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Original poster

Hair removal for preteen/teen

29 replies

SandandFog · 14/08/2021 22:31

DD is only 10 and has a lot of dark body hair already.

We've spoken loads about puberty and we are prepared for her periods starting.

Im just a bit unsure how I advise on body hair? I tend to shave and use my Philips lumea. I suppose I just wait until she broaches the subject of removal, is there a best way for young girls to remove hair if they want to?

I remember being totally confused and stealing my dads old bic razor and slicing my legs to shreds 🙄. I just want to help her out. Thanks for any advice.

OP posts:
MrsTxx · 14/08/2021 23:07

Hi I was once the little girl with dark body hair at a young age. I remember my mother asking if I felt comfortable with the hair or if I’d like to remove it. I remember her suggesting trimming (private region) for situations like swimming and summer. She did show me how to shave my legs and armpits once it started to get more noticeable, but I did use hair removal cream on my armpits until I felt comfortable shaving safely.
I remember hating the smell of the nair cream though!
Maybe a nice girly day where you go to a shop and look at the different options of removal if that’s what she wishes Smile

LadyOfTheFlowers · 14/08/2021 23:18

DD is 11 and we have used hair removal cream on her legs together which went very well.

MommyRayRay · 14/08/2021 23:37

I’ve just had the same with my 10 year old daughter. Everyone was making comments about her legs & she was so down. After a lot of talking we decided to use my lady shaver on her legs & she almost cried afterwards saying she doesn’t feel like a boy anymore & she’s not ugly anymore. Absolutely heartbreaking but was such a lovely experience to share together. So now we have weekly spa days where we use face masks, do our nails & I help her with hair removal.
I know I struggled being there young with body hair & having strict parents who made me live with it until I was like 16. Was tough & i wish I could of had the same experience with my mom that my daughter did with me 🧡 you’re doing great with welcoming the fact she might feel comfortable getting rid of the hair instead of forcing her to live with it 🧡

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SofiaAmes · 14/08/2021 23:55

My DD had to start shaving her legs at age 8 she was getting teased so badly by the boys in her class (we're in Los Angeles so very little of the year are you wearing clothes that cover your legs). I paid for laser removal when she was 12. They did warn me that post puberty she would probably need to do the laser again but it was absolutely worth it. I did laser myself as an adult not long after it became available and it was such an improvement over shaving/waxing/hair cream removal. There was no way I wasn't going to offer that opportunity to my dd.

SisforSarah · 15/08/2021 00:01

I help my 9 yo shave her legs. She was so conscious. Like a op I wasn’t allowed to shave my legs until I was 14 and was bullied mercilessly . She’ll be getting lazer treatment as soon as she is old enough.

StarlightLady · 15/08/2021 03:27

A long time ago, early 40s now. Mum bought me a ladyshave when l was about 11. Easy to use.

Original poster
SandandFog · 15/08/2021 21:55

Brilliant thank you so much. This is very helpful and thank you for sharing your experiences.

OP posts:
LouLou198 · 15/08/2021 22:14

My dd is 10, I have recently set her up her own drawer in the bathroom with facial wash, moisturiser, disposable razors and shave cream which I have shown her how to use. I've told her to help herself to whatever she wants. No pressure for her to get rid of body hair, sometimes she does, sometimes she doesn't. I leave it up to her.

Summerhillsquare · 15/08/2021 22:19

I don't suppose it occurred to any of you to tell your young children that they are beautiful the way they are?

WorraLiberty · 15/08/2021 22:21

@Summerhillsquare

I don't suppose it occurred to any of you to tell your young children that they are beautiful the way they are?
That occurred to my mum

Hence the reason I sliced my legs to buggery, using my dad's old razor.

Thank goodness I had an older sister to help me.

justabigdisco · 15/08/2021 22:29

My daughter is 9 and mixed race, she has a lot of body hair. She has barely mentioned it up to now and I don’t want to mention it to her as I don’t want to make it into a thing if she’s not bothered. But equally I want to help her as/when/if she wants to remove her hair. Don’t think I’d let her loose with a razor though, think cream or electric shaver would be best. She has a little moustache as well though and I’m less sure how to tackle that. I have a Lumea but don’t know how well it would work on her skin tone.

SofiaAmes · 16/08/2021 00:54

@Summerhillsquare

I don't suppose it occurred to any of you to tell your young children that they are beautiful the way they are?
Yes, I told my dd from the day she was born that being hairy was an extra special attribute that all the women in our family share (and boy are we hairy) and that the other girls would tease her because they were jealous. And guess what, the girls didn't tease her the boys did and they were merciless and no matter what I said or tried to instill in her, it wasn't enough to overcome the teasing and I didn't want her believing the teasing which is what happened to me. Sometimes all our good intentions to have our children believe in themselves just the way they are, just isn't enough. And I think it's naive and cruel to pretend that it is enough in the cases where it clearly isn't.
Emmylouisa · 16/08/2021 01:00

Is bleaching her leg hair not an option? That's what I did until I was about 15

StarlightLady · 16/08/2021 01:54

@Summerhillsquare - Try telling that to a child at school who is being laughed at because of the hairs poking out of her swimming cossie. I know, l was one of them.

