Top tips for camping virgin (with someone I rather fancy)

[Incipit]

Haven't ever been proper camping, and now going this weekend, for 6 nights. The friend I was to share a tent with has had to pull out, but she's lending me her gear. I still want to go because it's with a friendship group which includes a man I've been lusting over and have had very few opportunities to spend time with. So I don't want to look a complete incapable eejit. specially as I've got to drop DC off for their far more exciting holiday with my parents first, so will be arriving way later than everyone else.

I'm collecting the tent etc this evening and will practice putting it up. What else can I do in advance?

The weather forecast is for 23 degrees most days, but thunderstorms some days. Usually I pack light for holidays but I'm guessing I need plenty of layers and getting things dry will be difficult? Does it get chilly at night? Do people go to the showers/toilets in a dressing gown or a coat?

Basically any top tips will be gratefully received, and don't assume anything is too basic to need to be stated

Bring loads of booze, wet wipes, painkillers and chocolate

^

This

Lower your expectations and dial-up your personal tolerance levels. Someone always kicks over the remaining milk/wine, or fails to stop someone's dog licking the sausages or peeing on the tent...

And a shopping trolley is actually a great means of lugging random bits of kit across a field if you have one and can 'own' the look

[quote TheSandgroper]Hmm. Lusting. You might need to read through this

www.ukcampsite.co.uk/chatter/display_topic_threads.asp?ForumID=3&TopicID=153928[/quote]
Brilliant thread, thank you The Sandgroper !!

@Susannahmoody

Bring loads of booze, wet wipes, painkillers and chocolate

^

This

But make sure the chocolate is Minstrels because a) they're designed not to melt too easily and b) they're the best.

@SleepingStandingUp not ‘guide ropes’, tents have ‘guy ropes’
Guide ropes are for assisting the moving of something
A guy is an old name for a securing cable/rope

@Incipit
Most of it is all covered

Big tent yes
But the pop up is a good stop back for a late arrival, if it’s too dark for the proper tent
(It could be useful to ask for a hand putting up your tent due to it being late)
I’m always happy to help putting up tents (but I’m also the type of man who doesn’t want help - I have my routine, I can get tents up better myself even those that ‘should’ take a couple of people. It’s handy with large tents to have someone steady the fibreglass poles
I’ll help others then get my own tent up quicker while everyone else is finishing off theirs

Familiarise yourself with the tent, are the poles all the same, are they different lengths, are they colour coded etc?
(When it’s your own tent if it’s not colour coded or if only one segment has the colour I’d recommend a strip of the appropriate coloured electrical tape on both ends of each pole)
Some tents have an adjustable strap at the point that poles clip - loosen it to make it easier to assemble and tighten as required when it’s up

Check the bed fits in the tent without touching any sides

For guy ropes I usually peg out the minimum required. For classic ridge tents they are essential as it won’t stand otherwise, for fibreglass bendy poles the tent holds its structure by itself so needs whatever guy ropes to hold up particular sides or to keep layers separated. If there’s any weather expected then I will use the guys
A basic pop up can be used with no guys and no pegs - but you look pretty stupid when it blows away
Most pegs that come with tents are very liable to bending. Don’t hammer them too hard, and if you have a choice use more substantial ones.
Screw in ‘drill pegs’ are great - but don’t try to screw it down when attached to the tent or a guy - as it obviously tangles up !

I would advise against sex, but being prepared is vastly better than not. If things happen inside the tent then everyone will know, a quiet walk off can work - but sound travels, and flushed faces are highly visible despite the darkness when you return if everyone is sat outside communally
You can have a cosy romantic time and spend the night gazing at the stars
It’s up to you to case out whether it’s better for you to show you aren’t incapable, flutter your eyelashes as a helpless maiden - or somewhere in between

Guitar - no
It’s a terrible cliche and can go badly wrong
You’ll soon find out if the group are inclined for a sing song and bring it in the future

Get a Shewee for nightime toilet trips if it's raining! If its a lovely clear night there is nothing more magical than wandering back to the tent, admiring the stars, hearing the wild animal noises, tripping over a stray guy rope, stubbing your toe on a peg, tripping over the washing up before snuggling back into the warm sleeping bag

You cant shag quietly on an air bed. Get a couple of roll up camp mats to line the floor instead! (Self inflating mats better but quite an investment for a once off trip and no certainty of said shag.

No to nappies - embarrassing if seen 😆

Avoid pop up tend at all costs - near impossible to pop back down!

I used a mattress topped on top of my bed or mat, a sleeping bag, 2 pillows and a duvet. Never had any issue with condensation and I've never been cold through the night. I'd never manage with just a rucksack for 6 nights unless it was huge. Dc use cabin sized suitcases and I take a large hold all

Don't forget torch and spare batteries

DC and I all have Oodies (well cheap versions) used every evening and for night time toilet trips. We all have a pair of waterproof shoes (wellies or hiking boots) a pair of trainers, something slip on for the showers such as flip flops or sliders to walk to and from shower block

This is the easiest example that I’ve seen on packing a pop up
Note the tip to keep the door unzipped, and the key to making it easier her way is to put the tent on the ground

If you have the knack then it’s possible to hold it in your hands and do a twist. But using the ground to assist makes it much easier

You'll have a car, so you can leave a lot of stuff in it. I would pack several small bags, not one large one. You then swap out dirty clothes with fresh supplies from the car.

