Weird people you meet on holiday.

[Diddumz]

1988 - went to Majorca with my family. There was a woman who kept pretending she was drowning in the pool.

Have you met any oddballs on holiday?

A few years ago, my DD and her five friends wanted to go youth hostelling after GCSEs, but a couple were too young to go unaccompanied. Therefore, I agreed to stay in the hostel with them for a week, in a separate dorm, but pretend I wasn't with them.

I met a lovely woman and we shared a bottle of wine in the evening. However, an awful middle aged man came over to us, and insisted on showing us his portfolio of semi-nude photos of himself. We were too polite to tell him to go away, but listened to his boring stories, and laughed about it afterwards. I said, at least the girls didn't meet him.

When we got home, I mentioned him to DD. She said they had met him - and had told him to bugger off. She couldn't believe we'd been too polite to tell him to get lost.

Early 2000s on family skiing holiday in a ski resort bar with my (now ex) DP and DS when a French guy sat down at our table. Introduced himself as ‘Neekolaz’ (Nicholas in a French accent with a lisp) and proceeded to crack onto DS and tell us ‘ees fazer, he own Meribel’ before inviting himself to our apartment for dinner. He was really creeping DS out so we messaged DB to come to bar and help get rid of Neekolaz.

DB did a great job of moving my DS’s admirer on, but unfortunately for DS, he is an incredible mimic and nearly 20 years later can send her into a rage with the most fantastic impression of Neekolaz 🤣

Penzance, 1995 - DH and I were on a camping holiday. We had a great pitch in a secluded area of the campsite. A couple of days later, two couples arrived, set up their tent. A large tent that they were all sharing.

The women were dressed very provocatively, totally the opposite of outdoor/camping attire which looked a bit odd for the surroundings, but whatever floats your boat.

Late evening, as darkness fell, they got a bit louder, saying things like 'ooooohhhh, yes, yes', followed by lots of giggling. Then the women would loudly repeatedly say 'cockle doodle do' and 'ding dong' in a drawn out, faux sexy twang.

The 'ding dooonnnnnggggg' would be followed by 'sex noises'.

We lay in our tent trying to stifle laughter, but didn't succeed. It was hilarious the first night, but wore a bit thin the second and third night so we packed up and went to another site.

About a decade later, we saw them in Sainsburys some 250 miles from Penzance. That was weird!

@Turnthatlightoff

Zante in 2006, we met a lady and her young son round the pool - they were there alone. My stepdad invited them to dinner with us the first night as she seemed lovely and we all got on. We spent a lot of time together that week then on our last night (after swapping details to keep in contact) she called our room and went absolutely nuts on the phone accusing us of stealing her stuff, plotting against her, my stepdad of being a creep.. we had to unplug the phone as she wouldn't let up. We all had a lovely evening that night and have absolutely no idea of what upset her, it was completely out of nowhere. We left the next day and didn't give it another thought, then in the October we received a Christmas card from her with pleasantries in it reminiscing about the holiday. Needless to say we didn't reply and moved house.

moved house?

Crikey that was a bit extreme

@TheChosenTwo

“Smelly Kipper” 😂 OMG! I’ve had a harrowing day in work. Your post made me literally laugh out loud. Thank you for that ☺️

The weirdest holiday we have had was in celebration of adopting our DD - against the wishes the SS. The child was totally shut down but SS preferred to send her overseas to an unknown relative, in an unknown place and placed within an alien culture (the child was born in UK and 10 years old before her case was presented in the court arena). The judge weighed up the evidence and disagreed with SS. But that’s another thread…

We arrived in Turkey. The hotel owners were over invested in DD from the time we booked in. On day three around 30 Turkish people confronted us around the pool. Apparently the hotel owners DD had disappeared at the age of 9, 10 years previously - which would have made their DD 19 at the time. Yet they insisted that 10 year old DD was their “missing daughter”.

Me and DH felt very sad for them as their plight must have been horrendous BUT the timescale and age was totally off! Our DD isn’t of Turkish origin 🤷🏻‍♀️

We were hounded for the two weeks we were there and had to call the UK Embassy to help us to leave the hotel and get back home.

We have no plans to revisit Turkey - with or without DD 😳

Oh right cool delete my whole post were i just said they rang a bell and leave up the tons of other related identifying comments

@Clarice99 it sounds like you were stuck in a weird scene from carry on camping hahaha.

@LobotomisedIceSkatingFan

'Open door policy on arseholes though. (Possibly my favourite Keanu Reeves quote.)'

Isn't that Christian Slater in 'Heathers'?

Dammit, now I have to watch Point Break again to see if Keanu says it or not, I didn't really like the film the first time around. I seem to remember him saying it when he was in the FBI office. I wonder if I have confused the two films somehow, although I really enjoyed Heathers and disliked Point Break so I'm not sure.

Either way, I will keep the phrase handy in case I ever meet and American to was happy to have attended a racist, antisemitic high school.

@Boood

An American couple plonked themselves down next to us at the Oistins fish fry in Barbados, saying how relieved they were to find some white people. We told them they’d made a bad decision coming to a country owned by black people and asked them to move.

