Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Inheritance one. WWYD?

75 replies

Rewis · 03/07/2021 20:43

This is a what would you do question.

Grandmother passed away recently and while she was alive and getting her affairs in order she had put her life insurance £30k in the name of her 9 grandchildren. However, due to reasons it was changed in the name of her 3 children (reasons made complete sense and was reccomended by solicitor, insurance company etc. so it's all legit). She had let her children know non-directly that it has been intended for grandchildren but the children can do how they see fit.

Basically now all her children are getting £10k and they are discussing what they are doing with it. What would you do? Divide it equally to 9? The parent dividing equally to their kids so then each cousin would get different amount (fam1:3kids,fam2:4kids, fam3: 2kids)? Divide based on need? Something else?

There is no legalities involved in this or anything. I'm one of the grandchildren and I have a clear opion how I would do it. However, I'm keeping my opinion to myself and won't get involved and it will have no effect on any family relations and all is fine. I'm just curious.

OP posts:
ChicChaos · 03/07/2021 21:58

I would split it between her 3 children, I am wondering what a 'non-directly' way of letting her children know is because if it is one person that is saying that was her original intention, I'd be suspicious! I'd take was was written down as the intentions.

Rewis · 03/07/2021 21:59

Thank you for the responses. Very interesting to hear.

Unless you are the family with 2 - children - you have limited right to control of the situation and even then - cannot dictate what the other people do
I understand this and I have no interest in getting involved. My mother will decide how she sees fit even if it's nothing or my cousins getting less/more. It will all be good. Just general curiosisty.

Why did she change it?
It was reccomended due to the type of insurance it was, it would be more practical to divide between who were inheriting her instead of having different beneficieries. I'm not gonna get into it but it's legit advice.

she gave the instruction for her children to “do how they see fit” which, if that isn’t actually what she meant, is a recipe for discord and resentment.
I think she meant it. She decided to take the advice and let her children know how she had intended. She was not one to make demands and trusted her children to see what was best. There will not be discord or resentment.

Did the 3 children get anything else besides the 10k each?
Yes. There was a property and some cash/investments left. I'd guess it's about £65k each. Then there is this insurance on top of it.

How were funeral costs and any residual bills paid? Has the estate been settled and by whom? Has probate been granted?
Funeral costs, bills etc. are being paid from grandmothers account (cash). All leaglities have taken a wile due to covid and has been handled and her flat has been sold.

Would the grandchildren have all received the same amount if the life insurance policy had been (allowed to be) in their names
Yes, they would have.

OP posts:
Rewis · 03/07/2021 22:05

I am wondering what a 'non-directly' way of letting her children know is because if it is one person that is saying that was her original intention, I'd be suspicious! I'd take was was written down as the intentions.
She said to her 3 kids that she has paid for a life insurance and it has been put in her grandchildrens names. But due to reccomendation for reasons X she has put it in her childrens names and trusts them to do how they see fit. There is no drama to be expected. I just know that with the 3 siblings some are more concentrated on the original intention and others are on the how they see fit aspect. This won't be a problem at all now or in the future.

OP posts:
ChicChaos · 03/07/2021 22:07

Is it the sibling with 4 children that is more focused on the 'original' intention, by any chance?

Chloemol · 03/07/2021 22:09

So,it between the grandchildren, as she wished

saraclara · 03/07/2021 22:12

The grandchildren should come out this equally. It's screamingly obvious and I don't know why anyone would think differently. Especially when it had been her original intention.

Greenbks · 03/07/2021 22:13

Split 9 ways like she wanted it.

Gazelda · 03/07/2021 22:15

@saraclara

The grandchildren should come out this equally. It's screamingly obvious and I don't know why anyone would think differently. Especially when it had been her original intention.
I agree. I can't see why anyone would think it reasonable or in line with Grandma's wishes to do anything other than split it equally 9 ways.
Jabba2020 · 03/07/2021 22:16

Divide equally between the 9

Iwonder08 · 03/07/2021 22:16

Equally between all grandchildren

TooWicked · 03/07/2021 22:18

Grandmother's original intention to split the money between her 9 grandchildren was superceded by her legally making her 3 children the beneficiaries of the money and telling them to do "as they see fit".

