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Original poster

I'm taking my 2.5 year old to an all day wedding next week... help!!

76 replies

dancygnik · 29/07/2021 21:32

Any tips?? I just can't even imagine how I'm going to get him to sit still and be quiet for the ceremony and meal 🙈🙈🙈🙈

OP posts:
Awwlookatmybabyspider · 30/07/2021 00:03

Well he's probably not going to sit quietly through a whole Wedding ceremony and a meal. You do have to be realistic. He's not going to have impeccable manners and etiquette. He's only 2_years old, just a,baby really.
It goes without saying you definitely need things to keep him entertained.
The coloring book is a good idea. Does he have a favorite toy. Most little boys love dinosaurs don't they.
Even then though you're going to get. "Mummy look at my picture. Look at dinosaurs", etc ect. Keeping a 2 year old child silent for that long is next to impossible.

boringbrain · 30/07/2021 00:07

Wear flat shoes because that's what I'm going to do as I will be running after him. I will also take mine outside so he doesn't cause chaos during the ceremony. I will bring his favourite snacks with me so he could sit in his pushchair. Good luck 🤞

Blessex · 30/07/2021 00:09

Easy. Babysitter

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Behaviour & development Families Weddings
BogRollBOGOF · 30/07/2021 08:24

We bought some new toy cars for novelty value to entertain through the service. Strategically sit so a quick exit is viabale.

The family weddings we went to at that stage had lots of children.around.

At DBs wedding, DH and I sat seperately, DH at the back and did have to take DS in and out a few times. It would have been easier without a lengthy delay using up a lot of patience before it got started.
We did manage to be a bridesmaid and best man with an 18m old (and in my case morning sickness)

No babysitters avaliable.

At my wedding, my 2yo niece followed her mum up to the lecturn for the reading. It added poiniancy to the words "when I was I child, I acted as a child" and was a very sweet moment in the ceremony.

orangejuicer · 30/07/2021 08:26

Are you staying over? Is it in a hotel? Do you have the option to book a room/make use of one?

I'd echo the advice above but you will need an exit strategy and breaks. Good luck!

Alternista · 30/07/2021 08:47

If he makes any noise during the ceremony PLEASE take him out. I didn’t hear a word of my best friend’s vows thanks to a screaming toddler, it was awful.

Other than that- take a range of favourite and/or cheap new toys, snacks and activities. Have enough to bring a new one out every half hour. Take a device with kiddy headphones and download some episodes of his favourite shows. And get outside and run around every chance you get. Make your peace now with the fact that choosing to take him means you WILL spend more of the day in the lobby/gardens/car park then you ever have at a wedding before!

Good luck.

mindutopia · 30/07/2021 09:08

I've taken both mine to weddings that age and never found it a problem. For the wedding, it's usually interesting enough that they'll sit and watch. But sit towards the back on an aisle where you can quietly slip out. In between ceremony and meal, there is lots of running around and people to see and they don't have to be quiet. At the meal, one of us will just take them outside in shifts while the other stays behind until food comes.

I've always packed a whole selection of snacks especially if it's all day and you aren't sure what sort of food will be available. Some colouring, a small quite toy, change of clothes and layers in case it gets cool in the evening. Really always been fine and we've been to lots of weddings. There is almost always someone around to entertain them for 10 minutes so you can eat and get a drink too.

ClemDanFango · 30/07/2021 09:23

Are you drunk? Get a babysitter!

KatieKat88 · 30/07/2021 09:23

Reusable stickers really helped during the meal with 20mo DD the other week. Plus you have a built in excuse to skip boring bits of the ceremony and speeches- use it!! Are you going with DH/family? Lots of tag teaming makes it a lot easier. And snacks (for everyone involved)

LouLou198 · 30/07/2021 09:27

My did went to her first all day wedding at the same age. It was fine. Packed a large changing bag with lots of drinks, snacks and wipes. Also went to the pound shop and picked up lots of things to keep her amused through the day. I bought small colouring books, stickers, mini finger puppets, mini etch a sketch. She was quite happy, and spent the evening dancing and playing with other children. I think she even managed a nap in her pushchair during the photographs.

Kinsters · 30/07/2021 10:59

I don't see why it would be a problem. Yes during the ceremony he'd need to be either quiet or not in the room but the rest of the time everyone is milling around, there'll be food and dancing, maybe an outdoor area. It won't be as much fun for you as you'll have to be watching him but he'll probably have a great time. For the meal he'll probably sit a while and eat/watch what's going on and then when he's done just take him around the dancefloor or whatever other areas there are.

Not clear from your post whether you're going alone. If your partner is there or it's a family wedding then definitely tag team with someone so you get to eat some food. If there'll be noone there you know well enough to watch him for a while then I'd be making plans to leave early!

Loubiemoo · 30/07/2021 11:12

@DennisTMenace

Definitely expect to need to go for a walk through the ceremony. Sit at the back so you can sneak out quietly. I have been to weddings where kids screamed through the whole thing and I really don't understand why the parents didn't just take them out to the reception area. Or graveyard if a church.

Ds age 1.5 kindly shouted out random nonsense just as the vicar asked if there were any objections at one wedding. Luckily we were at the back, so they didn't hear where it mattered.

