Think I’m about to slightly lose my shit with the neighbours

[YellowBellyCat]

We’ve lived next to them for 20 years. Pleasant enough but so bloody loud. Radio on in the garden full blast most warm days. Frequently music playing until late at night. Either in the garden in the summer but sometimes through the wall in winter (semi). We’ve asked them politely on a number of times to turn the music down when it’s got past midnight. In fairness they always have but I’m sick of lying in bed until the small hours feeling like I’m the unreasonable one.

I’m sick of never been able to enjoy the garden during the day as I don’t feel I can ask them to turn their music off/down in the day. I bought noise cancelling headphones last year and while they drown out the noise I certainly can’t sleep in them as they’re big, uncomfortable over the ear ones. I struggle wearing them for long in the day.

So at 11pm tonight I’d had enough and turned my phone up full blast and left it playing music in the garden. One particular artist. They obviously found this hilarious and asked their Alexa to play the same artist (fairly obscure, not heard them,play it before in 20 years). And they just turned their Alexa up. I kept it going for 30 mins and then brought my phone in/turned it off.

I feel like starting it up again at 6am tomorrow! I just feel so at the end of my tether! Surely most people realise that playing music loudly at 11pm isn’t fair on anyone? I know a 6am concert would neither be mature or sensible but I’m just so fucked off.

I have no advice but I'm lying in bed listening to music coming from either side of us, seething, but too scared to do/say anything.

What are your local bylaws time/noise level wise? This doesn't sound occasional this sounds like a long ongoing issue so make a complaint! You've tried talking to them yourself and they're still doing it. They KNOW it's disturbing you and they don't really care. I suspect they're turning it down when you ask to avoid an official complaint.

But they're not really stopping the behaviour.

Where I live we have antisocial behaviour laws and also wardens to enforce. Not perfect but better than this I think

If you lodge a formal complaint and you wish to sell your house at any point you are obliged to declare this

I don’t think I could face a potential full on neighbour dispute that an official complaint might bring.

I am tempted though to reintroduce a cockerel back to my chickens as they complained to me about a previous cockerel which they reckoned woke them up at 3am every day. I never heard it and funnily enough I’m not giving a shit now. At the time I dispatched it to appease them.

@LindaEllen sorry you’re having the same issues. It’s so bloody unreasonable!

cockerel idea is a good one. get one asap.

Get yourself down the cock shop first thing. Leave your phone playing Old MacDonalds farm full blast in the garden, whilst you procure the cock.

"procure the cock"
fnah fnah

We have awful neighbours , being loud is one of the major issues.
anything after 11pm - 7am is considered Anti sociable behaviour.
Start noting the time they play music till.
Our local council also uses the noise app, where you can record the behaviour and it send repcording direct to your council

I’m just worried about it escalating….so the cockerel probably not the best idea.

They’ve stopped the music now but seem to have set up some noisy, motorised thing going full guns inside the house which is making my head throb! That’s been going for over twenty mins, no idea what it is but it’s making me feel sick. Knowing my luck they’ve bought an industrial air con unit which they’ll run all summer to push me over the bloody edge!

Have you got youngish kids? The Barney song on repeat...or general kiddies nursery rhymes/annoying songs on repeat but you go out for the day so you don't have to listen to it.

I would get the cockerel too. They know the music pisses you but they don't give a shiny shit.

I would buy a new bird because I would feel better knowing that I was returning the favour!

Yes I would replace the cockerel. At least its a natural noise. If they complain tell them exactly how you feel about their constant and thoughtless noise.

All this tit for that stuff is hardly going to help.

I think you need to talk to them again as a first step. I know you said that you've spoken to them politely on a number of occasions, but I think you need to really spell out exactly how bad the problem is and lay out what you think the solution is, for example, no loud music after 10pm or music in the garden for up to 2 hours a day only. Whatever you think is reasonable. If they continue, then it is time to escalate, but some people just have the hide of a rhino and genuinely don't realise what kind of impact their actions are having on others. Hopefully, you can reach an amicable solution.

For example, with whatever the motorised noise is, it may be possible to place it on a rubber mat to reduce vibrations.

"Send in the cockerel" to become the new "cancel the cheque"?

Agree with foxvillage. Speak to them, say exactly what you want. Make them explain why the music is so loud and then explain the problems it’s causing you. I’d ask for set quite times in the garden, say 1-3, 8 onwards too.

If they are continuing to play loud music at unsociable times after you have asked them not to then I would contact your environmental health department of your local council who will deal with it. Unfortunately they won’t be able to do anything about them playing their music in the garden during the day as there are no laws against that but you’ll definitely have a case for them playing it late at night when you are trying to sleep.

I really wouldn’t go down the petty route of trying to out-do them with your own music early in the morning as this will just give them leverage, and if you did decide to go down the proper channels they could have a case against you.

Well I resisted the temptation for early morning music. The chickens outdid themselves this morning though and two of them decided to start with their best cockerel impersonations at about 5am. They only do this occasionally and I normally cringe…..I wasn’t so bothered today!

@80Dodgeballs

Have you got youngish kids? The Barney song on repeat...or general kiddies nursery rhymes/annoying songs on repeat but you go out for the day so you don't have to listen to it.

You are evil! I've now got Barney’s song in my head, and it's been 22 years since I last had to listen to it!

Music should be off by 11pm.

I agree it’s annoying- we love music and would actually happily play it all day. But our neighbours detest it, so we very play any and if we do it’s off by 8pm at the latest.

Our neighbours are currently playing tit for tat having louder parties on alternate nights. They’re a pair of selfish bastards.

No idea what I would do in your shoes - I always think if asking them nicely/politely doesn't work, then what us the alternative without it potentially turning nasty. They must have zero self awareness to be that unreasonable. Selfish people.

I'm not a very confrontational person but I once asked my neighbours ( who I think are great btw) if they could not put there wood burner on for a few days. They kept putting it on in the early evening during the hottest few days of the year - we had to shut all our windows as the smoke was horrible ( and our DD was a baby at the time!)
They were pretty mortified and didn't put it on again for months.They always text us now if they are going to put it on!!

Is moving an option for you?

I would definitely just move, I would have had a breakdown by now!