Argh! Have I ruined my toddler?

[WhereTheFuck]

I'll start by saying I am not in the UK, so it's early afternoon here.

My DD will be 2 in October and she coslept with me for nighttime and naps up until quite recently. However, I used a gentle sleep training method which worked really well, and she has been sleeping through the night from about 8 until 4 or 5, then coming into my bed until about 6.30, for about 2 months now. She also usually has a nap of about 1 and a half to 2 hours from about 12 until 2. So far so good.,until today when she literally REFUSED to go in her cot for her nap despite being really tired! I still breastfeed her before bed and before naps, and today she just kept crying for more and more milk every time I put her in her cot 😩 after over an hour of this I have given up and she is now lying next to me on my bed, fast asleep. But now I feel like I have failed :( will this mean that she will never sleep in her cot again now? How should I handle this if it happens again? Really worried that I've put myself back to square one :(

You haven't ruined her. It's one time. It will be a phase. She might be transitioning out of needing a nap 😬

Just sounds like a bad day/night.

Stop beating up on yourself!

My DS is also 2 in October and yesterday it took me HOURS to convince him to nap. It was half 2 by the time he gave in. I think it's just a stubborn age and you haven't ruined anything. Just keep trying.

Thanks for the support. Just unsure what to do really when she is getting hysterical and standing up in her cot. Should I just have left her? I was in the room with her, repeating 'sleepy time darling' 'mummy's here'but it just didn't work

I'd say that's a blip. Had she been less active than usual that morning? Fresh air and exercise usually helps.
Sometimes they just want to fight naps even when they're tired. With dc1 I'd bundle her into the pram or car and get her off that way when she fought them.

With dc2 I can't do that bc dc1 doesn't fancy impromptu walks or car rides! Have you tried telling a story? Get her to lie down and make something up about something she likes that's very repetitive, like listing all the characters in her favourite book and their colours etc. I tell dc2 about a tractor going round the bend, over the hill, down a lane etc in a slow voice and he usually drops off.

No, she hadn't been less active - she went to the park.with her dad this morning and ran around a lot apparently. (We are separated). She did fall asleep in the buggy on the way home but apparently it was only for about 10 mins - could this have messed up her sleeping pattern somehow?

It could be a blip or a leap or having a normal reaction to her circumstances I'd say. I'd want to be close to you too having been with Dad earlier and all the big feelings she's starting to have. I've never met an adult who sleeps with their mum. You'll be fine! You didn't do anything wrong comforting her.