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Original poster

Offered a job abroad

24 replies

Studiodoll · 03/07/2021 08:48

My apologies if this is not the right place to post. I have been offered a job in Spain and not sure what to do. I am early 40s,married and gave 3dc,aged 9,11 and 13. I have been a regular visitor to Spain for the last 6 years as my Aunt owns a home there. I spend 6 weeks there in the summer and whenever the children are on holidays from school. I have got to know people over there and really love it. One of the people I have met is a businessman from the same country as myself. He has a great portfolio of businesses, pubs, restaurants, golf society, rentals etc and he has offered me the position of office manager. It seems crazy to even write this but I would love to go for it. I have always worked around my children so as DH could pursue his career. He is now very successful in his field and will more than likely continue to go higher and higher. The position comes with an apartment with pool and contribution towards the children private school fees. I have spoke to DH and he just laughed and said "but you live here" and what about the children? My DH and I do have a good relationship but I feel I've always been in his shadow. He was offered a position abroad a few years ago and there was never any real conversation between us about him not going. It was just a given that he would. Am I bring totally unreasonable and unrealistic to pursue this? I'm ready for the backlash.

OP posts:

mindutopia · 03/07/2021 09:03

I have worked abroad, not since having dc though. The thing about taking a job abroad is that you either do it for the adventure or you do it because there are no job options where you live. Personally, I wouldn't take a job abroad as an office manager, as that's a job you could easily get here, if you tried. It sounds like it's more for the fun and adventure of living somewhere else. That's fine, but that's hard to do with children and you have to both be on board.

I'm all for supporting each others careers and dh has supported mine, which involves considerable travel and time away. But that's because I can't work in my field locally. If I wanted to move us away, it would have to be really special and something that would be really beneficial to us as a family (financially, in terms of experiences, etc.) and dh would obviously need to be able to move and get a comparable job locally. Would your dh be able to do that?

Original poster

Studiodoll · 03/07/2021 09:16

@mindutopia,thank you for replying. I could get a job where I live but the cost of childcare would outweigh my earnings. My DH and I had always planned to retire to Spain and gave in the past talked about moving there and working. The position I've been offered would be more flexible than a position locally. Yes, it probably is more about a change of scenery and a new adventure. My DH could definately get a job in Spain but his earnings would be significantly less than they are now,thats not to say though that it would put him of moving. I've just felt restless for a while and Covid has put everything into perspective really. I wouldn't be leaving behind a support system, family in my own country.

OP posts:

Mydogisagentleman · 03/07/2021 09:21

The contribution towards schooling would concern me more than anything.
We lived abroad for 14 years in various countries. DD lays for a free place at DH school where he taught.
We chose to come back to the uk when she was 12 to avoid overseas student fees at university and, to enable her to do GCSEs rather r than baccalaureate.
I would think very carefully before making a decision.

Mydogisagentleman · 03/07/2021 09:22

The point was, fees at a decent international school can be astronomical.
Also, don’t forget the medical insurance.

Original poster

Studiodoll · 03/07/2021 09:27

I have looked into the school fees as this is very important. He has offered to pay half for each child and I also get a family discount because there are three children. The fees worked out at circa 5k per year for all three children. At the moment I am paying more for education in my own country per year.

OP posts:

Hoppinggreen · 03/07/2021 09:31

Presumably you are an EU citizen so you can live and work in Spain?
It does sound great but your DH and DC need to be onboard with it too.
We have a house in Spain and plan to be here permanently in 10 years or so but both me and DH agree and the kids will be old enough to decide whether to come or not

Aiguablava · 03/07/2021 09:32

Have you checked that you and your family meet the visa requirements? I'm not too familiar with the working visa requirements but office manager is not a position that would typically qualify easily. Then you would have to look at getting a working visa too gor your husband if the idea is for him to join you and work in spain.

I too would probably get excited about the offer but once you look in to the practicalities you may find it becomes less attractive. I have heard that the spanish authorities are a bit overwhelmed with all the Brexit related changes and it may take longer for your work permit to come through.

Original poster

Studiodoll · 03/07/2021 09:38

I am an EU citizen so I can work in Spain.I think DH was just a bit shocked at first but I can see him definately coming on board with it. I haven't spoke to dc yet, obviously they love their holidays in Spain but that's different to actually living there and attending school. I do feel that it would be a good opportunity for them to experience.

OP posts:

Aiguablava · 05/07/2021 06:11

Being an EU citizen makes it easier but doesn't mean you can just turn up and start working. Before you are legally able to work you will definitely need a NIE and a social security number and you will also have to start the residency process to get a residency certificate which is needed for opening a bank account, setting up gas and electric and phone contracts etc. Depending on which office is dealing with these things it can take months until eveything come through.

Have you check the school has space for all of your children? You should also check what documents you will need to enrol them. They may accept just a temporary NIE or they might want a reidency certificate which will take longer to get.

UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 05/07/2021 06:28

Reading your opening post my first thought was I'd be very sceptical about this job offer. It sounds a bit "too good to be true" with those perks for an office manager, given experienced bilingual office managers would be very easy to recruit locally and pay a fairly modest salary without any private school fees or luxury accommodation! Unemployment is fairly high in Spain and office management is not a shortage occupation!

