How much for ‘personal spends’?

[Vetyveriohohoh]

Inspired by another thread about how couples split money…

We are totally agreed on a one pot ‘family money’ approach. Everything goes in to joint account for bills and we each get a ‘personal allowance’ each month then the rest is siphoned off in to savings.

Where we have a rub is I’m keen to prioritise savings whereas DH wants more personal spending money.

As a % we’re putting 30% of net income into savings. We were late on property market, no inheritance etc expected, so I think it’s important.

All family stuff is covered in joint bills.

Personal spending covers:
Mobile phones
Haircuts/beauty treatments (me)
Hobbies
Random personal purchases/clothes
Individual socialising
Gifts for each other or our own families

What do you think is a reasonable amount? We are comfortable, and obviously saving a lot so not looking for a view on how little it’s possible to live on more what’s average for a nice life.

Thank you!

This is so difficult as we don't know your overall income, out goings or how much you're putting into savings. I'd say £600-800 a month for personal items each based on what DH and I spend but totally aware that's a lot to some people and a drop in the ocean to others.

30% is a great amount for savings.
I think 'how much for personal spends' is one of those 'as long as a piece of string' questions.

Do you like Designer, High Street or Charity shop clothes?
Do you want to do a £20 haircut every 4 months, or fancy highlights plus nails plus extras every month?
Is the hobby knitting or horseriding?

I think you just need to chat - if you decreased savings a bit, what would the 'extra' spending money be spent on?

It really depends how much you earn. DH and I each get £400 per month, but then it's never 100% fair as - for example- he drives a much more expensive car than I do and that comes out of joint funds.

Another thing to consider is what your pension savings look like and when you expect to pay off your mortgage. Also whether you think you'll be able to (and want to) work until/beyond state pension age.

If you're only putting the minimum into a pension and you're looking at paying a mortgage until or beyond retirement, what you save now is an important consideration.

Because if you spend too much and save too little, you face either having to work longer than you might want to or an old age in poverty or not having enough money for the lifestyle that you aspire to. Might downsizing to release money be an option as part of your retirement planning is something else to think about.

@rookiemere

It really depends how much you earn. DH and I each get £400 per month, but then it's never 100% fair as - for example- he drives a much more expensive car than I do and that comes out of joint funds.

You could add your car budget to your personal spends amount to overcome that. If he wants a more expensive car, he needs to make the money work out of his personal money.

At the minute it’s £500 each, he doesn’t really have an answer for what he’d spend it on just that he’d like more. I suspect clothes, Lego and diy stuff 😂 very rock and roll

Depends on how much you earn surely?

I know a lot of people follow the 50/30/20 rule but that doesn’t work for some especially if your needs are more than 50% of your income.

Cars are fine in that they are pretty even and come out of joint.

Likewise pensions are reasonably healthy, mine looking slightly better than his as I’m younger with similar pots. So as long as we don’t get divorced all ok 😉

£675 each a month here although doesn’t cover mobiles
Gross income about 8.5k if that helps you work out the proportion.
It’s enough, could always spend more but then I could spend more if I had thousands. We’ve had to be very frugal before, and we’ve gradually increased, and I think this is a good amount without going silly.

Around £500 each too. Works fine. If there's an occasional big spend that doesn't count and we always discuss it before.

@Seesawmummadaw what’s the 50:30:20 split? That’s interesting.

Very much depends on what you categorise as a "nice life". DH and I have a similar system and have £250 a month each which is more than enough. But we don't have expensive hobbies or spend loads on socialising (socialising more likely to be a bottle of wine round someone's house or curry on a cheap banquet night) or clothes.

If you have more champagne tastes then you'll need more income to match.

Why not try putting values against each of your categories above? Sort of like a mini budget.

@UserAtLarge I think that’s exactly the problem, it’s totally how long is a piece of string? We could probably both spend thousands if we have ourselves that. That’s why I wondered how other people approach it, just a bit of a reality check.

People approach it in many different ways, you just have to try and agree what works best for you.

Can you cut any of your essential expenses to free up more money for saving and personal spends? Can you increase your income, from either working more, starting a side business, or chasing cashback offers, matched betting etc? Do you always look for discount codes, compare prices etc to make the most of your money? There's lots of little tweaks possible that can add up to a significant increase in how far your money goes.

The 50:30:20 guide suggests 50% of earnings on mortgage/bills and essentials, 30% on general non essential spending and 20% into pension / savings

We consider ourselves reasonably well off and give ourselves £85 each per month plus we split bonuses (usually an extra £2000 per year, so £1000 each).

We has similar issue, we agreed to save extra every second month - seems to work! You always know you have extra coming next month - so it can help reduce the impulse buying of larger items - ahem looking at another piece of exercise equipment that was going to change my life.

If it's a case of you'll spend whatever you have, why not approach from the other direction and think about what you are saving for, how long you want to wait for said thing, and therefore how much you need to save each month. Then work out how much left for personal spending.

Mostly saving for long term things… to offset mortgage while interest rates are so low… hopefully enabling early retirement and holidays.

@Vetyveriohohoh it’s basically 50% needs, 30% wants, 20% savings.
You could do a variation of it, for example if your needs (regular outgoings/essential bills) are more than 50% you would adjust the wants and savings or if like me you want to prioritise savings you might make that 30% and wants 20% iyswim?

I've had everything from £30 to £2000 free money a month. Totally depends on what you can afford

£800 was a good, healthy amount I seem to remember being able to do mostly what I wanted with that. A lot of The £2000 got wasted really

As an example, I get paid £2k a month, £1250 of that goes on my ‘half’ of the mortgage, bills, fuel, food etc, £400 goes to savings (sometimes a bit to pay off credit card if I’ve bought something the previous month) and then in left with £350 to cover my own bits and bobs.

DH earns more so pays more towards bills but we generally end up with similar fun money and savings.

I get the child benefit paid to me and that goes towards all kids clothes, treats and extra fun stuff for them

we get little personal money - everything goes to pots of money first, then whats left - we have hols , different savings, etc.

Going to do us a nice spreadsheet tonight to try to work it all out again. It’s been a while!