How can I leave this relationship?

[Meme69]

I'm in a relationship that is clearly not working. Together 4 years. He moved in with me 2 hours away from where he works (but works shifts in blocks so goes back to work for 4 days in every 8) a year ago. He hates living with me. He says he hates the driving (to be fair, I've always known this) and he doesn't like it in our home as I have 3 children that live here.

I know it's not working. I know it. But, I literally cannot bear to think of us as over. I feel utter panic at the thought of it. I cannot calm down. He says he loves me, but in my book you do anything to be with the person you love. He says he can't. He wants to be with me but not the bad bits clearly. When we are together it's great, but the second he leaves and has to do that drive he reverts to saying he doesn't want this anymore.

I'm stupidly heartbroken. I know I need to just give up on this relationship, but I just can't seem to. I've had a lot of trauma in the past and this feels like a perfect storm of agony.

How do i start again? How do i let him go without feeling totally hopeless? I'm such a strong confident person to others but I feel totally dead inside.

Heartbreak is one of the worst feelings ever but there isn't a quick fix to feel better. You just have to ride it out and with time it does get better and you just learn to live without that person. Slowly you will think of them less and less.
My advice when it's over just cut ties as its faster and easier. Delete his number no contact ect
There is someone else out there who will give you what you want and need don't waste anymore time on a relationship that's not going anywhere.
Good luck 🍀

The end of a relationship is always horrible but you know you cannot realistically live with a man who hates living with your children.

It must be incredibly distressing having him going on about this. He hated living in that location and hates living with your children. Set him free. Your children will thank you.

Thanks all, I know I have to do it, I know it, but then I just completely panic and can't breathe. I'm 42, I work from home ill be single forever. It is ridiculous, I own my own house, have a great job, but feel unable to cope without a Man.ive not been single my entire adult life. I know this is a problem but years of therapy haven't helped and I just feel completely dead inside.

You will get used to living alone, in fact if you become good at being alone it puts you in a much better position when you do date again. Less needy and desperate, you will make better choices.
You need to change your perspective on how you view yourself alone, believe in yourself, trust that you can make a success out of it.
Let this one go, and move on to better things.