Something smells "off". Could this acquaintance be trying to start an affair with you?

BTW as you mentioned not being sure where to post - there's a living overseas board if you wanted to post on a specific board, but I'm sure chat is completely appropriate too!

Letsallscreamatthesistene · 05/07/2021 06:46

What job is it?

MayorGundersonsDogRufus · 05/07/2021 06:55

It's very exciting OP, and I'm all for a bit of adventure (I currently live in Spain after following my own desire for adventure - with DC), but there is some good advice on this thread - do your homework and make sure everything seems legit with this job offer. Is there a contract you can review? Don't cut corners or avoid asking the important questions just to be polite. How's your Spanish? Spanish red tape can be a nightmare, utilities are expensive and requirements are different based on which part of the country you're in so it can be hard to get good advice. If you can line everything up, then I think you'll regret not doing it, but if something doesn't stack up you could be setting yourself up for a lot of challenges.

UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 05/07/2021 06:55

Letsallscreamatthesistene it says office manager in the opening post.

That's why I think the OP needs to be very wary and sceptical about how genuine the offer is. It is absolutely not a difficult to recruit for skill set, and there is no reason to offer private school fees and free accommodation to tempt an office manager to relocate when one could very easily be recruited locally.

Polkadots2021 · 05/07/2021 06:57

Im all for an adventure, but I'd say no, because as another poster has mentioned, it does sound a bit too good to be true. Also if it fell through or you didn't like it, what then? It's likely it'd be hard to get another similar paid role with any private school fee contribution, so then you'd be in Spain, 3DCs in schools you might not be able to pay for & difficulties finding work. The dream might become something more miserable then. I'd also be circumspect why this man is offering all this when as others have said, it's not a hard role to fill by locals.

I just think the down side is too much of a risk - however, it could be an amazing way to set a plan instead to work out how in a few years when the kids are a bit older you and your husband could try to plan a move out to Spain to live, when you are not completely reliant on one job offer that may or may not work out.

Letsallscreamatthesistene · 05/07/2021 07:09

Oh I see, I missed it. Tbh OP im not sure id disrupt the whole family for an office managers position. Id only be able to justify it if, a) it was a unique opportunity that was unlikely to come about anywhere else and, b) it would mean that you would be the higher earner of the family

AbsolutelyPatsy · 05/07/2021 07:17

is it all English speaking?
or can you speak spanish.

i know of someone who went who faced language difficulties. she sunk a lot into it and now rents flat back in the uk

PurpleSlate · 05/07/2021 07:25

Being an EU citizen makes it easier but doesn't mean you can just turn up and start working.

Um... didn't we leave the EU?

You know, Brexit n all?

FlowerArranger · 05/07/2021 07:28

I agree with PPS who wonder how genuine this offer of an office manager position really is. It does sound a bit too good to be true.

Also, given that your DC are aged 9,11 and 13, you need to think ahead. 13 is a crucial age to disrupt education - BTDT and wouldn't recommend it. Quite apart from the fact that he/she is just 5 years from uni, so that's something to really think about. If returning to the UK for uni is in your/their plans, bear in mind that they need to be resident for 3 years to avoid international fees. Not sure about eligibility for loans but that's another issue to look into.

MareMare · 05/07/2021 07:40

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme

Something smells "off". Could this acquaintance be trying to start an affair with you?

BTW as you mentioned not being sure where to post - there's a living overseas board if you wanted to post on a specific board, but I'm sure chat is completely appropriate too!

Exactly this. Objectively, why would this man want to import, more expensively, an overseas mother of three who only spends holidays in Spain and have to contribute to her children’s education, house her family etc, when he should be able to fill the same position locally and more cheaply?

Topseyt · 05/07/2021 07:44

What on earth is stopping him from recruiting an office manager locally? He seems to be going all out to get you. Flattering though it may be, it would make me wary.

I'd be rather wary too of moving children of the ages yours are (particularly the 13 year old) and disrupting education and friendship groups.

I'm unsure how the residency and working visas work, though as you are already an EU citizen (a status we just lost due to Brexshit).

Good luck whatever you decide.

MartyHart · 05/07/2021 07:46

@PurpleSlate the op has stated she is an EU citizen

Topseyt · 05/07/2021 07:50

@PurpleSlate

Being an EU citizen makes it easier but doesn't mean you can just turn up and start working.

Um... didn't we leave the EU?

You know, Brexit n all?

Ignorant post

You do realise that there are still EU citizens living and working in the UK, don't you? Some married to British citizens?

OP sounds as though she is one of those people.

MegaCityOne · 05/07/2021 08:06

I’d also be wary of the offer: if the children were younger I’d give it a go, even for 12 months as an amazing experience, but I wouldn’t move a 13 year old. We have an opportunity to emigrate but we won’t look until DS1 is 18.

AbsolutelyPatsy · 05/07/2021 08:56

as said above, you would run into difficulties with university, if your dc wanted to come to university in the uk

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