Watched Betty Broderick show, definately don'tagree with the murder, but I can understand how she was feeling, after my divorce.

[thecatmother]

Firstly , I have to say that we do somewhat co parent satisfactory now, and it has been a few years since the proceedings. The winter just gone I watched the Netflix Betty Broderick story. Although it is heavily biased, it did resonate with what I went through during my divorce.
I kept thinking about it and am aware that our memory can fail us so I dug up the court bundle. I don't know what possessed me to read through it again, as it was the worst possible time in my life, as my exDH wanted a full residential custody of our 2 children.
Anyway, I did , and just re-reading the sheer number of absolutely untrue allegations from him in one sitting has really shocked me . I am so glad that the judge had seen through those and although he did question me about some , he didn't pay attention to many.
We had a drawn out battle, and the majority of time.i had to stand up for myself and explain why I was a good person. I remember being so constantly stressed and not seeing wood for the trees, as every month I would get a letter from his solicitor with some additional information or demand or accusations. I was called an alcoholic (I'm not, but had to prove it), a mentally unstable woman (I am not, but had to give a gp letter), accusations about "abandoning " my children (left them with exDH while attending a hen do ), literally every single move and breath of mine had to be justified.
He presented himself in the shiniest colours possible and was very keen to completely get rid of me.
I can definitely relate to people with PTSD after their divorce, as it took me a while to regain my confidence as a mother and generally start feeling normal again.
I didn't want to get rid of him, but I remember that accute feeling of dread and fear and guilt.
We haven't spoken about that since, and I don't think that he would like to anyway. But it was such a contrast between what our relationship was like and the way he presented it.
Couldn't sleep last night, as was thinking about it again.

A friend of mine went through a divorce nearly as acrimonious as the Betty one. My husband and I watched the Betty show too and he was really affected by it, when I said this was how awfully my friend had been treated. He knows some other awful divorces through work and the whole show he said was very eye opening and shocking.
I thought it was a very good show too and said I could totally understand why she murdered him! I hope she’s happy now, even though she’s in prison (still?). Just the way he callously moved on, it absolutely made my blood boil.

This show, had literally dragged me back to that dark place. I was forever scared that he won't bring my daughters back from his place, and he was rarely on time. On the other hand, I had to be exactly on time or before and I would get his solicitor angry letter with threats. The rumours that he spread: that I wasn't allowed near his house, that he was "protected " by the police and for his safety I was only allowed school drop offs and pick ups. All written down and no proof to any of that, neither I had any desire to follow him. It felt like there was one set if rules for him and different set of rules for me.