Do you think hugging/cheek kissing on meeting will become a thing of the past?

[Kizty]

I have met with two lots of people recently who I haven’t seen for a while. Pre Covid the done thing would have been an (awkward) hug/cheek kiss on meeting. I am awful at these and actively dread in advance as I feel really awkward and normally end up going for the wrong cheek etc. And it was a relief to be honest to just say hi and have a catch up and skip the hug. Although I appreciate some miss the hugs and I don’t think hugs with very close family will dissppear ever- I would always want to hug my mum. But with aquaintances, I wonder if it may? (Hoping!)

Well all my circle of family and friends are all back to hugging and kissing. It's lovely. So normal.

We even had big hugs and kisses with the staff when we returned to our local Italian restaurant last weekend .

@Babdoc

For people who live alone, being hugged in greeting is the only physical human contact they get. I hope it returns as soon as it is safe to do so.

Exactly. I missed hugging and human touch so much that I had skin hunger. It was so hard. Being single too did not help.

Question to those pp's who would not dismiss a kiss or hug in France, Italy or Spain, why then so against it here?

Human contact is good for humans. They let you know the other person has no hostile intentions in a way gestures/words can't

Not necessarily. Some people do have hostile intentions hence I hate it and still have ptsd decades later. And yes I have received help for this before anyone suggests it.

@stickygotstuck Human contact is good for humans. They let you know the other person has no hostile intentions in a way gestures/words can't.

Rubbish. I've suffered a fair few "hostile" encounters from people with whom I've shaken hands or hugged, etc. It's nothing but empty gestures.

To think that someone shaking your hand or hugging/kissing you means that they're not going to have hostile/evil intentions is deluded.

I think doing a little bow is so lovely and respectful . This should introduced for work/ acquaintances

@stickygotstuck Human contact is good for humans. They let you know the other person has no hostile intentions in a way gestures/words can't.

Funniest thing I've read today. It doesn't do anything of the kind. Most con merchants prey on the gullible by using that kind of logic. Likewise with bullying/abusive behaviour. They just put on a "show" of being kind/friendly etc with a hug or handshake. It's the simplest trick in the book. Means absolutely nothing.

@lannistunut A handshake is required at times.

When?

[quote Kazzyhoward]**@lannistunut* A handshake is required at times.*

When?[/quote]
I think that at formal meetings/introductions it is necessary to have some kind of understood gesture. I personally would prefer a bow or other no-contact, but am fine with handshake as that is expected.

But a hug or a kiss from some random person? No thank you, never necessary IMO.

People who like to touch people need to ask permission before doing it, IMO.

I don't do handshakes either. People are too grim and don't always wash their hands after they have been toilet. They would be more offended if they saw me immediately go and wash my hands or get the antibac gel out until I could find somewhere to wash my hands.

I have mates from around the world. They don't get offended when they cannot touch me. They respect my boundaries and understand that people are uncomfortable for a multitude of reasons from sensory issues to abuse.

When I have shaken hands I stand there with my hand like a contaminated object until I can wash it

@canigooutyet

I don't do handshakes either. People are too grim and don't always wash their hands after they have been toilet. They would be more offended if they saw me immediately go and wash my hands or get the antibac gel out until I could find somewhere to wash my hands.

I have mates from around the world. They don't get offended when they cannot touch me. They respect my boundaries and understand that people are uncomfortable for a multitude of reasons from sensory issues to abuse.

I agree with all that. I'd definitely be the one who'd get the hand gel out after a handshake (and I've done that pre covid too). So they have a choice really. They can be offended that I clean my hands after a handshake or they can be offended if I refuse a handshake in the first place. I think it's good to give people a choice of how they want to be offended. (It they're the kind of pillock who gets offended at that kind of unnecessary triviality in the first place!).

I'm very cuddly with DH, my adult DDs, and sometimes my son-in-law if he offers a hug which he sometimes does as he's a sweetheart .

I dislike hugging anyone else and won't be going back to it. It became a silly ritual that most people didn't really want to do but thought they ought to as the norm.

@user1497207191 @Kizty

Sorry to hear of your negative experiences.

However, I stand by my words.

I am not talking random, unwanted physical contact by strangers, but an expected convention. That's literallly what greeting conventions are for. Humans started showing their open hand/shaking hands in greeting to show hthere were not holding a weapon! And within that, of course some cultures are more tactile than others.

Will some people abuse them? Sure, just like other people abuse the fact that you are passing very close to them, or that you are alone and weaker on a dark street, for instance. But that's nothing to do with the fact that affectionate - or at least well-intenioned physical contact - is what the human brain craves.

Just ask babies, or all those poor Romanian orphans who were damaged for life precisely because of the lack of human contact.

As I said, I really don't like physical contact as a rule (like you, I also have my personal reasons). But I appreciate the reason for it in formal or social scenarios.

Sorry, I meant @Kazzyhoward !

I hope it doesn’t stop. My circle of friends and I are very touchy feely! I can’t cope without hugs.