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Original poster

Blended families..sharing a bedroom

12 replies

Blended87 · 28/06/2021 14:43

I've just out found I am pregnant. Have been with my partner for 3 years. He is great. Very happy together and he is great with my kids. We are living together. Kids stay down their dad's 2/3 nights a week and we are happily coming parenting together with no major issues as of yet. My worry is one of them will have to share a bedroom. I have a 9 year old son and 7 year old girl. I will keep the baby in my room for the first 6 months which I did with them both. But I'm worried they will feel like it's not their room when they come back to mine. It's really playing on my mind. The area we are in is quite expensive and I don't believe I would be able to afford a 4 bedroom house. Anyone else been in this situation before?

OP posts:
TooMuchPaper · 28/06/2021 14:48

That's a tricky one. You may end up having to keep the baby in your room for longer than 6 months if it turns out to be a wakeful or non-sleeping baby. Are you renting or do you own the property you are in?

Original poster
Blended87 · 28/06/2021 14:51

Currently renting. I know..that's what I thought. I'm in two mind about the pregnancy . I did always one another one but when I was more prepared. The timing seems to be wrong but a part of me is over the moon to be pregnant after suffering a few miscarriages years ago.

OP posts:
Yepyes · 28/06/2021 14:53

I had to share with my baby brother at age 7/8

I hated it, I felt really resentful.

It was a horrible experience

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Thebookswereherfriends · 28/06/2021 14:57

Is there any scope for partitioning one of the bedrooms to make 2 smaller rooms?

EmmaGrundyForPM · 28/06/2021 14:57

This isn't meant nastily, but did you not consider this before you and your dp started trying for a baby? I don't see this as a "blended families" issue as you would be in the same position re bedrooms if your dp was the father of all the children.

I think you need to plan for another bedroom. Kids sharing is fine if close in age and, if older, same sex, but it's not fair to expect a 13 year old to share with a 2 year old which is what you might be faced with.

If you can't move, is there some way you can extend or split the largest bedroom into two? Last resort would be to keep baby in with you for the first 2 or 3 years then you and dp sleep on a sofa bed downstairs, baby stays in the largest room but you keep all your clothes etc in there as well.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 28/06/2021 14:59

Sorry, just seen you're renting which makes it trickier. I think you need to keep baby in your room for the first couple of years but keep an eye out for a property which better suits your family. Maybe a 3 bed with a separate dining room which could become a bedroom for your oldest?

Congratulations on your pregnancy by the way

CiaoForNiao · 28/06/2021 15:06

I shared with my step sister when she slept at ours (7 year age gap). My brother and step brother shared (also 7 year age gap).
It was fine.
Siblings share rooms. My 2 shared a room until they were 13 and 15.

Original poster
Blended87 · 28/06/2021 15:08

@EmmaGrundyForPM

This isn't meant nastily, but did you not consider this before you and your dp started trying for a baby? I don't see this as a "blended families" issue as you would be in the same position re bedrooms if your dp was the father of all the children.

I think you need to plan for another bedroom. Kids sharing is fine if close in age and, if older, same sex, but it's not fair to expect a 13 year old to share with a 2 year old which is what you might be faced with.

If you can't move, is there some way you can extend or split the largest bedroom into two? Last resort would be to keep baby in with you for the first 2 or 3 years then you and dp sleep on a sofa bed downstairs, baby stays in the largest room but you keep all your clothes etc in there as well.

Hi have not taken nastily. I'm currently on the pill. This is my first pregnancy with my partner. The previous pregnancies were with my ex and one of the reasons our relationship sadly broke down. I will be keeping an eye out for affordable 4 bedroom houses.
OP posts:
FurryMcFlurry · 28/06/2021 15:08

I think let the baby sleep in your room for longer, even when baby is a bit older could you fit a wee toddler bed in?

Let the older kids have their respective bedrooms. However, your boy or girl may be happy to share with a toddler. My DD 8 shares a room with younger DD2 and enjoys it x

Original poster
Blended87 · 28/06/2021 15:09

Thanks everyone. The selfish part of me is happy but I'm an over thinker and already worried that my two children will hate me for this. Sound silly saying it on here but it's the way my brain works

OP posts:
ElderMillennial · 28/06/2021 15:10

The area we are in is quite expensive and I don't believe I would be able to afford a 4 bedroom house

Then you could move to a different area where a 4 bedroom house would cost less to rent?

I agree this is not really a blended families issue. You have two children and a third on the way with insufficient space.

blahblahblah321 · 28/06/2021 15:14

Any chance of converting a dining room? Or splitting the largest bedroom in two with a fake partition?

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