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Original poster

Parental responsibility

18 replies

6fingerkitkat · 22/08/2021 20:39

Would you permit your exH new wife's application for parental responsibility?

Both bio parents alive. Custody informally arranged as 60:40 in favour of mother.

Not in anyway a step parent bash!

OP posts:

PumpkinKlNG · 22/08/2021 20:52

Hekatestorch · 22/08/2021 20:54

What are the reasons the new wife wants it? Or the ex wants it fir the new wife?

How's the relationship between them all.

My gut says no. But I can imagine some situations, where it may benefit everyone.

girlmom21 · 22/08/2021 20:56

How long have they been together, how much input does she have in their lives and why does she want it?

Will it benefit your children for her to have PR? Will she ever need to take them to the doctors, attend meetings at school etc?

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Family law

Pebbledashery · 22/08/2021 20:57

No. Definitely not. Only way she'd get parental responsibility is it the dc's mum passed away or walked out on their child.. It's a massive overstep to have parental responsibility if both parents are alive and active in the childrens lives.

YouCantBeSadHoldingACupcake · 22/08/2021 20:57

Not in this situation. They have the dc less than half the time, both bio parents still alive. It seems unnecessary. Plus what happens if they divorce.

ineedaholidaynow · 22/08/2021 20:58

What is the reasoning?

Iveputmyselfonthenaughtystep · 22/08/2021 20:59

Nope

DontBeAHaterDear · 22/08/2021 20:59

No, I wouldn’t. The children has 2 parents already who they have almost equal contact with (in your case) so wouldn’t see the need. If my ex had a partner who wanted this I’d say definitely not as I would assume it was in some way to gain more control somehow.

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 22/08/2021 21:01

No because it seems unnecessary? Unless there was a v good reason, perhaps dad works away a lot and kids stay with sm somewhere which is far away from mum? Seems unlikely

TrainspottingWelsh · 22/08/2021 21:06

I have it for dsd, but her mother isn't involved so a completely different scenario. With hindsight it would have made things easier if I'd had it when her mother was officially still parenting on paper but not in reality.

I can only imagine it being beneficial in your scenario in specific circumstances. Eg dc with a medical condition and step mum needing to sign in an emergency.

Original poster

6fingerkitkat · 22/08/2021 21:59

Thank you. It's not been requested yet, I guess I was wondering about it coming up.

Im working on myself extensively but I'm a pleaser by default, so easily railroaded and tend to agree to things though getting better. ExH is controlling and difficult if he doesn't get his way...

It's good to get a view from others... I won't be agreeing having heard alternative views.

I've often thought extra adults in the kids lives is a good thing- related to my MH issues and because neither him or I have any extended family, emergency contacts/ friends etc to help so I can see both sides.

OP posts:

Terminallysleepdeprived · 22/08/2021 22:02

I was with ex for 7 years and never had or wanted pr for his older kids. They have their parents. I was and am capable of being an influential adult in their lives without removing pr from their parents.

It is a huge over step and I can't imagine there would be many situations were both bio parents are alive and well where a court would grant it

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 22/08/2021 22:04

I agree extra people can be positive, of course they can, but as a sm, I don't think pr is required to be able to be a positive part of DC's life.

Hekatestorch · 22/08/2021 22:04

@6fingerkitkat

Thank you. It's not been requested yet, I guess I was wondering about it coming up.

Im working on myself extensively but I'm a pleaser by default, so easily railroaded and tend to agree to things though getting better. ExH is controlling and difficult if he doesn't get his way...

It's good to get a view from others... I won't be agreeing having heard alternative views.

Based on exh being controlling and difficult, it would be a hard No.

gogohm · 22/08/2021 22:06

Depends on circumstances, in some cases it might be useful but generally it's unnecessary.

Theunamedcat · 22/08/2021 22:08

No and they need your permission to do it as an upside though if they divorce she can be forced to pay child support according to child maintenance services my ex husband had it for my daughter (bio dad not interested) and after we split they said I could claim for all three children I didnt but apparently I could have

ineedaholidaynow · 22/08/2021 22:10

Is there a reason you don't have friends?

Original poster

6fingerkitkat · 22/08/2021 22:20

@ineedaholidaynow

Is there a reason you don't have friends?

I have some nice friends but none that I could call on to help with my kids. My kids don't know them at all.

It's my doing / issue. Since I left him (due to his arsehole ness!) I've become very self sufficient in a way you have to as a single parent. I've taken it too far I think unfortunately. MH hasn't helped.

I don't have a next of kin either which is always a challenge at clinic appointments!

OP posts:

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