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Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

How safe is the UK?

47 replies

FortVictoria · 23/06/2021 02:07

I am British, but didn’t grow up in the UK, and haven’t lived there for 20 years. DH and DD aren’t British, but have the right to live in the UK (ancestry visa). DH is in the final recruitment stages of a job offer in the UK - likely to be, but not definitely, in Reading. We have one DD, aged 15. We are all pretty unhappy where we are, but conversely, I am concerned about relocating to the UK because of DD’s safety. I completely realise that news outlets publish bad news over good news, but from the outside looking in, the UK looks pretty unsafe. Sexual assault and violence looks common. But, wise Mumsnetters, what is the reality like? Can teenagers generally safely navigate their way around a city in daylight without being assaulted or attacked? How safe are schools? I would really appreciate some balanced views.....,,,,,,

OP posts:
Frownette · 23/06/2021 02:12

All the knife crime disturbed me a little bit but on the whole it's safe. You'll just have to teach dd about safety but it's unlikely to happen. She should be ok.

FortVictoria · 23/06/2021 02:28

Thanks, Frownette. Can you elaborate on “teach her about safety?”. I know about not walking in your own in the dark, not talking to strangers, not looking strangers... but it seems a lot of the violence, anti social behaviour and sexual assault happens in broad daylight.

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NiceGerbil · 23/06/2021 02:31

Where will you live?

And where do you live now?

I remember some colleagues in Singapore saying they wouldn't come to London as it was so dangerous and was... ?!

It's compared to where, really.

But yes it's safe, I would say.

The terrorism and knife crime in London sounds awful (and it is of course) but there's 10 million people here.

MarianneUnfaithful · 23/06/2021 02:41

It is perfectly normal for teenagers to walk happily around during daylight and after dark, actually.

All my teens’ friends catch buses on their own until late at night, and we live in… shock horror…London!

People live normal lives.

Frownette · 23/06/2021 02:42

I don't want to exaggerate it as it really is pretty safe. But teach her how to defend herself if anything happens and call police instantly if it's threatening. Should be ok though don't worry too much :)

Susannahmoody · 23/06/2021 02:46

I'd say it depends on where you actually live now.

FortVictoria · 23/06/2021 02:49

Thanks for all your replies. Currently we live in Hong Kong.

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FortVictoria · 23/06/2021 02:50

Sorry, meant to add - if we move to the UK it’s likely we will live in Reading. Not sure which area - still researching that!

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Frownette · 23/06/2021 02:52

Oh I love HK!

FortVictoria · 23/06/2021 02:56

@MarianneUnfaithful - love your username! Which part of London do you live in? I’ve lived in London twice - loved it both times (I was much younger then). But I was also mugged at midday when I lived there, so it wasn’t all perfect! But I appreciate your positive input, as I’m really aware that the best information comes from people who are actually living that life.

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NiceGerbil · 23/06/2021 02:59

I'm fairly sure you'll be safe in reading.

I'd love to go to HK!

FortVictoria · 23/06/2021 03:00

@Frownette - did you live in HK before?

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MarianneUnfaithful · 23/06/2021 03:09

South London, Brixton area.

I can’t pretend that there isn’t trouble. But even here a stabbing is actually not ‘common’ and is regarded with shock, But the truth is that if you are not involved, you are very unlikely to be affected by it. It is predominantly amongst gang members.

I walk home from work late at night, and have never been mugged or assaulted or felt afraid.

Frownette · 23/06/2021 03:09

Yes I did! Loved it. I still miss a lot of HK film I think my favourite was 'and I hate you so' and all wong kar-wai. Slightly jealous you're there!

Frownette · 23/06/2021 03:10

Best of luck with moving anyway, Reading pretty safe

IdblowJonSnow · 23/06/2021 04:03

I think reading is pretty safe? There is lots of low level harassment in the uk, I've had plenty of minor stuff happen over the years. Serious crimes are leas usual but are well publicised and there is a major backlash against this as there should be.
I don't imagine the uk is worse than other countries except perhaps Scandinavian countries where attitudes are less misogynistic.
If you're all unhappy in HK I'd give the move a go.

