How many child free dates do you go on?

[Howcanthisbe123]

Hi all,

How many child free day/lunch/night/weekends away do you go on? And how frequently? Once a month, every week, every 6 months?

I’m just curious how much one on one time others spend with their loved one.

Well DH and I are in Costa while DD dances. Does that count?

Odd lunch date when younger, now they are older we occasionally leave them to go and see friends etc. Never gone away without them, I wouldn’t feel right taking a holiday and excluding them. We have plenty of alone time in the evenings.

We had our first night away after exactly 5 years and 9 months. We get an evening out on birthdays and our wedding anniversary. Occasionally the DC have a sleep over at grandparents, maybe a couple of times a year.

I think we've maybe had six or seven lunches together since DS1 was born three years ago, and never an evening meal. But I think it would have been different without Covid - we were just about to have our first night away together without him when the first lockdown was announced - and we now have a four month old too, so I think it'll be another year or so before we can. Having lunch just the two of us tomorrow though, which I'm very excited for!

Ds nearly 3 and I think DH and I have been on 3 or 4 dates since becoming parents DH was busy juggling uni studies with a demanding job for a decent chunk of this time and we were saving for our wedding, which is why it's been so infrequent.

We'd like to increase to 3 - 4 dates per year but it isn't possible until September (nursery fees related).

In the first 16 years (until youngest was 14) perhaps 20 times, got easier then and we went out more frequently but he then decided he wanted "something different" and left!

@hels71

Of course

Actually I didn't count the 60 minutes each weekend between dropping at orchestra and having to leave to fetch them, occasionally we would have brunch but mostly we did boring jobs like the b&q run as it was near orchestra

We go for a coffee just the two of us most weeks. Dinner, maybe every 3 months (requires babysitter). Night away, 1-2 per year.

My children are 6 and 4 and we very rarely go out together. Adding the cost of a babysitter on top of a night out seems hugely extravagant. We will occasionally go out for a pint in the day if my dad is visiting us (he lives a long way away). That's a couple of times a year.

Usually once a month that's been the case most of the time apart from 0-6 months when BF. Mum will often have the kids over night, I love having the whole evening and morning to ourselves, even if we don't specifically go out and do something. We try and get away for a weekend once or twice a year too. And kids go stay with family for a couple weeks in summer holidays so that's a good time for us to fit in some meals out etc!

Haven't been on one with dh in probably coming up to 2 years (COVID and all). We don't have family help and the past year and a half has meant it's not possible to have a babysitter in the house. Before that, we would ocassionally go for a lunch date while dc were in school/nursery.

Pre-dc2, who was still little enough when COVID came around, we used to go out for an evening meal once a month with a babysitter at home with dc1.

We've been away for a night or a weekend without dc maybe 2/3 times in 8 years. Again, we don't really have any family support, so it's really tough to arrange. It's mostly only paid help.

DS is 7 and has SEND. Have managed a couple of mini breaks thank you grandparents. But they live a long way away and are getting on in years, so it's a rarity.

Pre COVID would manage maybe 3 date nights per year, using babysitters. Since COVID had had nothing. 😕

That said, I do go on holiday usually twice a year without dh and dc because time alone to act like an adult is really important, even if it isn't a romantic weekend away together.

We used to go for nights out 2-3 times a year, and the occationally lunch whilst they are at nursery/school if we happen to be not too busy. Never really done weekends away without them but we did do one incredible weeks holiday alone! Since COVID, we’ve had no time alone other than evenings when they’re in bed.

@mindutopia

That said, I do go on holiday usually twice a year without dh and dc because time alone to act like an adult is really important, even if it isn't a romantic weekend away together.

Yes, we have very little alone time outside the house (quite a bit in it, though, because our children are so young they're in bed early) but we both have an evening out alone around once a week - mine is currently quite short, though, because it has to be fitted between feeds! I would like a few more date nights but can live with the current situation where it's a takeaway and a film rather than dinner out and the cinema, but I would really struggle if I didn't get my adult evenings out alone pretty regularly, and I did when that was the case during lockdowns.

Normally a weekend away and maybe 2/3 date nights a year. Sometimes do lunches while DC are at school.

We both get individual nights out and the odd weekend away with friends as well.

One night and week ds is with his dad and one night a week he stays my parents so twice a week? Although we don’t always go out on them. Plus he goes to his dads 4 weeks if the holidays (usually 1 week Easter, 2 weeks summer hols and October half term).

Then my parents take him away for a week every year and I have a few full weekends away a year! So I have loads of time, I understand how lucky I am and DS loves having all that time with his grandparents/dad

About once a week. Even if it's just to the pub for a couple hours.

At least once a month (obviously during COVID that might just have been a night in together rather than going out for dinner with a soft drink before 8pm 🙄) and probably a couple of hotel stays a year too. Even if it's just a night out, the boys stay overnight with grandparents. During the summer holidays they'll stay overnight every Sunday as grandparents will look after them on a Monday while we work (they're 6 and 3).

It wasn't really until the DC were 2 and 4 that we made a bigger push for more date nights. We were going out one evening/Saturday afternoon a month alone, alternating between my parents and SIL. Obviously that's gone to shit with covid.

DH has days off in the week and I will finish early or use leave so we have a cheeky lunch out, bit of time alone etc while the kids are in school.

I think it would have to be a really special occasion for me to feel happy leaving them for a whole weekend or week away.

I normally get about 4 hours off a year to go for a meal.

Every Wednesday night, once the kids are in bed, DH and I go out. It’s the highlight of my week and a great chance for us to catch up with each other. Sometimes we get dressed up and go somewhere fancy for dinner, other times we go out with another couple and some times we wear trackies and go to the cinema and watch something rubbish.

About 4 times a year, we go away to a relatively local, fancy spa hotel for 24-36 hours.

Kids are 3 and 5 and we live overseas with no family to help out. However we have a full time nanny and part of her contract is one evening per week. For the weekends away, we pay her overtime.

No family in the U.K. but had a babysitter booked for once a month. As they got older my family would collect them for the weekend so we could go away.

Child free?! What’s that?! I haven’t had a night without my children in FIVE years, I’m a lone parent and means I can’t even date because I’m always with my children 24/7

We’ve had 3 in 3 years 😂.