Can't motivate myself to do anything at all!

[leavesthataregreen]

Not sure where to post this. Hope it's OK in chat.

It's been a very rough year. Lots of Covid and lockdown related stresses - cancelled work contracts, lots of cancelled plans, DC severely effected by isolation and loneliness, then my dad was very ill and in a hospital that allowed him no visitors for months. Eventually he died and I was responsible for sorting out his funeral, his effects and caring for my mum. So, tough but no more than anyone else has had it.

But now, I just can't motivate myself to do anything. I don't feel depressed. I just can't get started. I work for myself, from home and work is piling up. Housework is piling up. Laundry is piling up. Even nice things that I'd like to do are piling up. I just have coffee and then sit on the sofa and get lost online all day for days on end.

How do I break this cycle? (aware of the irony that I am online asking this )

Has anyone felt similar and managed to reboot themselves and get productive and motivated?

Oh no problem @Leftbutcameback. I wouldn't have thought of it, but she became very fixated on having an address book and asking if she could write to me, then suddenly explained being able to reread the letters and it made sense. Just posted the letter to her and watched a couple of mini lectures from the online course I'm studying. Feeling a bit better for having actually completed two things today.

I was feeling like this a few weeks ago (burnout, for me). I found setting myself one small task an hour and then giving myself permission to just sit was helpful e.g. put the washing on (nothing too taxing). After a few days I found I was naturally a bit more active and spending less time sat down. It's key to be gentle with yourself, I think.

I frequently have this problem when I'm feeling emotional and physical stress or burn out (or both!) I have two strategies:

Strategy one is to make a to-do list of no more than three items on it. On a good day, I'll then write another three and carry on, on a bad one I'll do the three and be glad I've got something done and try again later.

Strategy 2 is using a timer. I set a time that seems managble (often 20 or 30 minutes) and crack on. At the end, I give myself the same option to carry on or stop.

For both I always put the radio on (alternatively podcast, audiobook etc.) Go easy on yourself

@leavesthataregreen
Oh yes. The Victorian invalid. Where’s our beef tea? I always think I would have perished if I’d been a real victorian though not made of strong enough stuff.
But I agree. I think we all just go on and on coping and dealing with stuff, endless stuff material and emotional. And sometimes it’s just all too much. Give yourself permission to take a break. It’s ok. Really hard to do.
Ps What are you reading? Im working my way through Elly Griffiths Ruth Galloway novels. They are like a warm bath.

This sounds trite OP but it helps me when things seem bleak and I can’t get going. There is a quote from Shawshank Redemption “get busy living or get busy dying” one of the characters says when he has lost all hope and decides to move forward.
I say it to myself and just get on and put the radio on for company make a short list of jobs that need doing and tick them off. Give myself a coffee break and a scroll and then do some more of the list.
I also go for a walk just a short one but it always enlivens me 20 mins tops.
However if you really can’t make your mind do it then be kind and just accept it needs some time to heal. Burn out is a real thing and maybe you need to nurture yourself and give yourself permission to do nothing? Can you get signed off for a few weeks and genuinely just rest?
Just a few ideas and some low dose anti D’s won’t necessarily be adverse some are better than others and don’t make you feel a zombie.

Thank you all. Soe lovely support and good suggestions there. I was going to write a three things only list this morning and try to stick to it - but I never even got around to writing the list. That's how pathetic I feel right now, Maybe I should just accept that I can't do anything right now and stop feeling guilty and anxious about it but just rest for a few days totally.

Yes, total rest is sometimes what is needed[and dont feel guilty because it sounds very much like you need it].

If you do end up needing pills for depression, they have various sorts.
Years ago, I had to have them for a short period of time, and I had to be given 3 different sorts, before finding one that suited me.

This is so me and I can add in procrastinator to the mix. Every weekend I am full of good intentions and I do not lie in. I get up make a cuppa, start browsing the net, an hour gone then another cuppa and I go in to a downward spiral of cannot be bothered and end up doing nothing.
I have been meaning to look for cheaper broadband for 9 months and every week this will be the week and when the time comes I say 'next week' to myself. Same with other admin.
I keep meaning to tidy as I go along, but end up leaving it until it needs blitzing. So many diy jobs on the house to do, craft activities and books to read. I wish I could change my ways.