how to turn from a slob into a neat person?

[HotChocolateAndMarshmellows]

Hello,

Can anyone give me tips on how to not be a slob anymore?

I'm very messy and want to be cleaner and neater, but I don't know where to start. It's all so overwhelming to me.

I always admire the clean houses of my friends and want to be like them. x

Declutter
Set a 10 minute timer on your phone, pick one room, do as much tidying/cleaning as you can in those 10 minutes and once done walk away. 10 minutes is doable as it’s so short but you’ll be surprised at how much difference it will make. Then if you feel like it do the same on a different room. It will help you get on top of everything without overwhelming you.
I also write a list for each day with just a handful of tasks that I really want/need to get done that day that are small and achievable - so for instance, Strip and make the beds, put on a load of laundry, Hoover the living room, polish the dining room table etc and they don’t have to be big tasks and start of with just a couple, but that way if I get nothing else done I feel like I’ve achieved something productive.

I think there is a difference between tidy and clean. I’d start with clean. I have a lot of things but things are clean.

I’m putting in a word for a bit of clutter. I’m not a hoarder but I also don’t like really minimal idea either. I try to be tidy but my house looks lived in - tidy when there are guests but not perfect show home - I might manage to do a huge clean/tidy/declutter once but then I’m sure I’d let it slip and be disappointed in myself immediately and the next time the friends visited.

Think about how much tidiness as an ongoing priority. It is is really important for you lots of ideas here for decluttering and I’m sure one of the methods will work. I know some MN have transformed their houses to tidy and kept it up.

I was never really taught to be clean or tidy growing up and have consequently struggled as an adult. Not helped because DH is blind to anything falling anywhere less than under the heading of extreme squalor.

Firstly I agree with most of what has been said here. De-cluttering has changed things enormously, as it has meant that I now have adequate storage which was our biggest problem.

Initially I started with one tiny area. In my kitchen it was the area by the back door, door mat, two galvanised bins that contain the dog food and the recycling. That area was always clean, no jumbles of shoes, no splashes, clean doormat, recycling taken outside etc. From there it was easy to move to the windowsill above the sink and so on.

I've also got a list of stuff that is done on a regular basis, eg 1st - descale kettle, water filter, shower head, 2nd - flea treatment etc.
Monday - dust the picture frames, Tuesday- change the bed and so on.

Get rid of a load of stuff. Then get rid of some more stuff. Make sure everything has a place and put it back there once you’ve finished using it. Think really carefully before you bring more stuff into the house.
Read Marie Kondo. You have to apply her method and then stick to it. The decluttering and tidying stage can take a while but if you do it properly it’s not too hard to maintain.

When you see something that’s needs to be done, do it. Don’t say “it can wait till later” because when later comes there’s more than one thing to do.

Spend 10/15 minutes before bed tidying. Cups/glasses in to the dishwasher or washed and put on the rack. Fold up throws, plump cushions, clear the coffee table. Wipe the kitchen counters down. It’s so much nicer getting up in the morning without crap lying everywhere.

Storage, storage, storage!

I grew up in a dirty, messy home. I find that if my house is not clean and tidy I’m quite stressed. It’s a matter of finding a routine.

I always take things to the right room. Periodically I weed out book and useless kitchen equipment. I put clothes away every day, including but nothing only clean washing.

In terms of cleaning (not exactly your question, I know), if I ever feel there is too much to do, I at least do some daily. Even 5-10 minutes.

*Including but not only.

Declutter! Not just once but regularly - every time something comes into the house think through do I need this (another kids drawing, post, plastic toy from a kids magazine, etc.)

Have a place for everything.

5min tidy ups of a space a couple of times a day (eg, hallway before bed, living room once kids leave for school, whatever) You will be surprised how much you can do in 5mins.

Make your bed, put away dry dishes from the drainer - just little rules to start living by.

Hope this helps! I am no domestic goddess but these little things help me x

You have to resign yourself to doing actually quite a lot every single day. I struggle with this! In theory, every day someone in this house should:
Empty dishwasher
Fill dishwasher
Wipe kitchen surfaces
Wipe dining table
Load of washing on, previous one hung out/in tumble drier, put one away.
Cook dinner (and often lunch as well)

Those things are basic, and on top of that we’d need to also do some sort of cleaning. It’s relentless and I hate it and in general I suck at actually doing it. I think it probably adds up to about an hour a day not counting cooking, just on household chores.

All these things. Always make your bed. And find something good to listen to at the same time.

My top tip is to move house!!!

We were in our last house for 12 years, moved in with a toddler and a baby and moved out with 3 tween/teens and all the assorted stuff we had accumulated over the years!
We also moved from a house with no attic and a tiny garden to shed to a house with 2 attics and a garage!!
When we moved I planned exactly where everything would love in the new house right down to the drawer! I also got lots of drawer inserts/storage boxes etc
We also threw away 2 skips worth of stuff/old furniture, shot loads of recycling bags and a van load of stuff do the scrap man plus several tip runs etc!!!