Those hamman towels (light cotton) or even a piece of linen work well as quick-drying towels, if you don't like the feel of microfibre. Dry them in the car if it's raining.

Spare batteries for head torch.

YY to power bank, as PPs have said.

Peeing in the night - just go at the edge of the field if the toilets are too far. I don't get people who are hardy enough to go camping in the first place but too naice to pee outdoors

Classic things people forget - though this may not be an issue if the others are experienced campers: soap, washing up stuff (bowl, detergent, sponge, tea towels), corkscrew (nooooooh), bottle opener.

I love my pop up tent. Takes 30 seconds to put up/down, weighs nothing and cost £50. I take my camping seriously but if I arnt using my nest hammock or bivvy I always fall back on it. Thinks its a company called lumaland.

Have one plastic box in your boot for clothes, have one plastic box for kit like washing liquid, torch, knife etc.

On arrival empty kit box so you now have one empty box.

Keep all clothes in car, fill up empty box with used/wet stuff.

Wellies: wear with shorts/jamas/joggers

Umbrella

Festival trolley: never lug your stuff again

Thank you for all the further advice. You lot are amazing.
I raced to Decathlon after work, so I’ve got most of my list now.
And my friend mentioned on the group chat that I’m a camping virgin, and the lush man said “need any advice? Happy to help” which is an invitation to message him directly, no?

The empty box in car thing is genius @TSSDNCOP

@Incipit

Thank you for all the further advice. You lot are amazing. I raced to Decathlon after work, so I’ve got most of my list now. And my friend mentioned on the group chat that I’m a camping virgin, and the lush man said “need any advice? Happy to help” which is an invitation to message him directly, no?

Certainly is

If you do decide to take condoms, leave them in the car (until needed, obviously). Otherwise some sort of mortifying 'everything spills out of your bag as you arrive in the dark' or 'dog raids tent and runs round the entire site with them' is guaranteed . Mind you, if either of those happens, it will make a fantastic update for this thread.

You need:

Earplugs and eye mask for insane early morning light and birds tweeting
Cosy jumper or blanket to cuddle in while having late night chats around the fire
Warm socks and footwear that doesn't soak the socks when there is dew or rain on the grass
Something to wee in in the middle of the night
Something warm under you to keep the cold out
Fun snacks to share
Book for quiet moments
Power bank for your phone
Snacks for if you get hungry in the night cause it's shit if you can't sleep due to a growling stomach
Wet wipes & deodorant
Your own pillow

Good luck!

@Incipit

Thank you for all the further advice. You lot are amazing. I raced to Decathlon after work, so I’ve got most of my list now. And my friend mentioned on the group chat that I’m a camping virgin, and the lush man said “need any advice? Happy to help” which is an invitation to message him directly, no?

Yes!!

"Hi, I've no idea what I'm doing with the tent, do you mind giving me a hand? x"

Stick a kiss on the end....

Don't mention erections, poles etc....

Hi, I've no idea what I'm doing with the tent, do you mind giving me a hand?

Jane Austen has you covered, OP:

Where people wish to attach, they should always be ignorant. To come with a well-informed mind is to come with an inability of administering to the vanity of others, which a sensible person would always wish to avoid. A woman especially, if she have the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can

Never gets old

(And before anyone accuses of me of rampant sexism, it does also work in reverse, as long as the man comes across as keen to learn from the woman''s expertise and acquire competence, rather than a bumbling man child)

From erect poles to Austen

He promised to help me with the tent, however late I arrive, so I said I’d make him breakfast to say thank you.

@Incipit

Thank you for all the further advice. You lot are amazing. I raced to Decathlon after work, so I’ve got most of my list now. And my friend mentioned on the group chat that I’m a camping virgin, and the lush man said “need any advice? Happy to help” which is an invitation to message him directly, no?

Perfect opportunity for going to private messaging. A safe bet is to say that you’ve had a practice go at putting up the borrowed tent, showing that you don’t want to show yourself up as a total numpty, but that help will be very appreciated. It’s up to you how safe you word things or how much you open the flirty-ness

Unless you’re after a potential one off quickie, make sure you always keep us men thinking we’ve got to work for it
Also as it’s a group thing I’d still be inclined to keep things from crossing a line, but make sure the seeds are set for something else together

I use condoms to carry water

Friggin Nora, what a score! Cooking you brekkie eh

Did you get a backpack?

Sorry, cooking HIM brekkie

I've had beaujolais

Head torch. Which I'm sure no one else has suggested, I'm not blatantly place marking or anything...

Honestly, sounds like a slam dunk to me, have a brilliant time!

Following for updates!