single working parent of a now 11 year old who has just started secondary school. My ex husband and his family live abroad and isn't very involved (his choice since the divorce 7 years ago). My own family are a 5 hour drive away.
About a year ago, I went back to full-time work and was looking for a childminder to do the school runs (to and from) as well as some wrap around care for my then 10 year old child. A fellow Mum friend of mine recommended her (good) friend - a qualified childminder looking for work - who also happened to live across from me having recently moved from Greece along with her husband and son - the convenience!
I contacted the childminder and after meeting, getting on well, introducing my daughter, we did a practice run of the route and school pick up, introduction to the teacher etc. Also discussed payment (she wanted it all in cash in advance each week). I have kept a thorough record with her signing off on all payments also. She showed me her childcare qualifications and work references (including a day nursery nearby). When I asked if she was a registered childminder here, she told me she was, having worked in a renowned day nursery also here, but that there was a delay in getting her number due to backlog caused by Covid-19 - she assured me she would keep contacting/chasing it up and let me know asap after I stressed that I would be entitled to part of my childcare costs with a registered minder. Months passed and yet every time I followed top on the number, she would always have some excuse for the ongoing delay. Meanwhile, we would exchange birthday and Christmas presents for the children and I have sent her various gifts as thank you, wine, flowers, that sort of thing.
Eventually, I went to try to claim back the expenses for that school year, submitting a letter containing the full information, dates, payment and so on, which was signed by the childminder - letter was rejected - they only wanted the registration number. A month or so before starting secondary school, I contacted the same childminder about only doing the morning drop offs and she told me she couldn't manage it due to her new childminding job start time (didn't say what time it started at, but I know she leaves the house around 8.30am in her car to drop off her son at his school, which coincidentally is on the way to my daughters new one) I was flexible with her drop off time - there's an earlier breakfast club in place, yet she still insisted she couldn't manage it. It left me in a tricky position, but I've managed to do it all and back before 9am - so far! The idea is she can start walking herself there and back with a group of friends nearby and I'm helping to build them up to it with some other parents. I messaged her again a few days ago offering to help chase it all up and she just replied, Sorry but we had a private arrangement from the start, blatantly implying that I was fine with never needing to know the number! Definitely in contrast what was really communicated and everything since!
Now, she's completely ignoring me. A friend dropped me off yesterday in her car and we were sitting just opposite the childminder's house - she came out and actually kept her head down avoiding all contact while getting into her car parked directly next to where we were. My friend noticed and thought it was bizarre. I searched online for the list of registered childminders in our area and she wasn't on it. I also contacted Ofsted and they couldn't confirm either - they keep asking me to give them her address so they can 'investigate' - but I am reluctant...what if it all becomes more trouble than it's worth? So the question is - what is going on and what should I do? It's a lot of money for me to just lose! I'm quite shocked at this sudden personality change also. Any advice on what to do?
Is she Registered or Unregistered?