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Attitude to other people relationships

3 replies

Unsuremover · 26/07/2021 12:53

I’m looking for some insight into my friends attitude and maybe some suggestion about whether to tackle it or not.

I’ve known her since school, 20+ years. We get on like a house on fire and have supported each other through thick and thin. I love her and want her in my life. All that being said I’ve noticed she hates everyone’s partners!

I knew she hated her brother in law because of the way he treated her sister, fair enough seemed reasonable. We have a friend in commons who’s husband is arguably “not good enough for her” so again fair enough to run him down. But after I realised she doesn’t like my husband that much either I thought more carefully (too much time on my hands maybe)

It’s not just men either she hates her nephews parter and various other woman. It’s like the partner of “her” person (the person she has a relationship with) is never good enough.

It’s come to a head because someone called her out on talking shit about their husband and I was at a lost of what to say, cause how can anyone just dislike a partner (apart from them obviously actually being abusive or whatever). She has reason “after they got married they were joined at the hip - that’s controlling”, “he isn’t half as clever has her - he doesn’t let her grow”, “she saw an easy meal ticket and lets him work too hard”.

Incidentally her own husband doesn’t get the same treatment. She knows his faults but he is deemed a good match. I feel for her kids, how will they possibly marry someone “good enough”.

This probably doesn’t make sense but does anyone have any clue? I dont want to lose her but I’m having to say “what’s it to you?” an awful lot.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 26/07/2021 12:58

This probably doesn’t make sense but does anyone have any clue? I dont want to lose her but I’m having to say “what’s it to you?” an awful lot.

Tell her to delete her Mumsnet account? 🤔😂

She doesn't sound like the sort of person I'd want to be around really. Far too judgy and possibly a bit bitter deep down, as perhaps her own relationship isn't that great.

There's nowt you can do really because people like that tend not to change, although I suppose you could ask her to keep her judgements inside her head when she's around you.

Unsuremover · 26/07/2021 13:06

@WorraLiberty I do wonder if she’s on mumsnet, she started saying narcissistic a lot Confused

It’s only this issue though, other than that she’s great. And it’s not all the time, just if anything positive comes up about a partner. Recently it was someone thanking their husband for throwing them a zoom birthday party and suddenly it was “he’s so needy and she’s got to act like the sunshine’s out his arse or he’ll sulk”.

I am a cow though cause she literally just text to see how my ds is feeling and did he want to play online with her (older cooler kids) cause he’s been not well.

OP posts:
Unsuremover · 26/07/2021 17:26

Quick bump cause I’m still curious

OP posts:
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