The new house is much easier to keep tidy because everything has a logical and planned place. There are still pressure points where things get messy eg the hall where the shoes rack is as people tend to just leave shoes on the floor, or the kids rooms etc but generally it’s easier for us to keep on top of it as we aren’t bursting at the seams

Do something every day.
Deep clean one room per week, it takes an hour or so in the kitchen.
I done the DC's rooms today, base boards, window frame, good vacuum, organised toys, it won't need a big clean fir a month just lift and wipe 4 minutes a day.
It takes me longer than most people I'm not naturally organised, I usually have netflix on my ipad too while clearing.
No matter what's happening ill sort smelly chores daily wash plates, one clothes wash, empty bins everything else is as I go.
Building up dirty washing, hard food plates and over full bins is depressing to me and makes it difficult to get through.

I second finding something good to listen to. I find the tedious jobs like washing up and cleaning the kitchen unbearable - unless I am listening to a good podcast, in which case I’ll sometimes be sorry I’ve finished the work!

I massively struggle with decluttering - particularly actually getting stuff out of the house - I have a massive charity shop bag but it feels like such a faff to actually take it in.

Minimalism. Having significantly less stuff is a game changer. The Minimalist Mom on YouTube is great, she talks about household inventory and how everything in our home is something we have to manage. When you have less stuff to put away, the cleaning bit is much much easier.

You need a lot less stuff!
I don't recommend picking out the odd t-shirt or ornament you can live without, that will take the rest of your life to complete and in the meantime, more stuff is entering ...
I found Marie Kondo helpful - start with one 'category; that you don't have particularly strong feelings about, underwear in my case. The feeling of having got rid of manky pants and socks that were functional but old and ugly was very rewarding. Kitchen cupboards is a good one too - throw out food you haven't used for ages, simplify what you have (how many mixing bowls do you really need etc) organise your storage (labelled baskets for i.e. packets, baking items, are great).
I can now clean sweep regularly without feeling any guilt about discarding things that I don't love. (They go to charity shops or freecycle, or sometimes sold on which is good.)
Everything needs to have a place and although that sounds obvious it needs to be a place that has room for it, is easy to access and isn't jam-packed with other stuff.
Do not persuade yourself that things will 'come in handy one day' - ghat's a hoarder's motto!

Above was for tidiness.
Cleanliness takes effort. With order it is easier, but it does take some self-discipline to get on with the things that just need to be done - the organised mum metho is helpful if you need a structure to base what to do each day. But in any case, you do need to do the basics every day - pick up, wash up, put away, wipe down.

@thelegohooverer

You need to check out a slob comes clean

100% this! A Slob Comes Clean is for people like me (and maybe you) who are not naturally tidy and organized. It really helped me. Start from the very first podcast episode.

I used to be a slob but when I moved from a house share to a tiny studio I was forced to get rid of tonnes of shit and I found all the little things like cleaning the bathroom in the morning after a shower, washing up and putting away everything as soon as I ate, putting things away as soon as I used them and doing a little tidy before bed made my life so much nicer, less stuff really makes things easier to tidy as you go In my slightly bigger flat I have found that washing and doing the ironing/putting away of all my work/fun clothes early on the morning of my day off is much less messy and stressful than the clothes horse half full all the time in the middle of the living room. It really is no work at all, still only vacuum every two weeks though, and yes when I am busy my flat becomes a state, but the difference is rather than a full day of sorting it takes maybe 45min to do.

It really comes down to making clearing and clearing easy. You have to find a proper place for every single item and then it will be quick and easy to put things away. And everywhere will be clear for quick cleaning.

I want to know how you work through the resentment of feeling like everyone's slave and subconsciously just giving up on it all as you'd rather live in a pigsty than feel the murderous rage. But in reality living in a pigsty is also causing a fair amount of resentment/murderous rage. It's hard being an angry feminist before the world has caught up No way to win really

It's hard being an angry feminist before the world has caught up hmm No way to win really
As a feminist you must know equal rights apply, set up a rota if they won't tidy don't give them any treats, take their gadgets away, hit them where it hurts.
If you've a lazy OH he needs to get on board as a partner.
Stick your big girl pants on, lay down some house rules, are you a feminist or slave for the family?

I’m with all the others. Everything needs to have a home.

Sometimes this means more storage.

Often it means less stuff!!

Also I am dyslexic: adhd maybe all that stuff.
Plus the kondo I have found that doing 10mins on 10 mins off of work / tidying is really useful.
Forgetting all that ‘get in the flow’ stuff, just never happens. But just pottering around clearing up stuff as I go along for ten mins, then having a break, then repeat, means I get lots of jobs done.
You have to work out what works for you, not what ‘should’ work.

But just pottering around clearing up stuff as I go along for ten mins, then having a break, then repeat, means I get lots of jobs done.
Me too my attention span is awful.
I set little challenges do 5 things before the song finishes, sometimes I get 3 sometimes 7.
I keep sitting to read the news/mumsnet/anything that pops into my head.
I make myself get up after 5 minutes, it's conscious pushing that helps.