Music practice -how do you get them to do it?

[HarrietHairbrush]

Argh. It’s so hard. Any advice welcome?

I gave up going on at them to practice as it was so draining and tbh, its not me who has to have the embarrassment of having a lesson when I've not practised.

Having said that I tried all sorts over the years to get them to practice with mixed success.

DS2 is 11 and has decided that when he starts secondary he will stop lessons, and I'm not sorry!

However, they both learned to read music, which was the goal and now DS1 who is 15 often plays the piano and guitar for fun and also composes his own electronic music, so it wasn't all for nothing!

Set a small goal each day, e.g. Day 1 - learn the first 2 bars in the right hand until you can play it easily; Day 2 - same 2 bars in the left hand; Day 3 - same 2 bars both hands together, etc. Start with a warm up by playing an old piece of their choice, however easy.

If they have a small tangible goal each day, they are more motivated to practise than if they are just told "do 30 mins practice". If they can reach the daily goal in 5 mins, fine. Don't make them sit there for a set amount of time just for the sake of it.

I find this approach works best with my pupils of all ages. You can get the child to set the goals if they're old enough, but you or the teacher may need to help in the beginning until you get an idea of what is achievable each day.

Hope that helps.

Why force them to do a hobby if they don't want to? Save your battles for something that's actually important like literacy and numeracy.

We took a "15 minutes each day, no ifs or buts" approach with DD and the piano. We had a couple of painful years during the tweens but she's now been learning a good 9 to 10 years, plays really quite well and voluntarily practises much more than 15 minutes. She openly admits that she's really glad we made it a non-negotiable until she could play competently and decide herself whether or not she actually liked the instrument. She's still has lessons now (although I'm gradually beginning to suspect that most of the hour is currently spent gossiping with her teacher rather than playing. They've become thick as thieves ).

Short, daily, non-negotiable, set time.

I always had to do 10 mins before tea, after neighbours.

It’s the switching to start the practice that’s hard. Once they start they will probably enjoy it. You just have to give them to push - so have a defined trigger and time.

She openly admits that she's really glad we made it a non-negotiable until she could play competently and decide herself whether or not she actually liked the instrument

Same. I am so happy my mum made me practice because I got an awful lot of enjoyment out of playing the instrument and being in bands and it’s something I still play as an adult occasionally.

Not many children have the self discipline to switch from playing/watching tv onto music practice but most will enjoy it overall.

DS2: hopeless.
6m guitar lessons (he wanted to do it) - me nag nag
2y piano lessons (he wanted to do it - me nag nag nag nag nag. I offered him every term to stop, he insisted to carry on.🤔

DS1 & DD: couldn't peel them off the piano. He's got grade 6, then self-taught playing the guitar.
She had to have lessons stopped coz of Covid, was playing Jingle Bells in the summer so she wouldn't forget🤣

@ignatiusjreilly

Set a small goal each day, e.g. Day 1 - learn the first 2 bars in the right hand until you can play it easily; Day 2 - same 2 bars in the left hand; Day 3 - same 2 bars both hands together, etc. Start with a warm up by playing an old piece of their choice, however easy.

If they have a small tangible goal each day, they are more motivated to practise than if they are just told "do 30 mins practice". If they can reach the daily goal in 5 mins, fine. Don't make them sit there for a set amount of time just for the sake of it.

I find this approach works best with my pupils of all ages. You can get the child to set the goals if they're old enough, but you or the teacher may need to help in the beginning until you get an idea of what is achievable each day.

Hope that helps.

This is really helpful I am going to talk to the teacher today

I'm glad it helped. It can be a bit disheartening sitting playing the same piece every night over and over to get through the practice time, never feeling like they're making any progress. If there's a goal they need to reach before they can stop, it gives them an incentive to focus and get it done quickly.

The reason I suggest warming up with something they like and can play easily is that it reminds them of what they've accomplished so far and makes them feel capable. Plus it's more enjoyable than learning something new! And it's good to review old pieces regularly anyway.

Good luck! You're doing the right thing by pushing them to practise. Everyone learning an instrument goes through times when they feel like giving up, but they will thank you for it one day.

Practice is OK during term time but really falls apart over the longer half-terms/holidays due to lack of structure in our daily routine.

My son's piano teacher recently recommended this practice partner (www.pianopracticehelp.com) and he has been great for my DS (10). I should say that Adrian is a student (however, a very mature and talented one) and because of this, his price is reasonable. For us the great thing is that the session is online via Zoom so not having to leave the house - the silver linings of lockdown!

We had booked practice sessions twice a week in the last half-term and we are planning on doing more over the summer break. My DS was actually practicing everyday with no complaints!!

Be very careful

After many years of nagging, DS now willingly plays (rather than practices, I think that's the key) electric guitar daily, sometimes in excess of three hours. He's also taught himself the drums, but thankfully cannot physically manage more than about 90 minutes at the most.

The turning point for us was allowing him to give up the orchestral instrument he had played for some years to concentrate on his guitar. Also by speaking to his teacher and agreeing to pretty much drop the graded exams. DS's guitar teacher does teach him the theory, but it's incidental to the actual playing and just so that he is at the correct technical level. He's about to take grade 6 so that he has a benchmark of progress should he ever need it, but truthfully it's taken nearly two years and he's only doing it as a means to an end.