If you work full time and have young kids...

[LivingDeadGirlUK]

... what do you do to unwind?

I've had such a stressful 18 months, like a lot of people I know. My hobbies (gaming) have been ruined by working from home (I don't want to be sat in the same place all evening and all day). I never have any energy and work has been incredibly stressful that I find myself waking up in the night worrying about it!

On the weekend I love spending time with my son, but I often have to catch up on work too and I'm struggling to get away from wasting time scrolling my phone on the sofa/in bed in the time I do get to myself.

The work stress is something I know I need to address but why can't I seem to make the most of the spare time I do have?

I’m the same - sometimes having the energy to pick up a hobby is actually just too much! My brain just craves mindless down time I think.

I enjoy puzzles and escape room type games/books so I need to try and pick those up more often.

@Clarkey86

I’m the same - sometimes having the energy to pick up a hobby is actually just too much! My brain just craves mindless down time I think.

I enjoy puzzles and escape room type games/books so I need to try and pick those up more often.

That's actually a nice idea, I used to game in the evenings after our son is asleep but its the same PC and room I'm working in and I am just not enough of a nerd to be able to sit there all day lol, my partner thinks he's living the dream. I could do a puzzle book on the sofa and its a change of environment.

If you are spending all your work hours stuck in, I would try and find some things to do out doors or outside the home completely. Is there a sport you could do or a local beauty spot you could visit? I'm a big fan of getting outside of my comfort zone, I find that whether I end up liking the new activity or not the act of pushing myself, doing something different and getting out of my usual pattern, opens me up to new possibilities and refocuses me in my life. I am so the same that I can get stuck to the sofa otherwise, especially when there are stresses at work or my kids are being difficult, or any of that other life stuff. I think doing something brave, spontaneous, unpredictable, unusual for you, it just switches you into a different gear and most of all gets you off the sofa in the first place!

I read, and do something cultural (gallery, theatre) once a month.

I'm hoping to get back to parkrun but ive put a lot of weight on over the last 2 years so my knees aren't great. Weathers awful here this weekend which isn't helping.

Running! It keeps me sane.

Not a lot. A full time job and two kids doesn't leave me with much more than food and sleep. I try to read

Maybe volunteer at park run while you're getting back into running. My local one is crying out for volunteers, it's really sociable and gets you outside

I put them to bed then stare at the tv with a glass of wine.

But to be honest, I think one of the problems (as you say) is the lack of differentiation between 'work space' and 'home space'. DH kept encouraging me to set up my work area in the kitchen and I kept having to say to him that I didn't want to walk past it all weekend/evening as it becomes all encompassing. I've set up in a room we don't use often and it means I can shut the door on it and walk away at the end of my working day - like I would if I were in the office. We have the luxury of that additional space, but if you can find it then I would really recommend!

Yeah I've been considering buying a laptop so I can work in the kitchen, then my office goes back to being the place I chill in the evening. Moving my desktop from room to room would be a pain.

I don't really watch TV, it makes me feel the same as the endless scrolling I currently do in the evenings, like I've wasted my time. Think PPs that have talked about exercise are prob onto something as I just sit all day but im mentaly exhausted so struggle to move if you see what I mean?

Getting fit enough to run all of parkrun is a great hobby.
it shouldn't take up loads of time, but going out for a couple of additional run/walks per week would also be extremely good for you - I go before I start work. Even 20 - 30 minutes 2 x per week plus parkrun should make all the difference to your fitness and wellbeing and you can waste loads of time planning to go to different parkruns and thinking how you can increase your speed and also yes volunteering- I aim to volunteer once every ten runs.

@LivingDeadGirlUK Can I recommend this if you do?

Journal 29: Interactive Book Game www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1635871727/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_Q54F25H2RXVRC2987QQC?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

[quote Clarkey86]@LivingDeadGirlUK Can I recommend this if you do?

Journal 29: Interactive Book Game ]][/quote]
That's really intriguing! Although it makes me think of the second season of the OA, hopefully on interdimensional travel will occur as I'm just far too busy for that!

