Has anyone turned around their children's eating habits?

[LadyMcBee]

I'm stuck in a huge rut of my own making. My sons (6&10) dictate what they eat, usually a repetitive cycle of some beige food, which I buy just so they eat.

I want to get out of this, I'm so fed up and depressed going shopping, having to buy the same things over and over. I want to make proper, healthy meals, not shove chicken in the oven (which has to be either breaded or on the bone).

Has anyone managed to turn this around? I know they will moan, possibly shout, definitely refuse to eat, but I really want to do the right thing.

serve one or two meals per week of something more interesting. And make sure even the beige meals have some veg (peas / sweetcorn / baked beans all count as veg for this).

tell them they have to have one taste (half forkful or so) of each thing, including the veg.

serve a small portion to start and they don't get seconds until after they have had a taste.

Then just keep going with this. It can take 10 or 20 tastes for a child to like a new food, but if you keep serving it with no pressure to do more than taste, they can slowly change.

Mine used to only eat v basic things. 13 year old is now quite a lot better and the 10 year old is getting there.

Before writing a response, it would be useful to know whether they're just fussy eaters, or whether they've got sensory issues which make it difficult to introduce new foods?
I've had one of each, and my approach has been different

One of my DC sees a dietician and the advice from them boils down to one central motto - do not fuss over food.

Basically you offer a meal, allow a reasonable amount of time for it to be eaten, and then take it away again without comment on how much/how little is eaten. There should no begging, no pleading, no persuading, no "you must eat x-amount of bites", no insisting it's tasted, no conditions attached because all of that just turns it into a battle. If you insist on two bites and your DC says no, what then? You give a consequence? You're creating negative reinforcement around food. Or they say okay and unwillingly force it down? Negative reinforcement. Offer and leave it to them. There should be no punishments ("you stay at the table until you try it") or rewards ("eat it and you can have pudding") relating to food.

Every meal should have 1-2 "safe" foods alongside the new foods or disliked foods so that there is always something for them to eat. If possible, they should serve themselves from dishes in the centre of the table so that they control what goes on their plates.

Main meal of the day should be two courses of a main and a simple dessert such as fruit or yoghurt with no strings attached to the second course - you still get your banana if you didn't eat your broccoli. Two courses means they get enough calories across the entirety of the meal and it gets rid of any links between dessert being a reward for enduring the dreaded vegetables, totally takes the power out of the whole thing because its just food.

Involve them in choosing the meals, helping prepare it and serve it too. I do one day a week that's a kids choice day where they decide what's for dinner and they help make it.

A decent vitamin supplement and a glass of milk every day to cover any deficits and try not to worry about it, variety will come with time for most children.

I started trying out new recipes at the weekend, unless it was something I knew they would like. I just told them I was getting bored of always cooking the same. Did a you must taste it but you don’t have to eat all of it and allowed some fruit if they wanted instead.

At 6&10, you could involve them in preparing the food.

These are great suggestions, thank you so much.

Both are just fussy eaters, youngest tics, but goes long periods without it and can be impulsive and a maturation issue which has resulted in him being on CAHMs waiting list, but he's getting doing lots better so I want to galvanise on this.

I've really failed at cooking for them. I'm trying to find affordable cooking classes. I can cook from scratch for myself but only really simple meals, and they won't entertain it.