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But HOW do I give up breastfeeding for a milk-obsessed toddler? Pls help!!

58 replies

ShirleyPhallus · 30/06/2021 20:29

My DD is 15 months old and still feeding morning and night. I’m ready to give up now, she’s bitey, wriggly, kicks me, pulls at my skin and it’s basically feeling like a form of slow torture at this point.

But she really loves it. She’s at the point of pulling at my top and won’t drink ANY milk from a cup or a bottle. No to milkshakes, custard etc. I’ve tried giving her new quick or vanilla milk and she spits it out. She also won’t eat yoghurt or cereal or porridge either.

She will eat cheese so I think that’s probably fine from a calcium perspective? But I need some help on actually giving up the feeds. She started nursery a few months ago and since then has had endless colds and bugs which are disrupting her sleep. I’ve cut down a few nights in a row and DH has put her straight to bed when I’ve been out and she’s been ok, but it’s a bit hit and miss as to how she sleeps. If there even is a link between it.

What do I do? Should I just cut down the minutes then drop it entirely? Or go cold turkey and get DH to put her to bed for a week?

Pls send help! I’m starting to be envious of everyone who stopped feeding before their child could really demand it!

OP posts:
GlumyGloomer · 01/07/2021 10:44

Personally I'm too scared of mastitis to go cold turkey from feeding often. With dd1 I weaned her off at 2, and it took a couple of months. Decide when you want to feed, stick ridgedly to that schedule then drop one at a time. I found weak lukewarm hot chocolate was the best transitional drink, then reduce the quantity of chocolate powder each time until it's just milk.
Dd2 is more boob obsessed, so I'm anticipating this time being harder. I've night weaned already but she still feeds a lot in the day for comfort. There are likley to be a lot of tantrums on the first few days of restricting, but I know that she will get used to it. Clothing that prevents access is definitely a useful tool, as are plenty of snacks for distraction. Good luck, whichever way you decide to go.

Zarene · 01/07/2021 11:54

I've just stopped with DD18 months.

It was hurting so much I was sobbing after every feed, and I would have felt like absolute shit if anyone had suggested I should continue, sorry you've had to deal with that here OP.

I cut down to one feed a day over the course of a week, then went cold turkey. We had one day of a very cross toddler (I did it on a day when DH could take the brunt of this), one day of her being a bit grumpy, and since then she's been fine.

I did plasters on nipples more to make it easier for me to stay strong rather than deterring DD. It wasn't totally comfortable, but it was better than feeding!

It's been about 10 days now and it's been a lovely change in my relationship with DD - since stopping I've realised how fear of pain from feeding was making me tense around her.

Shirleyphallus · 13/08/2021 18:12

Just wanted to come back to this thread to thank everyone for their advice.

In the end, I cut down to just the morning feed and DH did most of the bedtimes, then after 5/6 days I started doing them too with cuddles and a cup of water. Then with the morning one, about a week later, she cut herself down to about 2 mins one morning so I decided to just stop it the next day.

She only asked for it once, and that was that! So I thought she was totally obsessed with it but actually gave it up quite easily in the end.

Thanks for all the advice and support on this thread

OP posts:

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ShirleyPhallus · 13/08/2021 18:14

No idea why I’m not showing as the author of the thread there?!

OP posts:
Viviennemary · 13/08/2021 18:17

Every time they bite you are meant to withdraw the breast and say no. If that didnt work I would just stop altogether. I couldn't be a martyr to it.

Yogamummy23 · 13/08/2021 18:30

Depending on how much they feed currently just watch out for mastitis. I got it when cutting my 18month olds morning and evening feeds out having not had it at all throughout our whole journey! Good luck, it’s tough but mine got the message in 3 days I think.

Shirleyphallus · 13/08/2021 22:17

@Viviennemary

Every time they bite you are meant to withdraw the breast and say no. If that didnt work I would just stop altogether. I couldn't be a martyr to it.
I love it when people read the full thread. It’s literally only 2 pages.

I haven’t been a martyr Confused

OP posts:
Panickingpavlova · 13/08/2021 22:27

I did gradual withdraw Andy then stopped after she went to stay with gp for a weekend.
She did miss it though its not just the milk, it's the comfort.

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