DH died fairly recently. They say you find out who your friends are and and that's certainly been true. Some of the friends I thought would always be there have practically disappeared and other "aquaintances" have been brilliant.
One of these is a woman from a group I've been on the fringes of for a while, but I didn't know her particularly well. She's been inviting me to all sorts of events which has been lovely. Her and her husband are very generous (probably also comfortably off) and it's always hard to buy a drink when you're out with them (although ordering by app helps, you can do it by stealth!). We've been to a couple of things where entry is c. £5 and she always insists on paying, won't even let me buy coffee.
However, their latest proposal seems a step too far. We're going to a concert. A group of 8 of us, with a meal beforehand. Including travel the evening is likey to cost £130 pp.
That's a lot to me, more than I would spend on a normal night out, but achievable for me now and again. I wouldn't have agreed to go if I couldn't pay.
My financial situation has changed from two very decent salaries to one, but it is still a decent income. Things aren't as comfortable as they were, but I am OK. I'm not an impoverished widow.
This friend has told the organiser they (her and her DH) will be paying for my ticket, (£50) without even talking to me.
Now, I know it's a kind gesture and I really do appreciate the friendship, but this is too much. I feel like I need a serious talk with them, but I don't want to jeopardise things. It was really lovely to be invited and their friendship has really widened my circle at a time when I need my friends and some have disappeared. Only one of the others from the eight is someone I would have socialised with previously, although I do know the others.
So, I have to tell her I can't go if they won't let me pay? Or accept the lovely kind offer? Something inbetween?
I was thrilled to be invited to join them, but this makes me uncomfortable.