Quick one re tattoos

[BasiliskStare]

My niece has said she wants to have a sleeve tattoo. She is 21. Her choice and her father has said it is her choice. Now if someone wants a tattoo that is utterly their choice - but is this ( see below ) an utterly mad idea ? Asking for advice here

Is there a reputable place website / ordering where you could get a temporary tattoo & it would not look dreadful so she could give it a go before she goes for the whole thing. Or do they look rubbish if not a proper tattoo ?

I am not making a comment about tattoos here other than in the sense they are a bit permanent - I think said niece thinks of it as fashion - so that is why I am asking could I buy a temporary one so she can give it a trial run - if she really wants one - great . She is thinking in a few months time .

Please no one think I am saying tattoos are a bad thing - but I hope some will get why I am asking this question. I am not the boss of her - I just wonder if there is a way of trying it out before you go through the whole procedure .

[Mama1980]

Oh no not at all I get that. I was just wanting to quickly reassure you that it will hopefully all be ok. My mother way back then felt similar to you.
As others have said a sleeve will take a while so she will have time to pause and think during the process. If she changes her mind on a full full sleeves designs can often be adapted slightly.

[Craftycorvid]

Had my first one last year (just before lockdown part one) at a little older than 21. . It’s a design I worked out myself with the help of the lovely tattooist. It’s on a part of my body that’s easy to hide if necessary. I love it - it’s a work of art. Took about six hours though, and was a fairly tiring experience (though more uncomfortable than painful). I’m thinking of getting another, again on a part of my body easy to cover up if a tattoo isn’t something I want to display. The only caution I’d offer your niece is to consider what line of work she might want to pursue and if having a full sleeve will be a problem for her.

[BasiliskStare]

@Craftycorvid - good point - niece did ask us if we thought it might be a disincentive in a job interview . I pretty much think if it can be covered by regular clothing if necessary - no one cares

[lljkk]

19yo DD has a crappy home-made one that she got in student halls of residence. I hope that will get the "tattoo bug" out of her system. she did say it hurt like F*&k.

if you want to interfere, OP, could try to encourage Niece just to get a little line outline one on the arm, or perhaps a few meaningful words, "just to test out what it's like" Something the sleeve would completely cover anyway.

I half wonder if maybe for DD's birthday sometime I'll pay for her to get something small and pretty & well done, instead. I'll keep that in mind, maybe feel out if she has any more such daft tattoo impulses. Or just pay for proper artist to go over the crappy one she has, eventually.

[SionnachRua]

Starting with a sleeve is a huge commitment, especially when she's not had a tattoo before. Would she go for a smaller one first? A lot of people don't handle being tattooed very well.

Tbh it's her skin and her decision to make, so not much you can do about it (as it should be).

[BasiliskStare]

@lljkk - I think I have been handed my arse on a stick for interfering ( is that even a phrase ? ) I think you are right - get one done and see how it goes.

Look I do not have a tattoo myself , my point was she talked about a whole sleeve in the same way as getting her hair dyed white blonde. But ( and am nearly three times as old as her ) there are decisions I made at her age which I would not make now - personally I don't think the white blonde thing will suit her but who cares. - hair only grows one way - I have not said a single thing
My point was a whole sleeve in one go is permanent and 10 or more years down the line - is this a fashion thing which is hard to reverse. But it sounds like this isn't going to happen in one go.

Thank you those who have told me to shut up. Equally I am glad to hear she won't be able to go and get a full sleeve in one go. So it sounds like she can do a design and have a bit of it done and then decide if she wants more

Thank you all. Having never had one myself I am sadly misinformed about tattoos

I am overinvested. I know that. I am not without some self awareness - she is my niece and I can't help myself trying to explain decisions at 21 may not be those you would choose at 30 or 40 or 50. But all to those who have tattoos later than 21. Aces

I know I am coming over as the most awful old fuddy duddy ( so someone take my shovel away so I can stop digging) - but it was just the thought of going from no tattoos to a full sleeve as a fashion thing rather than getting one or two and see how it goes from there.