Can’t think of any others, I tend to be quite tolerant of weird foibles on holiday and just wander off if someone is boring.

We booked into a fairly cheap motel on the Georgia/Florida border for an overnight on a road trip. When we went down to the pool there was a group of affluent-looking American women with their children in the pool. A bit later the black receptionist came down with her children and all the white children were pulled out of the pool, immediately. Our children stayed in and gradually joined the games with her children, we were glared at and clearly talked about bu the Scarlett O'Hara types. Our children found it very hard to understand.

@Diddumz

Remembered another one - 1983, family holiday to South Of France.

A loud lady from Canada strutted around the hotel restaurant in a mini dress. She was quite elderly and generously proportioned.

She kept saying hello to all the diners and introducing herself as "Aunty Needlepegs".

I have no idea of the inspiration for her self styled moniker, but she was a gracious soul.

This is possibly the maddest story on the thread, against stiff competition. Hilarious.

We camped in Wisconsin on honeymoon, and went into a little local bar where we met a very friendly old lady. She complained nonstop about the goddamn beavers ruining everything. They cut down saplings on her property and everything looked a terrible mess. She was a lovely person in other respects though, and we had an entertaining evening with her.

She invited us to visit her in the (highly unlikely) event we should ever pass that way again. We thought we might send her a postcard or something from England, so we duly noted her address.

Turned out she lived on Beaver Lodge Lane Talk about truth in advertising. What the on earth did she expect to happen when she bought that property?

I came on to say last time we were on holiday (family resort in Greece) my daughter made friends with a little boy who wore swimming goggles all day every day. At breakfast, walking to the beach, when we met him on a tour where you go on a boat to see local sights. Every single day. I was hoping we’d see him at the airport just to see if his passport picture had him wearing goggles on it.

Compared to some of these he’s not even that weird though!

Definitely Keanu- just saw Point Break the other evening

Try again with the quote - definitely Keanu 😀

Oh sorry - it didn’t work. I’ll stop now.

Nope: 'Heathers' pre-dates 'Point Break' by a couple of years.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=iLXGho3X8kE

@Saidtoomuch

We were probably the oddballs. The last all inclusive we went to was a cheapie in Tunisia. England were playing Tunisia in the football that week, so lots of England flags drapped from hotel balconies. We got wind of the British group as soon as we arrived- they were hanging about in a very loud group, mopping up other Brits, being rude to staff. We pretended to be French when they were around and befriended the rather lovely staff, who thought we were hysterical in pretending to be French. The staff treated my dh and I like royalty the last night, much to the raised eyebrows of the other guests.

This is my favourite!

In a supermarket in Portugal, queuing up at a till, a woman came up behind me and pinched my bum-really hard. I was 18 & she was 50ish. Odd.

When skiing we befriended a very middle-class, middle-aged couple, certainly not adventurous on the slopes, but pleasant. Not what you would call racy or bohemian in any way.

One morning, while we were chatting, she told us she'd painted a portrait of her husband, nude, for his birthday.

We managed to get through our coffees without spluttering.

@TeapotCollection

Coincidentally they were talking about this subject on Absolute radio earlier. One listener phoned in to say they were befriended on their first day by a couple who 2 days later asked them to look after their children for the day. They declined, good for them

Years ago we were regulars at a hotel and there were some other regulars there for the same fortnight that we were. One couple were there with a primary age child and would pounce on any newcomers with children in the hopes of foistingn their awful DD on to them. Luckily we were not considered to be suitable and had a lucky escape.

There was also a retired couple. We nicknamed them the Muttons as in the wife was mutton dressed as lamb. Every evening she appeared in a different outfit, usually covered in sequins. Way over the top for a family orientated hotel in Wales!! They were also on the look out for suitable companions for the wife to spend the day with while her husband spent all day, everyday, on the local golf course. Fortunately we weren't their type either!!

And that was in Meribel, too!

We were driving to West Berlin from West Germany so had to follow the military rules which involved presenting our travel documents at the Russian checkpoint, under no circumstances were we to interact with the Russian guards. Naturally, being a wuss, my late OH stayed in the car while I took the docs in. As I came out 10 minutes later he was still gripping the steering wheel while the children in the back had the windows down feeding the poor, fed-up looking Russian guard with Opalfruits.

On my first trip abroad with a work mate at the tender age of 17. It was a Dan Air flight to Spain.
During the flight the woman sitting next to me (aisle seat) started screaming & demanding to be let off as she felt claustrophobic. My friend sitting next to the window asked the stewardess if she could open the window.
I was absolutely terrified! 😱

We once stayed in a hotel with a huge family from a city in the North of England. They were very nice and a good laugh but were absolutely obsessed with being from that city and if it was mentioned during the evening entertainment, eg someone on stage was from there, they'd all go bonkers cheering and screaming. They all wore their city's football strip most evenings too, from the elderly grandfather right down to the youngest family member who was about 3 months old

There’s been a few. Years ago before we were married we went to a Greek island. We met a couple and went out a few times with them. One night we asked the waiter to take a photo and he misunderstood and got in the photo with us, put his arms around us all and asked another member of staff to take it. It always makes us laugh.