MIL bingo! (lighthearted)

[LaMadrilena]

First off, this thread is intended to be lighthearted! But after a visit this week to see our 5-week-old, I've realised my actually lovely MIL is slipping into the realms of cliché since her granddaughter's birth... So far I've had:

• "You're making a rod for your own back" (by not leaving her to cry)

• "So, when's she getting a little brother or sister?"

• "See, you just have to know how to hold her" (Said loudly over DS's hungry wails, while stuffing a dummy into her scarlet face and jiggling her up and down rather violently.)

• Bonkers advice: "You have to close her mouth if she falls asleep with it open."

• Downright dangerous advice: "I used to put a pillow next to DH's face to wedge the dummy in when in his cot."

• Comment on own daughter's superior mothering prowess as DS falls asleep in auntie's arms.

So, I think that's a line for me. Anyone want to contribute for the full house?

Oh, and this one, which might be Mediterranean-specific:

• "This child's hands are freezing, she needs mittens." (It's 30ºc in the shade here.)

The midwife actually warned us in antenatal classes that all MILs will say this.

" Don't they look the image of their Father... everyone says so"
" Oooh, X loves chocolate, must take after his Dad"

Ooh I’ve had, ‘far too many choices going on here’ when offering toddler DD orange or blackcurrant squash.

MIL loves to tell me where I’m going wrong. She forgets her son was a VERY unruly teenager with no boundaries and her daughter is a fucking know-it-all righteous prick so she didn’t too great herself actually at bringing up kids.

Arrghhh Indian Mother not mother in law.

She’s going to freeze, followed by mad attempts to put my poor baby in knitted hat, mittens, and wrap her in three blankets even though the child was wearing a vest and babygrow and it was hot!

When will she get a brother, I was lying in bed in hospital having literally given birth and my fanny covered in stitches!

You need a son. 🙄

And then there was the you can’t leave the house for forty days post birth and nobody can take baby out the house either….

My mother is utterly crazy though.

@MissMissTorrance I'd forgotten that one!

" Don't they look the image of their Father... everyone says so"

My in-laws are obsessed with my DC looking like their dad and everything they do or say comes from their dad or a random family member, I joke to DH that I was just the incubator.

Ah the 'too many choices' one. My MIL says it often to me if I ask DC do they want X,Y or Z. 'Why are you giving them a choice. It's not necessary and you ate making your life more difficult by offering more than one thing' or 'Don't give them a choice, they'll start and be picky'.

Every time she sees DS1 she says 'Oh he's like his daddy' in this sentimental tone. He is but he was the last time she saw him and she said it then and says it every time and he hasn't changed at all.

She looks at DD and says 'Ooh she's wilful- reminds me of you' to me.

I just smile.

My MIL telephoned my mum to say what a lovely mum I had turned out to be (DD1 was a few weeks old at this point)... Which sounds a pleasant thing to do except she countered the compliment by saying she was surprised because she thought I would have been bloody awful at it. So that was nice.

My MIL - isn't he a good / clever boy? Nothing like you DH, must take after iklboo

I am aware she is rather in the minority!

My MIL who is genuinely lovely...has an obsession that DD2 takes after BIL.
My mother thinks she takes after me.

I reckon its typical Younger sibling behaviour!

I get on really well with my MIL and she is genuinely lovely, but she did this a few times when Dd1 was born. Every 'nice' attribute of her looks or character were from DH. I was never mentioned 😂 she redeemed herself by saying she hoped our kids got my brains though!

Favouring BIL or SIL's kids because they live closer - every time!

My MIL is correct that DS1 is the image of his dad. It annoys me she thinks ds2 is like his uncle, her own DS2. He's not. He's a mini version of my dad in looks and temperament. This isn't a good thing but it's the truth. So I get fed up of her saying "have you met uncles name"? Etc At everything ds2 does.

My mother in law was very disappointed that baby dd looks just like me.

She’s not asked after her in ten months.

Sores on older dd who looks just like her and dh.

*dotes, not sores