Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Can’t motivate myself to do anything

5 replies

Whataboutye88 · 24/06/2021 22:47

I’m posting to ask for advice because I am really struggling to know how to dig myself out of the pit I’ve got myself into. In the space of a year I’ve gone from being healthy, active and happy to overweight, sedentary and detached. I think I’m depressed but don’t want to admit it.
I’ve had two early miscarriages this year, and paid for private tests to see if there was an underlying cause. They showed my thyroid is underactive and as of yesterday I’ve started daily thyroxine. My GP won’t discuss this with me because it’s a private prescription/diagnosis. I feel overwhelmed by trying to navigate managing this by myself while hopefully trying to conceive again after my levels have stabilised. My father is dying of brain cancer, my mum’s not coping, and on top of it I’m doing professional qualifications, and my job which sees me stuck at my laptop 11 hours most days, and managing a house build while my husband works abroad a lot of the time.
I used to be healthy and exercise, but these days I feel so exhausted I can’t peel myself out of bed or off the sofa unless it’s because I have to work, and even then it’s like wading through treacle. The simplest decisions or tasks, like sending an email or making a phone call feel completely beyond me. I’ve stopped doing housework, eating unless someone cooks for me, barely doing more than showering or brushing my hair/teeth. I can’t find the energy to speak to my friends and feel overwhelmed and exhausted by everything. I don’t recognise myself and the moment and I don’t know how to start to help myself feel better, so I’m really looking for some guidance as to how I can start to make this better.

OP posts:
Mammyloveswine · 24/06/2021 23:15

Definitely sounds like depression lovely..can you book a docs appt?

Sending Thanks

Have you spoken with your partner? Shy close friends?

Feel free to dm I was in a similar situation last year.

LiveintheNow · 24/06/2021 23:30

Underactive thyroid will make you feel that way... any idea of test results? E.g. TSH should be around 1.0. If you have just started thyroxine then you should redo blood tests in about six weeks, you may need a higher dose then.

AmberIsACertainty · 24/06/2021 23:59

Leaving aside the issue of whether you're depressed or not, you've got a lot going on. Is it possible to drop any of these things, either temporarily or permanently?

Do you have to be taking professional qualifications right now, while you're ill with underactive thyroid, your dad's dying and you're supporting your mum? Have you told work everything that's going on in your personal life? If you haven't, I think you should.

You're supporting your mum about your dad's illness but who's supporting you? Can you afford a counsellor, if the answer is "nobody"? Do you need counselling because of the miscarriages too?

Is t possible to put the house build in hold for now and pick it up again later? If not, have you told your husband everything that's going on and how you're feeling and struggling? Can he pick up some of this from afar, like phone calls and emails and liasing with people, t take some of the pressure off you?

To get well, you need to focus on and prioritize your health. You can't do that if you're prioritizing all this other stuff.

For the very first thing, can you go see GP, basically tell/show them your first post here and get signed off work for a few weeks? You need a chance to have a rest, a chance for the thyroid meds to start working, then give yourself a kick up the bum regards basic personal care, then put some measures in place to take some of these pressures off you, so you can return to work without falling apart. You're a human being not a robot.

People don't always fall apart mentally sometimes they fall apart physically. I would take the thyroid problems and potential depression as a warning sign that life needs to change so you're looking after yourself better. Sounds like all the loads you've been carrying recently have finally become too much. The proverbial "straw that broke the camel's back". Hope you feel better soon.

Whataboutye88 · 25/06/2021 00:01

Thank you both for your replies - my TSH is 5.95 and I’m waiting for the results of antibody tests too. I’ve never felt exhaustion or lethargy like this, but the doctor said they wouldn’t treat me at this level if I weren’t trying to get pregnant, so I’m not sure if the thyroid is the cause or I’m just not coping with ‘life’.

OP posts:
AmberIsACertainty · 25/06/2021 13:02

The thing that many people don't realise about the NHS (until they're unfortunate enough to get sick) is that the NHS bar for 'ok' or 'normal' seems to be
'conscious',
'able to speak',
'has a job',
'walking',
'not screaming' etc.

They literally don't care if eg you're
-only conscious/sane some of the time,
-you can't explain yourself well enough for medics to understand what you're going through,
-you're only functioning at 50 percent at work and only managing that because all personal life has stopped perhaps including the basics of personal care,
-you're in agony every step you take and can barely walk at all,
-and if you're not screaming then clearly your pain is mild therefore you can't possibly have a serious injury Hmm .

You're alive and you basically look fine OP, so I'm not surprised the NHS won't treat you. That doesn't mean you're not seriously ill.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread