Useful tips for the tired & easily distracted

[ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba]

When making coffee or tea it's helpful to fill the kettle with some water before switching it on.

When cooking food in the oven success depends on two important steps: putting food in oven & turning heat on.
I recommend doing both - completing one or the other is just not enough.

When you are sitting down and drop a pair of scissors DON'T try to catch them by snapping your thighs together.

Also, contrary to popular belief, it doesn't matter how many times you press your car key button it WILL NOT open your front door. true story.

I also recommend not draining your made- from-scratch chicken soup or pouring your freshly pumped breastmilk down the sink.

🥴🤣
thanks for coming to my TED talk

When making a lovely chicken stock do not capture all the bones, gristle, skin and boiled veggies in the colander and let the stock all run down the drain

When you're exhausted and flopping into the bath with a cuppa, don't drop the cup in the bath so you end up bathing in very weak tea.

Spoons don’t go in the bin and kettles don’t go in the fridge.

Milk doesn’t go on toast.

Always look down before you lock your front door- you’re probably still wearing your slippers.

You have to put the PIN into the keypad when you insert your card- it doesn’t just automatically know it.

milk doesn't go on toast
🤣

Hoovers work best when switched on at both the wall and the Hoover.
Phones and other electrical appliances that’s need charging, need to be plugged at the wall and at the gadget. Again the wall socket needs to be switched on.

If you are standing next to somebody else's car, you will not be able to open it with your key fob, no matter how much it looks like your car. Handy hint - is that hat on the back seat yours? No? Probably not your car then.

Memo to self after this morning. No matter where you THINK you left your car, no matter how hard you search for it, it is always going to be found where you actually left it. Damn staff car parks.

It’s considerably more comfortable to wear shoes that match.

coffee whitener is pretty disgusting in tea

However much you try your bank PIN number will not open the security gates at work - even if you have a large queue behind you and you keep on trying.

😂

Your Oyster card is powerless against your work security barriers. Powerless.

You cannot pay for shopping with an AA card.

The shop assistant doesn't care that you keep typing your phone number into the pin card thingy

Take your sunglasses off the top of your head before looking for them

knives are sharp

When going to sit on the sofa to relax it is probably more useful to take mobile phone rather than keys.

Have more than once tried to use work pass on tube barriers.

@SomethingNastyInTheBallPool

Your Oyster card is powerless against your work security barriers. Powerless.

When our new security system at work was fitted you could use your Oyster card to get through the (not very) secure barriers!

When putting away the breakfast things the cereal does not go in the fridge and the milk does not go on the top of the kitchen cupboards.

Draining pasta over the sink works best if there is a colander in the sink first.

And my time-saving tips are:

If you were inside when you noticed your house keys weren't in their normal place, you probably don't need to thoroughly search the car in case they fell out of your handbag earlier.

Unplugging your hairdryer so that you can plug in straighteners to heat up whilst you dry your hair is not as efficient as you think it will be.

Trying to serve things out of a saucepan using a spatula because 'it's quicker than going to grab a ladle' is, in fact, much more time consuming (and generates far more cleaning) than going to grab a ladle.

Work fob doesn't open your front door
The kettle doesn't go in the fridge
Boiling water goes in the mug, not the jar of teabags
The cat will be very happy to eat your scrambled eggs for breakfast but putting his cat food in your own bowl is not as appetising

when using sewing machine it's best to press the pedal with your foot, not the flat bit of the extension cable.

Saucepan lids don't go in the microwave, even though they look pretty.

Always worth checking and rechecking which connecting station you need to get to, don't assume 'it's that one'.

Never, ever forget that Sods Law governs everything. You'll get caught out a lot on that one. Don't bother getting hopes up, that way when things do go right you can be pleasantly surprised.

You can't light a cigarette with a tampon, lipstick/other random stuff in your handbag.
You can't charge your phone by putting the phone next to the charger cable.