Sperm Donors

[ButterflyBailey]

Has anyone had experience with donors before? My partner and I are looking at different options and we don’t know what to expect. If anyone has had good or bad experiences or any advice that would be very welcome and helpful, thank you.

We used Xytex in the USA for ours and would really recommend them. We have baby and adult photos for our daughter to see him, plus lots of background info on him and his family. The USA seems to give the most info which was important for us (for our daughter). Process was very easy.

I also used Xytex and was very happy. I went for an open identity donor and one who was happy to supply adult and baby photos (back then - 15 years ago it was rare to find adult photos but I felt I had to know what the donor looked like). I went to a clinic in London and they had already dealt with Xytex so they dealt with getting the sperm over and it then had to be quarantined for six months (i think) while they ran their own tests on it. As for whether it's fair in the child or not, i'm currently on holiday with my son and another mum with her donor conceived son, We met when the kids were 3-ish at a workshop run by the Donor Conception Network about how to tell your kids that they're donor conceived. We've been friends ever since. They boys are 14 and haven't shown the slightest interest in their donor fathers - they're both have an irreverent sense of humour and joke about it, They know they're deeply loved by us and that seems to be enough.

there's a Facebook group called donor conceived people, siblings parents and donors where adult donor conceived people give great advice on what is best for the children. I recommend you join and read a lot before making any decisions.

because of ancestry sites now, known donors generally can be found much earlier than from 18 as can other siblings. there's a lot of Facebook pages linked to each sperm bank where donor siblings and parents find eachother too.