I'm dreading this wedding!

[OhToBeASeahorse]

The son of very very dear friends of ours is getting married. A few people have said no and we know they (our friends, not really their son) would be really disappointed if we don't go.

But:
4 hour drive away
Wedding is at 1pm which is smack bang on both our kids nap time (they are 2.75 and 9 months)
We will have to leave at around 6.30 to get the kids back and in bed in our hotel room. Neither are going to fall asleep at a wedding reception, no chance.

It's just such a pain and for anyone else we would say no.

Tell them you're self isolating. Feign massive disappointment over this sheer misfortune and that you are looking forward to seeing the photos and or video

8 hours of driving in 1 day sounds horrible especially for little kids. Can you book a cheap hotel nearby and make a little trip out of it? Maybe visit somewhere the kids will like on the way?

Sorry just re- read and saw you have a hotel booked already! 🤦🏻‍♀️

Definitely self isolation! Works a treat!

Can you book a babysitter for the day?

Yeah we have booked a place for 2 nights so we arent doing all the driving in one day.

I just cant let them down. They are like grandparents to our children.

Oh I'm dreading it!!

Your nearly 3 year old should be fine and will probs sleep a bit in the car - and then I'd fry to manipulate the 9 months old naps around this. It's annoying but that's having small kids

No chance for babysitter. DD has never been away from me yet, she is breastfed and we don't have anyone around who could or would do it really

Book in to the hotel the night before to avoid a long drive let the kids dance a lot at the wedding and be with their honorary grandparents and enjoy.

Have you got a double buggy? Just tuck them down in that in the evening, or alternatively I used to take blankets and let them sleep under the table, just scooping them up when it finished. They are really portable at that age.

How close is the hotel you have booked to the wedding venue? Assuming you are going with a partner (you say 'friend of ours') can you take it in turns to go back to the hotel room with your children, if needed. One of you goes back at 6.30 to put the children to bed whilst the other one stays for evening reception.

And as others have said, could you book the night before the wedding at the hotel too, to avoid too much stress on the day?

Honestly OP its one of those things that you'll feel better for having sucked it up. We went with our 2.8 year old to a wedding recently. Were able to have her asleep upstairs in the hotel which made it easier, took turns. She normally does bedtime rigidly at 7, we let her stay up till 9, she was asleep by 10. She had a BALL. And was in decent form the next day, and had an impromptu early nap on a 3 hour drive the next day, and was in great form after that. I'd be tempted to give it a go staying later and see how you feel. You may all enjoy it more than you expect.

It’s not a wedding without a random baby asleep in the corner and toddlers raving about. It’ll be fine. I was the strictest Gina Ford devotee ever back in my day but I wouldn’t stick to a routine on holiday - and this is a little holiday.

Everything I dread turns out to be amazing so I hope that’s true here too.

I just cannot see getting the baby to sleep. Sven on holiday we stick to routine. Toddler will be ok but baby... I just cant see it