If you've ever had a nanny...

[OhToBeASeahorse]

I tried to ask this on childcare but it wont let me start a thread?

Just employed a nanny- no agency. We understand we are her employer but if you could tell me anything we need to consider in terms of contract/pay/anything else practical or any tips you have.

Thank you!

Use a company like nanny paye. It's only about £200 a year and they do it all for you. Calculate pay, issue payslips, negotiate tax needed and tell you how to pay.
I think it's extra for a contract.

You need to either use a nanny pay agency or you can register as an employer as with hmrc yourself and use their basic tools (free) to calculate tax and national insurance which you must deduct and pay monthly to hmrc. You also must offer an occupational pension eg use Nest the government backed one. Sample contracts are available online and you must give a minimum of 20 days annual leave plus 8 statutory holidays.

I've direct employed carers and done the tax etc myself, not difficult

Don't try and pay her net of tax. You must pay her fully salary, plus tax

And don't go down the cash-in-hand route either.

Both of these are tempting, the former especially for you - but if/when your nanny wants to apply for a mortgage she has to be able to prove her whole income. And HMRC do investigate.

Remember that she is your employee and, no matter how well you get on/how much the children love her, you must treat her with the same respect as an employee would have. She will have legal rights too, which you must make sure you're familiar with.

Definitely draw up a contract; if she's an experienced nanny she may already have one from previous employment that you could use as a start point.

An important thing to agree on is holiday - when she can take her holiday. You can't just assume that she will have holiday when you are.

Make it very clear, from day one, what you want her to, and especially what you don't want her to do. We had a nanny share at one point, and the other family were forever ticking the nanny off for things they didn't like, although they hadn't made any of those things clear!

A couple of examples where the nanny got into trouble:

• no pushing the pushchair along busy roads, because there would be too many emissions from cars at the child's eye-level.

• no processed foods to be eaten (but also with no definition of 'processed')

• no driving with the child on a motorway

etc, etc.

You may also want to consider what benefits you're prepared to offer the nanny. Sometimes these are more attractive than more cash - for example, we put her on our family gym membership, which meant not only could she take our DC swimming, but also she could put the baby into the creche for an hour while she went to the gym/had a swim.

I used to deduct tax and NI and had to fill in a form for HMRC - the local tax office were always very helpful, but suspect that help may have been cut now.

Really useful so far thank you!!!

You need a contract that states notice sick leaves holidays. When she get paid any over time needed.
I’d also consider a code of conduct with any deal breakers while she is working in your home. Ie not locking up home properly or smoking etc best not to have any I thought it was obvious so I didn’t say at the start conversations.

Oh, and something else that's very important, is to agree with her what her specific duties are. That may seem obvious - but many who have posted on Mumsnet before seem to expect their nannies to somehow become their housekeeper, and expect them to clean, do washing and even cook for them. You should start from the basis that the nanny is there to look after your child - so cooking, laundry/ironing, etc only for them. Anything in addition to that is a bonus, but you shouldn't expect it.

And will she be using her own car? You need to consider how much you're going to pay her for petrol/how you're going to monitor that. petrol for her drive to/from you is her expense, but anything else (where it involves your DC) you should be paying for - so work out a system that you think is fair for this.

The tax side of things is really important. I advertised what to me was a gross rate. The nanny started and about month later asked me to pay her tax! So make sure you're very clear about that.

Have a small amount of cash available that she can use for outings etc (ask for receipts if necessary).

I used to have a diary where she could write any important things in that happened during the day (e.g. fell and cut knee, refused lunch etc) as I was often getting home just as she was leaving and it’s not fair to expect her to stay late to update me.

I had fussy eaters so have ideas for lunches, evening meals when she first started.

Make sure there’s tea/coffee/milk and food in the house for the nanny’s lunch. It costs very little but it is appreciated.

And as someone said earlier, set out expectations early. I never expected our nanny to be a housekeeper, but did expect to come home to the house in a similar condition to when we left in the morning (e.g toys tidied if not longer being played with, mess cleared after eating). Keep you house relatively clean and tidy for her, it’s her workplace.

I'd also say that you need to be realistic with your expectations.

It's a very long day for a nanny - they don't really get time off for their lunch break like you will be doing at work!

So don't expect them to be filling every single minute of the day with activities for your child, but accept that they need some down time. Equally, though, I have read of nannies who just cart their charges round with them, while they socialise with their nanny friends. Like everything, compromise is essential!

And in the very early days, if something isn't working for you, then tell her. It's very easy to let things go and start festering about it - and then get resentful. It's probably a good idea to build in half an hour at the end of each week to chat about how things have gone - making your nanny know that she can also say what's working/not working.

Time-keeping is essential. Hers, obviously! If she's due to be with you at 8.30, then she must be there by then. But you also owe it to her to be punctual getting home from work. Good nannies will always be flexible, understanding that sometimes trains/buses are late or the traffic is awful, but make sure that this doesn't happen often. Leave work in good time - ideally you should be aiming to arrive home 15 minutes before she is due to finish, and this gives you a bit of buffer time.

Set ground rules re social media. My nanny blocked me from viewing her Facebook account. When she stopped working for us, she friend requested me and I discovered that she had posted four years of photos and updates about my DC on her Facebook page. It did not occur to me to set a ground rule about social media but, in hindsight, it’s a really important thing to cover.

Yep definitely recommend nannytax for sorting PAYE

I have always had a very good rel with nannies
BUT not too close
That is important
Maintain some distance

Also a generous payer
I never quibbled
And consequently they are often willing to be super flexible at last min etc
Also I didn’t ask for lots of housework etc
They were looking after my children. Not my cleaner.

My rule was ideally id like to walk in at the end of the day, and for hall way clear and things out away.
Couldn’t stand walking in to clutter!

God this is all so useful, thanks, DH and I will sit down and go through it later.

DH WFH 95% of the time so our lateness wont be an issue. I absolutely need her to be on time though!

Dh WFH is a massive thing to consider though. He really does need to abide by the rule that during the day, when the nanny is there, she is in charge

I literally cannot explain how detached DH would be. Today at about 11 he asked me if i was taking our eldest to softplay. I'd taken him to childcare 3 hours before....

Re annual leave.

It’s pretty ‘normal’ (acceptable) for nanny to have 50% of the days of her choosing and 50% of you choosing. Think about Christmas, New Year & school holidays in advance.

When Ofsted came into force, it was advised that at the time that employers wrote down specifics for playdates eg No more than 2 children on the trampoline at any one time. (H&S issues)

Write down any allergies so nanny can’t deny knowing.

Keep a fully equipped first aid kit to hand and plan fire escape routes together.

Discuss meal plans/likes/dislikes.