Sense check?

[Platypodes]

Can someone please give me a sense check? I’ve been poorly for a few days and I’m lying in bed while DC plays on the floor. DH has been outside painting the fence since 11am. He’s come in at 4pm and started shouting at me because he hasn’t had any lunch. Calling me lazy and saying I do nothing. Apparently I should have made him a sandwich and brought it outside because he was busy working while I sit on my arse. I have given DC some lunch but I was tired and in pain so didn’t make anything for myself and it didn’t even occur to me to make anything for DH. I don’t know if he’s being a twat or if I am lazy and useless.

Really? For starters, if he were that hungry surely he'd have downed tools and asked for a sandwich or made one himself?

He said he couldn’t come in the house mid job to make his own lunch because he was dirty. So I should have made some lunch and taken it out.

I don’t know if he’s being a twat

If you really don't know I would suggest LTB and never date again. You sound hugely vulnerable.

That is twatty behaviour from him. Hopefully a blip caused by him being hangry.

He did text me and say “I could do with a sandwich”. And I texted back “I’m poorly, make your own sandwich”. So when he eventually finished and came indoors he started shouting at me.

I had already taken him tea and biscuits earlier. And I don’t see why I’m responsible for making his sandwich when I can’t be bothered and I’m already struggling to look after DC never mind making a sandwich as well. But maybe I’m wrong, I don’t know.

He's a cunt.

I once dated someone like this. I would lay in on my day off and he would call me lazy as he had to get up for work. I only laid in bed until 8am. He went in the bin.

If you really don't know I would suggest LTB and never date again
Once upon a time I probably knew whether I was in the wrong or not. But DH tells me I’m nasty all the time for various reasons. I don’t know any more whether it’s true or whether he’s the one who’s being horrible.

He's being a twat. Making someone else's lunch is a nice thing to do for them but it's not something that you are obliged to do (unless they're your child). He's got hands and a brain, he can use them to fix himself a sandwich.

Do you like living with him?

I think you know this is unacceptable behaviour OP, otherwise you wouldn't have posted. You don't need to validation from us to take action to sort out a poor relationship. You do need courage and support though, so perhaps we can help you with that?

I'd go for a bit of both here. He shouldn't have shouted, but unless you're very unwell, you do sound lazy.

I’m in two minds as well. If you were able to make a sandwich fir your child you could have easily made him one and put some cling film over it so he could come and get it when he wants but equally he is more than capable of making his own food.

^ for

I’m depressed, I find it very hard to do anything tbh. I force myself to do stuff for DC but after that my willpower fails. Like I brush DCs teeth and hair but I don’t brush my own.

Seek help, speak to your GP. Still LTB.

@CorrBlimeyGG

I'd go for a bit of both here. He shouldn't have shouted, but unless you're very unwell, you do sound lazy.

WTF? No.