My 13 month old also did this. I was so embarrassed. I apologised to the bride and groom afterwards, but they just laughed and said it was funny.
Szyz2020 · 30/07/2021 11:18

Is it just you going with your child @dancygnik? Or are there people your child knows and trusts who will help? If not to be honest I wouldn’t bother going! It will be a day of you entertaining a small child in stressful circumstances. Being quiet in a ceremony, not being able to play / chat as they would like, things happening at weird times, general fed-upness with what is likely to be a boring day for them.

They may of course be one of those children that loves new people and chatting to new people etc and hopefully there are nice guests who’d be delighted to chat to your child and engage with them in which case it might be easier. But I’d still aim for time out or an early finish for any guarantee of some success with this!

problembottom · 30/07/2021 11:34

Ooo my DD is the same age. My problem with this is I could take her, she could charm the pants off everyone and we could have a wonderful day. Or I could take her and she could ask to go home after five minutes and not sit still for a moment. I just wouldn't know.

user1471538283 · 30/07/2021 11:43

My DS was at an all day wedding at 2 and he was fine. I spent some of the long ceremony with him outdoors and at the meal he was happy as long as he was eating or with his DGF. There were other children there to play with but we left at 9 because he was shattered.

By 6 at another wedding he had a whale of a time and we were there until midnight!

MissLucyEyelesbarrow · 30/07/2021 12:09

Ceremony-sit near the door and run at the first sign of trouble. Bribe with raisins or sweets (not chocolate).

Reception- I wouldn't worry too much as they're probably resigned to toddler antics, if they're inviting toddlers, but take out if there's a full- on tantrum. Take food as the meals will probably be at the wrong times for him. Lots of walks around outside.

Nicolastuffedone · 30/07/2021 13:08

And if he starts being noisy, please don’t do lots of shushing first…just take him out!!

MissLucyEyelesbarrow · 30/07/2021 13:25

@Nicolastuffedone

And if he starts being noisy, please don’t do lots of shushing first…just take him out!!
This. No one minds random shout outs from littlies, because you can't predict them or do anything to stop them, but it's so selfish when parents don't take out kids who are fussing or crying. Yes, it's crap if you miss the vows, but don't spoil them for everyone else.
DappledThings · 30/07/2021 13:34

I don't think it's that big a deal either. The actual ceremony they might need to be taken out of for a bit and I'd have some quiet colouring they could be doing. Most weddings then have a prolonged period of drinks and photos so plenty of time for running about and letting off steam.

Nobody is going to expect him to sit quietly throughout the meal, you just let him wander outside a bit between courses if needed. Then it's dancing and music when he can run around as much as he likes again.

HopeYourHighHorseBucks · 30/07/2021 13:43

It really isn't as bad as you would think. (Unless your childs behaviour is on the wild sideGrin)

Ceremony be prepared to leave at the first sign of restlessness. Sit at the back. I wouldn't bother with any shushing or whispering, as that is more distracting than a random noise from a toddler. Just sneak out and wait for everyone else.

Once at the venue I imagine photos will be done, your DC can let off some steam then, avoiding the photographers obviously. The sit down meal can be a bit tricky, but colouring pens etc iPad and headphones will get you through it. Then once the music starts and people start mingling it will be easier.

HazyDaisy123456 · 30/07/2021 15:13

We took two our DC to BIL’s wedding as they were flower girl and page boy at just over 3 and just under 2. It was a very large wedding and I was very stressed and dreading it beforehand. Fortunately, I wasn’t told they would be the only children in attendance or that would have sent me over the edge.
They both behaved impeccably (although as SIL was very late), it was a catholic wedding which took ages and the photos and food took ages. They were ravenous. They did well with the wedding food having half portions of adult food. I had lots of snacks, books and sticker books in a pram bag) as DD was still in nappies.
They both had a brief sleep (DD fell asleep as soon as she walked SIL down the aisle) and I cuddled her and DS fell asleep in the car driving from the church to the venue. They were up until after 10pm and hit the dance floor dancing together and many of the guests on SIL’s side still remark and remember how well behaved they were at the wedding.

whoslaughingnow73 · 30/07/2021 15:18

@CrouchEndTiger12

This is why I don't understand why people get angry at child free weddings. Why would you do this ?
Agree! We never take our (nearly 3 and 5 year old) children to weddings even if they are invited unless it's close family where they'd be missed.

No way thanks! I have a much better time with them at home and so do they.

Franklin12 · 30/07/2021 17:25

Honestly those people who say their children are cute and everyone was admiring them. They really aren’t! I went to my cousins wedding last year and a family member sat at the front with her little one and wouldn’t move when the usher said could she move to to the back.

Needless to say he screamed the place down during the vows after lots of shushing.

Please don’t do it. It spoils it for others.

Original poster
dancygnik · 31/07/2021 22:21

I'm actually quite surprised at a lot of these responses. My son has been invited to a family wedding so I wouldn't dream of not bothering to take him. He will enjoy all the fuss and loads of people being there even tho I might find it stress at times trying to keep him entertained in the church etc. I thought most of the fun was having youngsters around though, that's what part of a family is! It makes me quite sad to read that a lot of you think children are just annoying 😕

OP posts:
nc8765 · 31/07/2021 22:23

Fuck that. Get a babysitter for the day and enjoy yourself!