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Would you go and have lunch alone?

157 replies

FloraFoxtrots · 29/06/2021 10:24

And if not, why not?

I'm going out today to have lunch on my own. Have a workman here and want to just concentrate on a couple of emails and err Mumsnet a bit maybe Grin

I mentioned it to a friend and she was horrified (slightly exaggerating there) that I'd sit there like a right old saddo on my own, eating. It's nowhere posh - think along the lines of a generic chain restaurant

So - would you take yourself off and have lunch on your own?

OP posts:
MarmaladeToastAndAMarmaladeCat · 29/06/2021 13:18

Absolutely. I’m doing it right now. Not technically alone as I have a sleeping toddler in the pram next to me but I’m eating by myself anyway.

Peanutbuttercupisyum · 29/06/2021 13:20

Most people do this regularly I would have thought!! You need lunch, nothing in the house or at work, off you pootle to the nearest cafe or whatever and get yourself something to eat and sit down for 40 mins! I probably do this twice a week!

Spottybluepyjamas · 29/06/2021 13:25

Absolutely! I love doing this. Glass of wine and a good book in peace - what a treat!

EmmaJR1 · 29/06/2021 13:55

Did it today.

Life is so full of people that sometimes I need to have 5 minutes and meal by myself. It's glorious!

Prettypennies · 29/06/2021 14:28

It’s up there with ordering a takeaway for yourself when you’re home alone 😍

FloraFoxtrots · 29/06/2021 16:32

@MayIDestroyYou ha ha. I'll probably not ditch a friendship of 30 years plus because she called me a fucking saddo. She's called me far worse over the years

And nothing to do with a man. You're possibly doing a spot of projection there

OP posts:
FloraFoxtrots · 29/06/2021 16:34

For some of these responses are PEAK MUMSNET and completely mental. A throwaway remark from an old pal of mine and we have the likes of @MayIDestroyYou vying for the winning spot for the weirdest comment on the thread.

Anyway - I enjoyed my lunch and it's been interesting to read - most - of the responses

OP posts:
MrsClatterbuck · 29/06/2021 16:38

Wish I had a tenner for everytime I have had lunch alone also sometimes have a coffee alone. It's lovely to chill out with a couple of coffees and spend a little time on my tablet really mumsnetting
I also have lunch and breakfast out with DH as well but there's nothing sad about doing it on my own.

Lampzade · 29/06/2021 16:41

I do it all the time.
Love it

bishbashbosh99 · 29/06/2021 16:43

Oh I love doing this. If I have a hospital appointment I even get excited at sitting in the hospital cafe alone

Needhelp101 · 29/06/2021 16:43

I'm also baffled that anyone would NOT do this.

I once went out for dinner alone and was happily reading my paper when it very, very slowly dawned on me that every single other table in the restaurant was occupied by gooey-eyed couples.

It was Valentine's Day.

The waiter obviously felt so sorry for me that he gave me a little present as I was leaving 😁

Weepingwillows12 · 29/06/2021 16:48

I love it. I used to do it a lot when I worked in a city centre office. Strangely in my 20s I used to feel a bit awkward having an evening meal alone as i worried people were judging me. Had to work away sometimes so it was room service or eat out and I got bored of room service mediocre food.

Now happy to do it. Good book, bit of people watching, glass of wine. Heaven. Cant wait to be allowed back travelling for work.

Maybe your friend just hasnt realised the pleasure of it yet....

HappydaysArehere · 29/06/2021 16:56

Brilliant idea. Go for it.

FinallyHere · 29/06/2021 17:05

Why would you not have lunch if you wanted something to eat and happened to be by yourself?

I got used to it when I travelled a lot for work. Often I would team up with colleagues for lunch and/or dinner but occasionally I just needed time to myself.

Enjoy.

It may be a hangover from school and home's disapproval of 'eating in the street', that is exactly why I wouldn't walk along eating or drinking.

