Mentoring: are you a mentor/mentee?

[dubyalass]

I'm a civil servant and would like to find a mentor, partly to look at ways to develop my skills and knowledge but also to help me see the bigger picture of what's possible and to help me change my attitude to work, get me out of my comfort zone, challenge myself more.

Are any of you mentors and/or mentees? What do you enjoy about it? How has it worked for you? How have you got the most out of the relationship? And crucially, how did you find the right person?

I'm interested in answers from anyone; you don't have to be a civil or public servant. I'd imagine there are some really successful mentorships across completely different industries.

I'm a mentor but for someone who works where I work and I was asked to do it by our manager. Not sure that's what you have in mind.

Thank you! Good to hear all experiences to work out what would work best for me.

I currently have a workplace mentor who is supporting me through a degree. I use them to keep me on track, I’m doing my dissertation at the moment and working on a weekly to do list which I share on a Friday and then send a progress update the following Friday. We have a monthly catch up too. It’s only been to this extent while doing the dissertation.

I’ve been approached by our organisational development team about being a mentor for someone starting the same degree in October. I’ve happily accepted.

For me, it’s about having a connection, an honest and open relationship and both sides getting something out of the relationship.

You mention wanting someone to help you get out on your comfort zone, is there someone in your workplace who inspires you, who you respect? My director was this for me, she realised I could do more and talked to me about my career. When I expressed a desire to be challenged, to progress she managed to include me in a project that she was involved in and put me forward for the degree. It’s a workplace apprenticeship. While I’ve been doing my degree, I have secured a promotion. She’s not officially a mentor but she saw something in me and pushed me in the right direction. I’m very grateful and work hard for her. Work for a local authority.

Is there someone like her in your workplace?

I have been a mentor a few times. Mostly it's been informal - someone I work with who is younger/junior than me and has come to me to ask for advice and over time the relationship has developed into a mentorship. That's the best variety. I've also been part of a volunteer mentoring programme where I've mentored underprivileged school children about their career choices/pathways. That's completely different but rewarding in a different way. For me it's about talking to people and problem solving. That's what I get out of it.

Thank you for replying! There will almost certainly be someone in my organisation but I need to do a bit of research as I'm fairly new and don't know who's who yet. We have a buddy system which works really well but I'd like something with goals that stretch me.

I'd be delighted to be a mentor myself. Working with underprivileged kids sounds fantastic. Something to think about.

Anyone else?

Hi there I used to think mentoring and networking is great but please be aware that there are companies out there that claim to do mentoring to develop your personality and skill sets but unfortunately they use tactics of coercive manipulation. LIG (Lighthouse International Group), Lighthouse Kidz, the Legends Network, bethechangeagency.org - avoid them. Professionals of all ages, students get sucked in because they actually care and due to our universal human response to group and situational pressures they don’t realize what is happening at which point coercive manipulation has disabled their critical thinking - Reddit has some good information on their high demand group tactics so please inform yourself!

I’m a mentor and a mentee. I found a mentor when I started my most recent job as it was a big step up and I wanted to speak to someone who had done something similar.

I’ve also been a mentor for a civil service social mobility programme, for a fast streamer and also for someone working at a think tank. I have also been a mentor for someone who needed a handhold going through a disciplinary and for someone who was working at an international organisation. All very different. Some are necessarily time limited, others, like the fast streamer, dip in and out.

I would say it works best if you know what you want to get out of it - eg the think tanker I mentored wanted to move on, but not sure what next, or what skills she would bring to a new job. The fast streamer wanted someone with civil service experience, and a bit of guidance (later) about what job she should go for on promotion.