Help with 11.5 mo dd dropping feeds

[Hideandseek83]

I've posted before about my 11.5 mo DD. I'm trying to wean her off milk feeds but finding this stage really tough. For context she was formula fed since 4 months and EBF before that. I've got her into cows milk ok but reducing the amount has resulted in major tears. Up until now she's been having a bottle before her two day naps and before bed. Following advice on here I swapped to a cup for the lunch one, with the aim of also swapping the morning one to cup too. But the she found the cup frustrating as she's still not great at drinking from it and she clearly couldn't get enough milk. She sobbed and I felt really bad, as if I'm stopping her feeding.

Has anyone else had this? I don't know how best to move forward as I don't like seeing her get so upset. I think she's had lovely comfort and bonding from the bottle feeds and cuddles before her naps so the adjustment is hard and perhaps she feels I'm rejecting her?

Help! What do I do next?

Also just to add she eats really well.

I know the advice is to drop the bottle at 12 months but I personally always found that too young.
They are still babies.

Is it effecting her food intake?

What is the issue that made you post the last time?

Sorry, I've missed why she needs to stop having milk?

No she eats loads! But health visitor, NHS guidance and basically everywhere says she should be on 1 cup of milk at bed by 12 months. No bottles and no day feeds.

Also @NuffSaidSam the 3 bottles would add up to too much milk overall. When I tried to reduce quantity in bottle she cried. Advice was switch to cup and she'll drink less, but she gets so upset.

@Hideandseek83

No she eats loads! But health visitor, NHS guidance and basically everywhere says she should be on 1 cup of milk at bed by 12 months. No bottles and no day feeds.

In the real world most people sensibly realise that having a bottle after 1 is totally fine. Some children like the routine and familiarity of a bottle but they will learn to use a cup eventually.

As long as its not affecting her food intake and you're brushing her teeth I honestly wouldn't make this the hill to die on. She's still a baby and having a bottle is honestly not the end of the world.

And what will happen to her if she has 'too much' milk overall?

Also, if its cow's milk, it's not a feed. It's a drink. She's not having day feeds, she's having a day drink. Of milk.

And she should be having formula until 12 months anyway!

I think you've been given some bad advice op.

I'm really confused now. I posted the other day on here and no-one said the advice was wrong. Also it says so on the NHS website?

@Hideandseek83

I'm really confused now. I posted the other day on here and no-one said the advice was wrong. Also it says so on the NHS website?

Just because it's recommended doesn't mean that everyone does it bang on 12 months. Most children still have a bottle after 12 months of age with cows milk instead of formula. This is totally normal.

Don't forget OP that if she were bf you would have no idea how much milk she was drinking.
The recommendation when my DC were babies many years ago was a pint of milf a day at one year old.
All of these are recommendations and not rules don't forget. If she is eating well I am bot sure what you would need to worry about

I think you have to remember that the advice is generalised guidance. You have to adapt it to your situation.

So, you have a baby who is thriving with the milk, she eats well, she gets comfort from the bottles.

When you stop the bottles, she cries and is upset.

Ignoring the 'advice' what do you think you should do? What's your instinct say?

(Also, I've never seen advice that says babies should be weaned from formula before 12 months. Maybe that's new. Can you link?)

I work in a baby room in a nursery and there is so many over ones that still have bottles and some still on formula so it's honestly not a big deal

Think I might've seen/been on your other thread. The advice all applied if you want to move towards a cup of cows milk, but if she's not ready yet then she's not ready.

Thanks @MindyStClaire

Another poster on that thread said that a baby if this age should not still be using bottles.

It's so confusing!

I don't think a 1 year old needs bottles but surely you can wean her off them a bit gradually instead of going straight to a cup. What about a straw cup? What does she drink her water out of?

My DD had bottles until she was 2, she flat out refused to use a cup.

She'll be 7 at the end of July and is happy and healthy, and can use a cup. 11 months is so little, don't stress it, my DD got it from the cup eventually. And she wasn't the only one, in her Nursery class of 12 there was still 2 or 3 using bottles in Pre-school, they all came off them by the time they started school though.

@Hideandseek83

No she eats loads! But health visitor, NHS guidance and basically everywhere says she should be on 1 cup of milk at bed by 12 months. No bottles and no day feeds.

Yeah I thought it would be your HV.

I do this job too, and I give that information too.

But it isn't an exact science for every baby, and it isn't always simple and it is just a guideline.

I used this transition cup for my DS it has a soft spout like a bottle but is a free flow teat.
He wouldn’t drink his milk from a cup but would take it from this.
He is 18 months and will now drink his milk from a straw cup but only just recently.
I don’t think many 1 year olds are ready to give up the bottle very easily despite what the NHS might have you believe.

@Hideandseek83

Thanks *@MindyStClaire*

Another poster on that thread said that a baby if this age should not still be using bottles.

It's so confusing!

Neither of mine ever took a bloody bottle, so this isn't a battle I've had to have, but I think it's more a case of being aware. You don't want a three year old falling asleep with a bottle in their mouth and the milk pooling on their teeth, but if a 12 month old needs it a little longer that's ok. A few months is a long time at this age, just try again a little further down the line.