What is a good compromise here? DH related

[lookingforno]

DS is autistic and wakes around 4/4.30am. Sometimes as early as 3am.

I'm pregnant and the general nausea and tiredness is making me feel a bit stabby! I'm irritable and feel so sick it's horrendous. But I'm only 5.5 weeks!

What would be a reasonable arrangement so I can get more rest? We usually take it in turns to get up with him but recently he's not been sticking to it that well, with me in the first instance getting up to go and settle with with telly and a juice etc. He's a fucked to get out of bed and just seems to ignore me, but claims he's half asleep so didn't realise

Whereas when it's my turn, I take him downstairs and do the above alone. I can go on like this, I feel awful. But H in a bit of disbelief really since I'm so early.

I've been pregnant a lot before (sadly no babies after all that), and I've never ever been so unwell. And so early too

It's important to keep in mind that DS goes to nursery 3 days a week, 8.30am to 5pm. So I have time to rest up then a bit. But the summer holidays are coming up and he won't be going - Plus, he starts special needs school in September and will just be doing 9am to 12pm I don't know how I'll cope

What would you do?

I feel for you. My daughter is ASD and when she was young she'd be up at 4am on the dot everyday. Because my husband drives a lot for his job it would be me getting up with her so he'd get his sleep. Our daughter was hard to settle too so she wouldn't actually get to sleep till about 12 and there's no way I was coping in 4 hours sleep a night. I was literally about to have a breakdown at one point.

So we had to find a compromise. I'd go to bed early at 8pm and husband would stay up with her then settle her. Then he'd get into bed at 11ish. Then I'd get up with her at 4am so he could carry on sleeping till 7am. Meant I got my 8 hours and so did he. Weekends we'd both stay up and go to bed at 11 and then he'd sleep in on the Saturday morning and I'd get the Sunday lie in.

We've had a bit of a break through in recent years with sleep. Our daughter was prescribed melatonin to help with her sleep and she's now sleeping 11 till 6! Hurrah!!!! We still get the odd 4am starts but not very often thankfully.

Best of luck x

Assuming you're not working then I'd say you should be doing the early mornings on the days DS goes to nursery, you can have a really long nap to catch up. DH should do weekends and have a nap in the afternoon if needed. Then you've only got two rough days in the week to get through.

Holidays and once school starts would be harder but hopefully you'll feel a bit better once out of the first trimester. Will DS move up to full days eventually?

He is on melatonin too this is with it unfortunately

He will eventually do full days but not until September 2022 x