You can have everything you want, but not at the same time?

[MareofBeasttown]

I used to hear this and not realise what it meant, but going through it now. Currently experiencing a level of professional success that I never expected, but my personal life is shit ( covid related reasons). One of my DC is doing fantastically well in school, the other fantastically badly in university. Some of my friends have really stood by me in the pandemic, others seem to have forgotten I exist.
The dissonance is getting to me!

But none of those things have any causal relationship to one another.

Oh sure they do not. Am I not making sense? I have to admit my head is very muddled these days. The ups and downs are doing my head in....

Whenever I've heard this, it's generally people telling me I can't have a career and be a decent mum. They weren't wrong BTW.

How can you help your DC? Are you even able to? As for the crap friends, bin them off. Job done.

I feel like it's the opposite for me. Everything is going smooth or everything is in the shit.

"You can do anything but not everything"

• David Allen

I usually find at any given moment I have one out of time, money and health. Time but no money and not great health, money but no time and not great health, or health but no time or money. Not always, but that’s the trend!

@MareofBeasttown

Oh sure they do not. Am I not making sense? I have to admit my head is very muddled these days. The ups and downs are doing my head in....

No, I get what you’re saying, I just think there isn’t the slightest truth in the idea that if one area of your life is going great, another is disastrous to ‘compensate’, any more than ‘having it all’ (a woman having a career and being a decent parent) is impossible.

I agree OP. You can have it all, just not at the same time. In my experience anyway.

I agree with this; currently trying to be a good mum to young DC, have a good relationship with DH and have a decent career. It’s impossible to have all three at once I’m finding but at different stages of life I hope to have at least one or two