Thank you all for all opinions - I appreciate them

Basilisk x

[FactsAndFigs]

At least you not having rows with her or being nagged like I was with my DD, am glad to say she did finally appreciate my advice also not chance in hell I finding any dodgy tattooist whilst still 16. I said at 18yr I will help find good one.

At 18yrs she changed what tattoos she wanted and 18 she also didn’t have money to pay for them, I never agreed to funding them.

She in 20’s now still no tattoos as has other priorities, the tattooist round here that really great artists are expensive & have waitlist.

I got my 1st one in my 40’s I’d love more but don’t have pain threshold.

If she determined to get one, I would offer to help find one with good representation and view their work.

I thought I could walk in with my drawing and be done in 5mins, he had to redraw it also change sizes as would of just ended up blur

Mine small and only see if hair up and low neckline

[BasiliskStare]

@FactsAndFigs Thank you - I am sure it looks lovely. I personally don't want one and am too squeamish but I can see some look lovely. ( Also I am not up for pain when not necessary

So niece is 21 - I cannot tell her what to do. It was just the thing about her talking of having a whole sleeve in the same way as having her hair coloured.

But I have had some very good advice here - so thank you all

[Nat6999]

I got my first tattoo at 48 in memory of my late dp, it's a red rose on my lower back. I keep on saying I'm going to have another one on my thigh, I've got the design all chosen but really don't know if I could cope with the pain.

[BasiliskStare]

@Nat6999 [ grin] I dread the dentist - not sure I would be up for pain for the sake of a pretty thing even if I fancied it - but I can see that is a very meaningful thing for you .

[SamusIsAGirl]

I have most of a half sleeve - It will be a full sleeve but I'm not planning on going below the elbow for a while yet. I was 40 when I got my first tattoo and I want to get used to being a tattooed person first - forearms are a very visible placement.

I have also spent >£1200 on this already - it goes from elbow to shoulder. If she wants a sleeve she will need to think of ideas and compositions and work with the tattoo artist. Also think about how the sleeve will be broken down into sections or how it will look with just the outlines - a full sleeve is seldom done in a day and almost never for a first timer. Mine still isn't finished but looks finished IFSWIM.

Also, I would start on the upper arm - jobstoppers are still a consideration. She also needs to think about whether she will want this in 20-30 years time. I have had this idea since my teens but have only had the confidence to get it done now - it is geometric dotwork.

Also bear in mind the pain and the recovery process - the inside of the arm is no joke!

[gonow]

Out of interest, what's the fashionable tattoo to have this year? I can remember a lot of the trends in the past
Butterfly on back of neck
Colour wash flowers
Tribal
Chinese writing
Swallows
Angel wings

Is there a fashion at the moment?

[SamusIsAGirl]

I think it is watercolour tattoos - recently it was infinity symbols or the feathers merging into birds.
Whatever design you go for, make sure you still want it decades later and think of the legibility and limits of the medium.

[YonderTweek]

I would also recommend anything that can be easily covered up with clothes. I have pretty much a sleeve (haven't done the elbow yet because of Covid ) and one of my legs quite tattooed too, and I remember working for a university and having to wear thick tights and cardigans during a heatwave in July. It was rather uncomfortable. Haha. I don't regret the tattoos though, I got my first one at 16 (my dad took me, bless him

[gamerchick]

I will be candid - I would not have a tattoo myself as they sound expensive and painful - but but but that is only my opinion - I know others who have them where is is a joy to them and meaningful.

They are expensive but they're not painful. Not the way you think anyway. I have 2 hour sittings and after the third I'll still he no where near a sleeve.

It's the first 2 weeks after that's a pain in the arse.

I would keep out of it. Sleeves don't date anyroad imo. It'll take a long time and will cost a lot of money. Plus good tattooists are booked up months in advance around here. She would be better getting an appointment now if she's thinking in a few months.

[NinaMimi]

You can get large fake tattoos which look quite good. I can’t remember where I got mine as it was a while ago but I think on Etsy

[filka]

As you've realised, some employers don't like visible tattoos. So you think it's easy enough to cover up, but just think about height of summer, weather is pushing 30 and she has to wear long sleeved clothes.

As if it isn't hard enough to get a job anyway, without making it even harder by limiting your options...