As it is, none of the grandchildren may even end up with a penny of the money.

This is why having a will that is very clear, is so important.

TheFoundations · 03/07/2021 22:19

Would the grandchildren have all received the same amount if the life insurance policy had been (allowed to be) in their names

Yes, they would have

This was clearly grandmother's intention, then. I'd say to split it otherwise would be disrespectful of her clearly stated wishes.

amillionrosepetals · 03/07/2021 22:20

Another vote for each grandchild to get a 1/9th share. This is what Grandmother originally intended and the children have received a separate inheritance of their own.

MichelleScarn · 03/07/2021 22:24

But due to reccomendation for reasons X she has put it in her childrens names
What were reasons x and who gave them?

AliceLivesHere · 03/07/2021 22:24

I think it is sad when children are missed and grandchildren given it all. I have known several recent cases like this. Young grandson bought a car and holiday and had money for a deposit his parents rent. It feels wrong. Grandchildren given rather than actually having a go at working for their own things doesn't feel right.

SwimBaby · 03/07/2021 22:25

AliceLivesHere the DC are getting about 65k each.

godmum56 · 03/07/2021 22:25

Assuming there aren't other legacies, I would divide it equally between the families, not he grandchildren. It all gets a bit difficult otherwise IMO....the families with more childen will get more and it won't necessarily go to the children....somone has talked about better off and less well off families but then you get into judgement...should a less well off family with a nice house and car get more than a family with more savings but less stuff?
BUT you say there will be no discord and I hope you will be right....at rock bottom, I think you should do what will keep good feeling within the family

JetBlackSteed · 03/07/2021 22:31

I've sort of had this situation. My dad is dead and at her request (I'm her eldest) I accompanied my mum to her solicitor to rewrite her will. She wanted all assets split between her 8 grandkids. The solicitor said in my presence that she was being unfair to me as I have 1, brother 4 and sister 3. It rankles a bit tbf, but that's what she wants and I'll see it carried out.
We aren't talking a fortune or a large estate but it's me does everything for her with shopping and medical appointments etc.

Meredusoleil · 03/07/2021 22:31

50/50 between the kids. Then they should put the money in trust until the grandkids are of age and they get equal shares of their parents portion iyswim?

DinoHat · 03/07/2021 22:33

@Greenbks

Split 9 ways like she wanted it.
This. I don’t understand why it’s even up for debate. She made her intentions quite clear in her lifetime.
dancealittleclosertome · 03/07/2021 22:38

But all these grandchildren also have another set of grandparents. Some of those grandparents may be able to leave them a lot of money, and some may be unable to leave anything.

Meredusoleil · 03/07/2021 22:41

I don't see why the child that has more children should get a bigger share and the one that has less children should have a smaller share. But I do also see how splitting 9 ways is treating the grandkids equally. Its just missing out the kids that I don't agree with!

MarianneUnfaithful · 03/07/2021 22:49

Why couldn’t each of her children been left a share that reflected how many of the grandchildren they had?
1/3 , 2/9 and 4/9 of the fund respectively?

Optimist1 · 03/07/2021 22:50

Surely the Insurance company will be making equal payments to each of her children, since that's what the paperwork says? I don't think it would be paid into an executor's account.

If it's agreed that there should be an adjustment to reflect the number of grandchildren in each family, the family with two grandchildren would have to make a payment to the family with four grandchildren. This sounds like a recipe for discord to me.

saraclara · 03/07/2021 22:52

@Meredusoleil

I don't see why the child that has more children should get a bigger share and the one that has less children should have a smaller share. But I do also see how splitting 9 ways is treating the grandkids equally. Its just missing out the kids that I don't agree with!
It's only that insurance policy that the DGM's kids don't benefit from. They each get £65k in the will, so they should be giving their own kids the money that DGM expected them to have.