Been dating six months. DP told me early on that he hadn’t had sex for years as he hadn’t been in a relationship. He didn’t want to do it outside a relationship. All fine. Things went slowly physically but it’s all been great leading up to sex.
We had sex four months in for a couple of weeks, all going well, then bam! DP gets made redundant. Cue him being obsessive about finding a new job, lining up interviews etc. Sex fell off the radar though we did other things during this time. As the weeks went by it became obvious he didn’t want sex. I raised it. He said he was too stressed and he was sorry, of course he wanted it but his mind was elsewhere at the moment with everything going on. He hoped it would settle down soon when he had sorted a job. He’s been preparing for an it eve he that he’s just had and he thinks he’s got the job but won’t find out for another week. For context DP is a very anxious sort of person and he has almost literally talked of nothing since since hearing about redundancy. He doesn’t have money worries but he loves working.
Anyway…I’ve been reflecting on this today. Is it an odd thing to do to put off sex like this? Everything else has been great as usual, still seen each other, he still makes an effort except he’s been working more and worried about work.
Obviously I know it’s ok not to want sex for any reason whatsoever. I’m not massively bothered by sex so I’ve found it relatively easy to not do it for a while, but don’t want total absence of it in general. Just wondering if this is a bad sign? And also wondering how we will get back into it after a gap like this.