Help me have a good 2 weeks off?

[ladybee28]

I've been working flat-out for months, almost to the point of total exhaustion. Stuck it out because it was worth it for the money, and because it was temporary.

And I've been looking forward the whole time to a couple of weeks' holiday I'd booked –had got myself a discounted stay at a fancy hotel, some fun workshops booked in... my partner was going to take care of my dog (he's old and suffers terrible separation anxiety so can't be home alone). I never really invest in my own time off and find it hard to 'switch off', so this felt like a real treat.

And then the day before my time off began, my poor DP's mother went into the ICU in her home country and we booked him on the next available flight.

I've had to cancel all my plans, the hotel, etc., to stay home with DSS and the animals, and it looks as though DP now might be away the whole time I have off.

Which is totally right, and he needs to be there, and I wouldn't have it any other way given what's happening.... AND I'd also really like to claw back some semblance of a nice time off work in the meantime.

I'm just floating around the house not really able to focus on anything, and I'm going a bit out of my mind. Can't leave DDog more than 30 minutes alone, and DP is the only other person he'll stay home with without crying.

What can I do to really recharge myself properly, given what's happened? Especially since I WFH anyway and am ALWAYS here...

Can't stepson go to his mother's?
I'd sort out something for the dog and go anyway.
But then I'm not a fan of dogs let alone overly needy ones!
Dog-friendly break instead and take him with you?

No, the situation is as it is because it needs to be this way.

DSS's mother is also out of the country right now for work. He can be with his grandparents for a couple of days, but they can't get him to and from school easily so that can only be at weekends.

And DDog isn't just 'overly needy', he's recovering from trauma from before he came to me last year. Not only would it be cruel, it would make the situation even worse for the weeks and months after.

The situation I'm in is what it is –I just want to find some things to make it feel a bit more 'holiday'.

I said I'd sort something else for the dog, but then I wouldn't own a dog in the first place, so what I would do isn't particularly relevant.
I did suggest a dog friendly break - maybe you could do that at the weekend if DSS could go to his grandparents?
Apart from that, you'll just have to do nice day trips with the dog while DSS is at school.
Depends on the weather too but if it's nice you could laze around in the garden (assuming you have one) with a book and a nice drink.
Get yourself some treats, food and drink, lovely bunch of flowers, new book/magazine to make it feel more special being at home.

Order in a shop with all your favourite foods including treats, nice drinks, etc
Do a boots order for face packs bubble bath hair mask etc and have a pamper day
Sort out a dvd day or netflix or something
Buy some new plants for the garden if you have and spend a day out there
New book
Rearrange furniture / rooms to make a change maybe order new cushions or curtains or something
Sort out all you clothes and have a trying on session plan outfits
Just try to relax and enjoy

Does DSS's mother have a partner? Just wondering if there is another stepparent who lives close enough to school to do the school run, perhaps he could spend one of the two weeks with them.

Oh what a shame, how frustrating.

What kind of things do you like to do?
I'd get a cleaner in so I was in a spick and span environment at home (and sit out/go for a walk while cleaner was there). I'd also get myself favourite foods and some lovely flowers for the house.

Then just think of all the lovely things you enjoy doing - is there anything you can do by taking the dog with you on walks/day trips etc? Even just out for lunch on a lovely terrace with the papers?

At home, For example there are so many free online lectures/tours of galleries and museums since lockdown started, books, films, crafting, cooking etc.

But it sounds as though you really need a rest and if that means doing a lot of nothing for a couple of weeks then please don't feel there's anything wrong with that

If you like pampering, you could book a massage or facial or manicure in your home, there are massage therapists and beauticians who do home visits.

I would buy a copy of Simple Things magazine, read it on the sofa with DDog and do as many of the suggested activities as you can. Cook some of the dishes/cakes and plan trips.

Can you go to the hotel anyway (or a closer, dog-friendly but still luxurious one if too far away/not suitable) at the weekend while DSS is at his grandparents'?

Assuming you managed to get your money back on the cancellations, put some of it towards luxurious takeaways (including some healthy ones so you don't end up feeling rubbish at the end of the fortnight) for you and DSS, so that you don't have to cook. Get a cleaner in so you don't have to clean over your holiday period. Don't do any laundry etc if at all possible (just like you wouldn't have done if you'd been on holiday). Basically, outsource or ignore all the mundane jobs we go on holiday to avoid! Spend the time relaxing and doing whatever you like to do instead.

Get someone to come round and do beauty treatments at your house to replace the spa element, if the dog won't be left long enough for you to go out for them. Order in afternoon tea. Buy flowers for the house. Get some new books. Basically get as many holiday elements to come to you as you can, if you're a bit tied to the house. And don't feel guilty spending the holiday budget on treats for yourself and the house - splurge more than you normally would.

But it sounds as though you really need a rest and if that means doing a lot of nothing for a couple of weeks then please don't feel there's anything wrong with that

Oh gosh @Palavah that actually just brought a tear to my eye.

I think maybe doing absolutely nothing of note is exactly what I need - even in my 'time off' I'm feeling pressure to be productive or to use the time the best possible way... and perhaps that's part of the problem.

Some great suggestions here @AnotherEmma and @DoAsYouWouldBeMumBy and @StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes, thankyou. I like the idea of cooking something comforting each day and pottering in the garden a little. Maybe I'll finally open that Ottolenghi cookbook that's been languishing on my shelf for months!

I actually just fell fast asleep since posting this and feel like I could do it again... maybe the universe is sending me a message 😂

Get DSS to grandparents at least for the weekend, if not for longer (you could book taxis for school run?) and go away on a dog friendly break if you can find anything at short notice.

Laze about in the garden in the sunshine.

Read books.

Book home-visit beauty treatments.

Cook nice things / order delivery / buy fancy ready made/easy cook stuff

Invite friends round for drinks and dinner after work

Invite any non working friends over for day time fun

Go for nice day trips with the dog

We had a ‘staycation’ during last year lockdown but with young children so it wasn’t too relaxing

What do you normally do as treat?

• magazine
• book
• a wander around shops - if you find clothes shopping stressful then look for household, nik nack kind of shops, take always, meals out, afternoon at home.
• get some garden furniture
• posh cordial and tea - just up brand things you normally have do
• watch films instead of TV programme, maybe on the afternoon or go to the cinema

Try and do things at different times of the day.

Oh bless you. In that case please do not try to do too much. If you were in a resort hotel the only thing you'd have to decide is what to eat and drink (from a menu someone else would prepare and bring to you) and which sunbed to lie on. Please don't make this holiday any more taxing than it needs to be.

(I learned the hard way and made myself bad for taking the rest I really needed rather than embracing it).

Hope you've managed to get some sleep.

Go on a World Tour from your living room/kitchen. Order different takeaways, cook different cuisines and match with music and films from the relevant country.