Rainbows89 · 16/08/2021 02:04

@Summerhillsquare

I don't suppose it occurred to any of you to tell your young children that they are beautiful the way they are?
Gosh.

I would imagine these parents have done that AND would like to help their kids navigate puberty in a way which feels right for them.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 16/08/2021 02:17

Place marking as my 9yo is a bit of a hairy Mary and has asked if she can shave before going back to school

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 16/08/2021 02:20

@Summerhillsquare

I don't suppose it occurred to any of you to tell your young children that they are beautiful the way they are?
That's all very righteous and romantic but when you are a 9yo and genuinely scared to do PE, to the point you lose sleep and have a knot of anxiety in your stomach on the day, because of remarks about your legs, it's not very fucking helpful is it?

I'm assuming you don't shave any body hair or groom yourself in any way then @Summerhillsquare?

WildCherryBlossom · 16/08/2021 03:35

@Summerhillsquare I tell me daughters this all the time but the reality is they don't want body hair so I think it's only fair to help them find a solution to it.

My own mother didn't believe in hair removal, deoderant,bras... I used to keep cheap bic razors & deo hidden like contraband. I just wanted to fit in at school and my mother was actually an obstacle to that.

OP, my eldest uses this razor for armpits https://www.wilkinsonsword.com/en-gb/product/intuition-sensitive-razor-with-blades/?attributepaablade-quantity=razor-6&gclid=CjwKCAjw9uKIBhA8EiwAYPUS3DkX9W3lJNd8z2JCuugM7ENcsEDcb5zIKJbfgir1YrfUWkR05gc3xoCXC4QAvDDBwE

It's got a chunky handle so it's easy to hold and manoeuvre without cutting yourself, I would definitely recommend if you think shaving is the way you want to go. She didn't want to shave everywhere though, so she has recently started using veet on her legs.

I use an epilator and have offered to get her one but she is a little wary of the pain which is fair enough. (I don't feel it at all)

Summerhillsquare · 16/08/2021 05:10

As it happens I don't remove my body hair, but then I'm a grown adult and can make my own decisions without having to look to my mother for guidance.

Teaching a girl to give in to every societal pressure at the first hurdle, without equipping her with the skills to decide for themselves no doubt cured your child's anxiety?

Summerhillsquare · 16/08/2021 05:16

[quote StarlightLady]@Summerhillsquare - Try telling that to a child at school who is being laughed at because of the hairs poking out of her swimming cossie. I know, l was one of them.[/quote]
Of course. And you turned out terribly, right? So when you 'fix' that it'll be your glasses that are unacceptable, or that your boobs aren't big enough, your lips are too thin, or that you have too many opinions. And by the time all those are dealt with, girls are just perfectly as society wants them, yes?

ShippingNews · 16/08/2021 05:45

@Summerhillsquare

I don't suppose it occurred to any of you to tell your young children that they are beautiful the way they are?
Sure they are - but when your child comes home crying because she is being mercilessly bullied and teased , do tell me how you can tell her "your are beautiful with those hairy legs".
Iggly · 16/08/2021 05:53

@Summerhillsquare

As it happens I don't remove my body hair, but then I'm a grown adult and can make my own decisions without having to look to my mother for guidance.

Teaching a girl to give in to every societal pressure at the first hurdle, without equipping her with the skills to decide for themselves no doubt cured your child's anxiety?

I’m kind of with you - I’m hairy as fuck - but I don’t know how I’d feel when DD hits an age where she wants to remove hair. Because she will, I’m sure. I know I won’t want her to feel anxious.

The issue is societal expectations but I wouldn’t want to make a point via my child. I keep my legs hairy. No need to make her.

WorraLiberty · 16/08/2021 11:12

Summerhillsquare you sound like one of those horribly judgemental parents whose DC will have to turn to someone else for help, should they choose to remove their own body hair, because they don't want to disappoint you.

It's not about you, it's about them and their own bodies. Of course it occurs to parents to tell their kids they're beautiful the way they are. I'm not sure why you appear to think it doesn't?

But that's where you own opinion over someone else's body hair should end. Your judgmental attitude to removal is just as bad as society's attitude to keeping it.

Summerhillsquare · 16/08/2021 11:17

@worraliberty my 'judgemental' attitude ends with everyone, men women and children, presenting as they feel comfortable. Where does yours end? Will your child ever be good enough?

mklanch · 16/08/2021 11:22

my dd is 12 and she is very hairy. when she went to secondary school she really started to get picked on for her upper lip hair and eyebrows. we tried the hair removal creams but she have very sensitive skin so we couldn't use them. we used a facial shaver to remove the upper lip hair and i wax her eyebrows. i also have to wax her arms (this is a new one).
i've taught her how to shave to she does her under arms and her legs.
kids can be vile and she was struggling to deal with the boys at school pointing it out. so if it makes her feel happier i help her with it.
long term i have to look into something for the upper lip as it just grows back way to fast.