I know what you mean about feeling like you're not accomplishing anything watching tv in the evening. I find that activities which don't take too long and achieve an end result make me feel like I've spent my time better. Things like puzzle books, small creative projects and even small housework tasks (like organising my handbag, or putting away the laundry) help me unwind better than tv, box sets especially I actually feel a bit stressed by sometimes. Like I can't relax Until I've finished all the episodes, which can take a long time with some series which seem to go on forever! And I find I stay up a bit later when I'm caught up in a series which has a knock on effect even if it's just by 15mins or so. That said I do miss tv if I don't watch it at all, but I try and save it for when I'm ill or got time off.

I also keep a "done" list instead of a todo list. So I write down everything I have done not everything I've haven't and I find that help me to just let myself off the hook when the work day is over and to not feel like I'm wasting my time off either.

When you have a busy life though you do need proper rest too, though, so sometimes it is important to just stop and recharge your batteries. I love to watch a kids film with my kids, or just listen to some audible and music, or have a long Bath. I do also love to do a little bit of meditation, breathing exercises and yoga when I get chance. A 10 minute gentle yoga routine can be much more restful than a Bath or early night actually.

I'm not a runner as I'm prone to shin splints and foot issues but I do love to have a run a couple of times a year at least. When I'm really stressed and life is getting on me, the feeling of just running as fast as I can feels like being free. I love to do this in the woods, and can think of a perfect run I had which was in the rain and woods. It was pretty cathartic.

On the flip side of that, sometimes I need a bit of pampering and just feel so unglamorous. I love to have some beauty treatments or my nails done or a massage or my hair done, it's not always easy to fit in but even just taking a bit of extra time over my skin care at home or doing a home mani pedi or a hair treatment it just makes me feel better about myself. Not for everyone I know!

I miss the OA wish they hadn't cancelled it

@TigersandTeddybears

I miss the OA wish they hadn't cancelled it

I was pretty disappointed with the first season but the second was really good and there was so much potential for a good 3rd as well.

Love the idea of a 'done list' I'm currently doing some catch up work and feeling totally overwhelmed, but I am achieving stuff so I need to give myself more credit.

If you like gaming but don't want to be on the PC, a Switch has loads of great games. I use mine a lot, both in hand held mode and on the TV.

I read a lot. I’ve got a goal to read 40 books this year and I’m on track!

Aside from that, I like to do yoga (yoga with kassandra usually) and colouring in. I do colouring in on the pigment app on my iPad.

I do exercise at night, play the piano, bake, read or play games on my tablet. In the weekend, we try to go for walks as a family. I think you have it nailed that the gaming has to be at a different place from your work, otherwise it felt like it’s a continuation. I follow headspace and they suggest dressing up your workspace for work. So maybe if you game at the desk, then put away all work accessory (or create some), and when you game, put some gaming figures etc. They say the change help us switch context. Otherwise try to game on a console and TV or casual gaming on the tablet.

I really like getting out to walk but your child have to be older. I remember I did a playground crawl one year when my kids were really young. I looked up on the council website all the playgrounds in the council. (We are in between a few so there is a lot to choose from). It makes some goal for the weekend and a list to check off. Now I do treasure trail and I also have books for walks which I tick off.

For exercise, I do Les Mills on demand which I used to do in the gym. It’s great because I find it really hard to fit in exercise classes with young kids. Now I can start straight after I finished the dishes and put the kids to bed. And there are 30, 45 and 55 min versions of my favourite classes to choose from.

I can't game on a console, as playing a first person shooter with anything other than a keyboard and mouse is heresy :P No its a good idea, I've a few final fantasy games to finish off so I could crack out the Playstation. The main game I play socially with friends is PC only though.

We are good at family time on the weekends, it's really the 'me' where I start wondering what the hell I'm actually doing with my life lol

Wow can we be friends?

I have started listening to podcasts while doing the —endless— chores

Waking up to excercise (walk/rower)

Adult puzzles and colouring

So cliche and does help.

Oh and drafting and redrafting my resignation letter daily 🙈

I’m rubbish - just stare at netflix really- and spend far too much time fucking about on my phone reading the news/arts and culture features/gossip sites during the week in the evenings.

At weekends we’re out as much as possible- loads of walking, woodland exploration, muddy moors walks etc

But tbh between work, the freelance stuff I do on the side and housework, there is precious little time as it is

I'd definitely look into changing your work setup so that it's not encroaching on your sense of down time/space.

I cross stitch. Keeps my hands busy so I can’t do mindless scrolling, I can do it while watching the tv and you actually have something to show for it.