My toddler is almost three. He truly is a lovely boy most of the time but when he isn't it's just so infuriating. He's recently taken to fake crying where he makes some fucking stupid whooping sound non stop until he's almost hyperventilating and actually upset. It's so loud it wakes everyone up. He'll only do it to get something he knows he can't have. When he's in this mood he'll get even angrier if you do give him what he wants, but heaven forbid you then take it away. He can piss about like this for 20 minutes, all the while making this stupid noise. I know people will flame me for this, but I fantasize about just smacking him round the head when he's like this. I will never, ever, ever hurt him and our style of parenting is probably closer to gentle parenting than anything else, but the noise and the stupid reason for it really get to me. He's been waking up like this at 5.30 most mornings for the past week and demands me. He's been ill and now the baby is ill and I'm just so fucking tired and fed up of our plans constantly being ruined by fucking COVID and snotty children.