How old for going into bathrooms alone?

[TriCeraBottom]

I’m just wondering roughly what age everyone started to let their children go into public toilets alone?

We were at a very large country park (with paid for rides, crazy golf etc) yesterday. It was extremely busy with families but also popular for runners and dog walkers. My DS (just turned 7) said he needed a pee so his dad and him went ahead. When the rest of us caught up with them I was surprised to see DH waiting outside the men’s toilets having let DS go in alone. It just wouldn’t have occurred to me to send him in alone. If DH had not been there I’d probably have taken us all into woman’s bathroom. I said to DH after that I was surprised and thought he was too young just yet and that it was a decision we should take together. I got the impression DH had allowed him in alone before.

Am I being overly cautious or is DH being naive?

I certainly don’t see danger everywhere or think there is “a pedophile on every corner” and don’t have my children glued to me but I do feel 7 is too young to go into public bathrooms alone. Things like doors not working, mess, scaling water, etc etc and yes there is a big element of not knowing who else is in there as well. I’m just wondering if DH or my thoughts on this topic are more “normal” (I think my DH thinks I am being very silly and over protective about the whole issue).

My daughter is 6 1/2 and I usually let her go in on her own now while I wait outside. She's very sensible though.

I’m with you OP, my DS is almost 9 but with ASD.
He’s still coming into the ladies with me!

My 6.5 year old DD will go in by herself in supermarkets etc but I wait just outside the door

I made my son come in the girls with me til he was 6 then lurked outside the men’s waiting for him after that!

I always go in with my 6 year old.
Something awful happened at a supermarket near where I grew up though and it has skewed my anxiety around this. At I’ll stand the other side of the toilet door but not outside the toilets.

I only started letting my DS go into the men’s toilets alone when he was 9. I’m really overprotective though, I admit. I’ve read horror stories about sexual abuse in public toilets and just felt too worried but he reached an age where he felt awkward being in the female toilet so I had to respect that.

Primary age I took mine. Even the ds's!

If it was a 7 year old daughter then I’d think it was fine for her to go into the ladies toilets alone. I don’t know about boys though. I can understand why you would feel nervous about your son going in alone but I suppose there’s got to be a cut off at some point and your husband was right outside?

I did come out of a cubicle once and there was a boy I know in the ladies with this mum. He was Yr6, I think that is too old personally!

I agree with you op, not over the top (in my opinion)

Ds 8 always goes into the toilets with dh or myself in the ladies.

If with me in the ladies, I stand outside the toilet cubicle door.

My 6 year old thinks he's old enough but I know that a stiff door lock, a door too heavy to open or a tap out of reach would potentially cause him to be quite upset. I'd rather not loiter outside the men's loos either. I think my DD started going on her own at about 7-8 but usually places like a pub or cafe toilet where she was unlikely to get into trouble. I really don't think it warrants a big discussion with your DP though. If he felt it was OK on this occasion I would accept his decision.

Ds is 9, 5ft 2 and doesn't want to come into the women's with me anymore as people started getting twitchy with it once he hit 5ft or so. I sent him alone into a toilet over the weekend and he came straight back out followed by a man who confirmed that it was vile and said to take him into the women's or behind a bush instead! DH says he worries more about how disgusting the average men's toilets are than anything else.

Mixed opinions then. To clarify when I take him into woman’s he does go into cubicle alone. Obviously dodgy lock etc could happen still but then I’d be outside to assist/get help etc.

I just feel he’s too young to be alone in a public bathroom. It’s true though that they come of an age where it’s not appropriate to go into the women’s but I don’t feel he’s there yet at 7.

I don’t particularly want a “big discussion” with DH but few it’s something we ought to agree on together. I admit I was pretty shocked when I saw DH standing outside and realised we weren’t on same page on this.

I’d let my daughter (if I had one) go into the women’s toilet alone at age 7.

I wouldn’t let my son go into the men’s toilet alone at that age. I think DS was about 8 or 9.