Maireas · 29/06/2021 17:08

@FloraFoxtrots

For some of these responses are PEAK MUMSNET and completely mental. A throwaway remark from an old pal of mine and we have the likes of *@MayIDestroyYou* vying for the winning spot for the weirdest comment on the thread.

Anyway - I enjoyed my lunch and it's been interesting to read - most - of the responses

If it was a throw away remark, why frame a complete thread around it and ask for responses?
Maireas · 29/06/2021 17:09

I'm glad you went and had a nice lunch!
Like others on here, I do it often and love it!

FloraFoxtrots · 29/06/2021 17:09

@Maireas dunno. Why don't you psychoanalyse me and the thread and why I might have posted and what it could possibly all mean? Hmm

OP posts:
Maireas · 29/06/2021 17:16

[quote FloraFoxtrots]@Maireas dunno. Why don't you psychoanalyse me and the thread and why I might have posted and what it could possibly all mean? Hmm[/quote]
Ok. I come in peace Smile. Are you feeling attacked? I think people are on your side. It was a perfectly reasonable query and folks have responded. Don't get upset or anxious about it, it's really not worth it. Wine (no emoji for lunch!)

3Britnee · 29/06/2021 17:37

I would do it at work, and I've gone to fast food places outside of work, but I wouldn't go to a proper restaurant unless it was a work lunchtime. Like I wouldn't just randomly go out for dinner to tgi's even, say, on my own. I'd get takeaway though.

Graphista · 29/06/2021 17:41

Been single almost 18 years and I'm unemployed due to disability, currently housebound but when I'm not - of course! My friends are often busy at work or with their partner/spouse and families etc I do stuff with them too, but if they're not available or don't fancy the film/show/act I do then I go alone

I don't understand why people think it odd - although I've noticed this is most often applied to WOMEN eating out alone, people generally don't think it strange if men do so

My mother was horrified initially at me dating to enter a pub alone! Grin apparently it's not ladylike!

I find it weird when people are uncomfortable in their own company.

Definitely

I go to public lectures, museums, art galleries, cinema, theatre, comedy clubs... all on my own some as I'm a big girl and I can!

I'd feel all self conscious and I honestly believe that most people would too I think this thread proves you wrong

One of the great benefits of getting older op is not giving a fuck what others think about things that are none of their business!

If I take my teen children for a sports thing somewhere I'll tuck myself into a cafe and enjoy lots of caffeine and a good book.

Yep! When dd was in the clubs/sports/afternoon shopping with friends somewhere too far for her to get to alone but once she was there with friends she was fine phase I'd drop her off at whatever and head to nearest lovely cafe/restaurant for at least a cuppa abs a chill out if not a full meal. I discovered some fantastic places to eat this way I wouldn't otherwise have come across, the staff got to know me and became more welcoming etc I even got a few freebies!

It isn't that the friend is uncomfortable in her own company - it's that she believes women have no value unless accompanied by a man; so to be seen in public alone (unless for exceptional business reasons) outs a woman as chronically undesirable.

Hmm I agree with the latter part but I think it's WHY the friends feels uncomfortable at the thought of doing so - even if they don't consciously realise this

Josette77 · 29/06/2021 17:54

I love eating on my own. Why is that brave? When I ear out with people I don't look around and judge those on their own.
One a year I take myself on a fancy date. I see a play, go for a posh meal, get all dresses up. I love it.

Arrierttyclock · 29/06/2021 17:56

I love doing this. I just take a book and relax. Might do it this week actually!

Anniissa · 29/06/2021 18:06

I love a good solo lunch (or breakfast or dinner) with a good book and a glass of wine or two (*not at breakfast...unless it’s a Bloody Mary which apparently is acceptable morning drinking Smile) and opportunities for people watching. I love eating out with other people too but it can feel quite decadent not having to fit around other people’s wants. I’m also partial to a solo cinema trip or a night alone at a posh hotel enjoying the spa and room service.

Guavafish · 29/06/2021 18:08

It’s actually nice! Time to think!

MaBroon21 · 29/06/2021 18:12

I don’t let being alone prevent me from doing anything.