[KurtWilde]

My brother is a tattooist. No reputable artist would do an entire sleeve as a first tattoo. Just like they won't do neck or hands as a first tattoo in case you regret it or have an issue with work. A sleeve is a big commitment.

Whilst I say, respectfully, that it really has nothing to do with you that she wants a tattoo, I'd also say she should start with something smaller and more discreet so she can get an idea of how it feels, and not make a choice she might regret.

[BasiliskStare]

@KurtWilde - exactly so - I had not realised that tattooists won't do a whole sleeve / arm in one go & I utterly accept she is an adult and must do as she wishes but the idea of maybe coming up with a whole design and then doing it incrementally sounds good

Again I emphasise I am not going to tell her what to do ( & she would do what she wants to do anyway ) It was - as I said the idea of a full arm of tattoos being thought of in the same way as a haircut / colour when you haven't had a single one before .

Sounds like she won't be able to get that all in one go though - so gives her time to think.

I have bought her some temporary tattoos which are probably rubbish so when she gets home from shopping I shall give them to her if for nothing else than a laugh. She must bin them. She will laugh - we get on well.

I think what I may have done here is mistake age for wisdom & I am looking at this through my own lens. I do get that. I am not without self awareness.

Thank you though all for all comments. I appreciate them all.

[BasiliskStare]

Right - update

I did buy some temporary tattoos for my niece and whilst DH and her father were watching the football , we had rather giggle sorting them out so she could have a a go with them.

Latest appears to be she is still thinking of a lot ( more but smaller ) on one upper arm but no longer so keen on lower arm as well

She knows these temporary ones won't look as good as a real ones but she rather enjoyed sorting them out and giving it a try. I think it has made her think about sorting out what she really wants

So I hope no-one will think I am telling her what to do or not - I am not - but she said it has made her think more about what to do rather than just rushing headlong. These temporary ones have ( she said to me ) given her more of a chance to think about what she wants as a permanent one & thinking of a design


Thank you everyone for all advice - for or against.

I have stepped back now completely ( which I probably should have done before. )

But thank you all for advice and comments

[JingsMahBucket]

What a great ending @BasiliskStare. You sound like a wonderful aunt and it made smile reading about the two of you giggling about tattoos. Well done!

[yourestandingonmyneck]

I don't think your idea would work (even if you could find such a thing) because the permanence will be what is attracting her. I think she would just laugh at the idea of a "fake" tattoo.

As others have said though, you don't get a sleeve all at once. It's a gradual thing. So she needs to focus on precisely what she wants abs where to start with. She might never continue to get the whole sleeve.

If she did, however, I doubt she would regret it. Ppl with tattoos like that tend to be alternative and the tattoos are an expression of that and what they are into. They tend not to change. It's a big part of their life and identity. I have a lot of tattoos, and so do a lot of ppl I know. I don't know any heavily tattooed people who regret them. I do, however, know a lot of people with one TweetyPie, for example, tattoo, who do regret it

[MozambiqueHere]

Well done OP for being willing to listen to advice and realise you were in the wrong. That's a rare thing on here!

Going from 0 tattoos to a full sleeve certainly is a big jump that I wouldn't recommend. It's not uncommon to end up not liking your first tattoos as much (you were younger when you got them, didn't know as much, maybe went to a less skilled tattoo artist, etc) so it's better if your first ones are smalller!

But as you said, it's her decision. She's an adult.

Regarding the not doing sleeves all in one go thing, that's true except that often the first session would be to do most of the outlines, so essentially the commitment is done there and then. Her arm could be entirely covered in lines after one session, no problem.

[Whyhello]

I’m glad I didn’t get the tattoos I wanted at 16/17, I wanted a full chest piece that said something crass like hello sailor after seeing it on MySpace . I waited until my mid twenties before getting them and now actually have ones I still like.

I’d trust a 21 year old more than an 18 year old to make a good decision. You can always get them lasered if they’re truly ghastly. Just make sure she doesn’t get any on her hands.

[CorianderBee]

Sleeves take a while so she won't have it all done at one time.

I got my first tattoo at 18, it's quite big but in a hidden place. No regrets. But, I did find the pain a LOT. And so have never had one since (am now 26) she might be the same. Never know.