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Should I complain. Don't know what to do

2 replies

nosafeguardingadults · 01/09/2021 03:58

Frightened and exhausted. Feel so desperate to get through this thought I'd be safe by now. Can't do this alone without professional. Tried hard but impossible and now so broken by trying on my own,vso frightened, feel desperate for emotionsl support when going through fight to be safe.

Called local domestic abuse support service. Website says they offer advocacy and casework support. Waiting list is open in my area. I called two weeks ago. They sounded nice took my number. Called back 20 minutes later to say waiting list was closed in my area. They said website not updated. Two weeks later it's still saying my area list is open. I felt so shocked and upset, I called and got different person who answered. I gave fake name and was told was open to take me on. I had to hang up was so upset and feel more vulnerable cos places meant to help are doing that to me. Refusing to help, lying. Feel physically sick from stress been months trying to get help.

Don't know if should complain. Been through so much can't take much more. The violence and abuse but also had horrible time trying to get help and places lying or turning me away. Housing departments breaking the law think taking advantage of my vulnerability and no one supporting me. Social services in my area also breaking law. So overwhelmed exhausted. So many years living in fear with violence awful fear and risk and control but now being broken more by places meant to help not helping.

Feel at my limit and sick of places doing this.

OP posts:
nosafeguardingadults · 01/09/2021 04:25

Torturing myself about bad experiences with trying to get help. Going round and round in my head. Lost out on chances to be safe and struggling to deal with feeling so let down and vulnerable and alone. They making me feel like either they don't believe me but I have evidence or maybe they believe me but think I'm not deserving of help for some reason. Feel dirty and violated and humiliated. Telling these people what's happened, the violence and other abuse and they not caring not doing their job. Feel why me. They offer help to people other people. Counselling as well. I feel so desperate for help and to be safe. Why don't I deserve it. It's all a neverending nightmare want it to go away but feel more vulnerable when experiences like that place.

Feel more dirty especially cos she said they have space for sexual violence victims. Website says any form of sexual violence. I've experienced rape and other stuff in the relationship but she said I couldn't be taken on for support by them cos my main problem was domestic violence. Then she lied about the domestic violence support being closed in my area. Feel sick cos how can they behave like that not helping leaving you at risk of being killed all the fear. Leaving you with no support.

Want to complain cos bad behaviour and maybe not just happening to me and feel like had enough of places getting away with it. Been let down other bad experiences with other places and had been injured several times after when first asked for help and wasn't helped.

Maybe too dangerous to complain if still at risk but feels like doesn't matter anymore.

OP posts:
ApolloandDaphne · 01/09/2021 07:25

Is it possible that they reopened the case list in that two weeks? Why didn't you call back as yourself and ask them again to take you on? Do you believe there is something about you and your circumstances they are against? What is it that social services have done that you believe to be wrong?

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