NameChangeNameShange · 23/06/2021 04:21

Waves from HK and with teens too.
It's insanely safe here, even with the protests I rarely felt uncomfortable, and I think our teens are use to so much freedom and flexibility, so I absolutely get the dilemma. Equally I get the desire to move on, its a funny and heartbreaking time over here.

If she's a typical HK kid, then I think your DD will be fine but may need to become more street smart, I'd imerse her into UK culture over the summer and get her reading UK news - obviously without frightening her but giving her a broader perspective and opening her eyes a bit.

Hopefully as you narrow down the areas other MNs can give more local advice.

PiccalilliChilli · 23/06/2021 04:56

I think as long as you educate your child on personal safety you'll be ok.

I'm in South London and there has been some violent crime but DD knows what to do to keep safe. There are tips on the Suzy Lamplugh Trust website about personal safety.

If we were living where I grew up I'd have less concern but it's a rural, small town where everybody knows everybody.

I've heard Reading is alright, safer than London, with quick trains to the capital.

MakeMineAdoubleChocolate · 23/06/2021 05:32

Hiya, I love reading. We live literally half an hour from there. Reading is actually one of the places we are looking at moving to, in the very, very near future. It's great for shopping, museums, schools and university. And housing isn't too expensive there. However you do get your rough and good areas everywhere and so there are some really nice places in Reading to move to that have a low crime rate. We definitely wouldn't be considering moving there with our 6 kids if we thought it was a bad area.

Best of luck!

romdowa · 23/06/2021 06:21

I moved to the UK and lived there for two years, in a rough enough area and while there were frequent enough episodes, thefts, stabbing etc I never experienced any of it personally.i think if you pick the right area then you should be fine.

BlueCowWonders · 23/06/2021 06:44

Isn't it interesting about risk/ newspaper headlines? I was completely neutral about your question until I saw where you live now! Some of my DC friends are looking at their university year abroad and one is choosing Hong Kong- which I'd be really unhappy about due to the oppression of civil rights and crackdown on dissent. But that's purely what I see in the media and I have no direct information. So just like your reaction.

But I live in a wonderfully safe leafy area (known as a 'bubble' as we are generally outside of gritty reality). My DC school is really hot on behaviour and they've always felt safe and protected there.

I have no known of Reading but I think it's a difficult decision for your family, especially given your DD is 15 - will you wait until after she's finished GCSEs?

BarbaraofSeville · 23/06/2021 07:18

Varies massively between areas, you can't generalise. Even within cities there are safe and unsafe areas within walking distance of each other. But I think it's mostly safe and a lot of the violence and assaults are in the news because they are relatively rare. It's certainly fine to be out and about in cities in the daytime.

I don't know Reading very well but I think it is a typical smaller city that is mostly safe with maybe a few rougher/less safe areas, which you'll probably avoid anyway choosing housing/schools. And a lot of the times, the violence is gang related, so if you don't associate with gangs, it doesn't affect you.

Butterfly44 · 23/06/2021 07:27

Depends on where you live. We're in a village and my 15DD will be out late with friends. I've no concerns. I would worry more if we lived in the capital and she did the same activities. But any capital city is probably similar.

Standrewsschool · 23/06/2021 07:50

What are your main concerns? Generally speaking, UK is safe. There is crime, and some places are worst than others. However, I’ve rarely felt unsafe.

reluctantbrit · 23/06/2021 08:04

I live in SE London for 20 years now. Yes, we had a burglary, I know of an assault and some teen bullying getting physical. But I also feel very safe, happy to have my nearly 14 year old out during the day with friends in the parks.

I have more issues with the overly sexualised way teens are expected to behave thanks to too much reality stars, too much PC and constant arguments about gender vs sex. DD recently said "It's hard to be a teen and not knowing what's right".