Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Do you share food?

138 replies

IHaveBrilloHair · 12/06/2021 15:40

Dd and I went to Yo Sushi yesterday which is always been somewhere we share the dishes, kinda tapas style.
It suprised me that the other people around us all seemed to order their own.
We always share Indian/Chinese food too and wouldn't think to just get our own dishes, we always choose together.
Obviously in places where you order one dish we don't do anything other than have a taste of each others.
Are you sharers?

OP posts:
SquirrelFan · 13/06/2021 09:00

Chinese, Thai, Indian takeaway = share from middle of table. Otherwise you're stuck with a plate of the same thing! For a western meal, say steak and chips and a salad, that's THREE things on your plate. Why wouldn't you want at least the same when you order a takeaway? You wouldn't have a steak all by itself!
For western - style meals out, if we're having trouble deciding or if one thing is markedly healthier, DH and I will sometimes order different things then split them so we each have half.

TillyTopper · 13/06/2021 09:08

I think it's a cultural thing. If you order food with friends in many Asian countries you share it. In the UK not to much. Personally we'd share in Yo Sushi or Indian or Chinese when ordering several dishes, but if we order 1 thing that arrives on a plate (e.g. burger, steak) we wouldn't.

HollowTalk · 13/06/2021 09:12

@Kinsters

When I share in a western place we swap out plates if we're properly sharing or just place a bit of the food on the others plate if just tasting each others.

In Asian restaurants it's common for all the dishes to be on plates in the centre of the table and everyone seated around the table is given an empty plate to fill up. I live in Asia and it is fairly common for even western food to be served this way.

But is it common over there to take food off someone's plate while they're eating? That's what I can't stand! I don't think anyone here minds a shared plate in the middle of the table, it's sitting opposite someone who is eyeing up your food that's the problem.
Topseyt · 13/06/2021 09:13

No. I don't share my food.

EversoDelighted · 13/06/2021 09:22

We'd never take food from another person's plate without it being offered first, but we do routinely offer each other a taste, or ask if anyone wants to finish something when we have had enough (DH and DCs).

CuriousaboutSamphire · 13/06/2021 09:28

Sorry, late to this but the idea that 'sharers' are greedy and selfish just means that some of you have had the misfortune to meet some self absorbed pillock's.

We're sharers, my family are not. So when I wanted a big Chinese meal for my birthday, I was paying, my DF, DM and DSis ordered their own. DH and I ordered a mix that we liked and my 9 year old nephew asked if he could join in - there were dishes he hadn't been allowed to taste before as nobody else were sharers.

Every single time he reached for something that wasn't technically his dish my DF tried to intervene. I spent the whole meal talking to a 9 year old about the food, which flavours he liked best, seafood or meat or the veg etc.

Same DF was horrified when we went to a lovely tapas bar and, when I realized that my rabbit dish had all the inner bits, heart, liver, I shared them with DH because they were the best bits. Teeny, tiny morsels of food that I gave to DH because they tasted amazing.

DF simply doesn't understand that level of sharing, lack of selfishness.

I want to share the good bits with people I love, or even only like. Why is that selfish, or in any way odd?

From my perspective anyone who doesn't want to do the same is odd.

Then again I don't mean share a whole meal, or enforced sharing because I can respect a non sharers choices.

Kinsters · 13/06/2021 09:41

HollowTalk I don't know what others do but in my family it's more normal to pass food from your own plate to another's rather than them to take from your plate to theirs. I don't know why but that's how we do it.

HollowTalk · 13/06/2021 09:45

I had a bad experience with a friend and her family where they just stared at each other's plates throughout their meal and grabbed food when the other person wasn't look. "I didn't think you wanted it" etc. And I really hate it when people eat really fast and then stare at someone else's plate - just want to tell them to fuck off!

RowenaRavenclawtheSecond · 13/06/2021 09:57

Why do people have to try the whole menu in one visit? Can't you go to the same restaurant again?

AyyX · 13/06/2021 10:01

Yep. When I go out to eat with my friends and family, we always share food! Or most of the time anyway. We usually always choose together too and share each dish unless one person is a fussy eater and doesn’t want the food we order. I have noticed when I go out to eat most people just order their own dishes.

Chikapu · 13/06/2021 10:02

Yes. People seem to be way too precious about food.

Taikoo · 13/06/2021 10:24

I hate sharing food and I hate people picking off my plate.

Getafuckinggripman · 13/06/2021 10:37

What the fuck?! DON'T TOUCH MY FUCKING FOOD!!!!!!!!!!!

HannaHat · 13/06/2021 10:46

I don’t share 😬

RightOnTheEdge · 13/06/2021 10:50

People who share are the tight greedy ones? Confused

I would have no problem if someone asked to try a bit of my food.

It does depend what it is though.
If its Chinese or Indian takeaway then you get huge portions so my family would always offer each other a bit of theirs. Not off the plate though I mean if there's any left in the carton.
I wouldn't ask someone for something off their plate though.

In restaurants then everyone would eat their own food. I'd never mind if a family member or friend asked to try a bit though.

Auntienumber8 · 13/06/2021 10:52

In Chinese culture food is shared and there is quite a bit of etiquette involved regarding senior members of the family and guests.
DH is English and did tend to plate up a whole portion at once rather than continually take small amounts. I had to give him many pointers about the etiquette of eating Chinese food.

So I was brought up very much with shared food but I suppose that is very different to pinching chips off someone’s plate. I must admit I do see sushi as taking an individual plate though if I liked something and there was another piece I would see if anyone else would like to try it or recommend they get their own plate when it next passes.

Taking food off someone’s actual plate is bad manners in any culture surely.

Original poster
IHaveBrilloHair · 13/06/2021 11:43

I honestly didn't know people had such strong feelings about it!
Dd and I have always done this, it makes no sense to me not to when we both eat everything and love to try new things.
That said, we are pite though and would never enforce sharing on others or suddenly start grabbing at someone else's food.
That's not really a sharing issue though, that's a manners issue.

OP posts:
Original poster
IHaveBrilloHair · 13/06/2021 11:47

BTW, Yo atm is all ordered.
We could have tried six things each obviously, but we'd rather share and try twelve.

OP posts:
cravingthelook · 13/06/2021 12:00

Totally, with my kids, exH, friends that like to, my sisters and I always have.

I think it stems from when I was little and my grandfather always gave me a taste of whatever 'exotic' food he was having. It was to encourage us to taste new things as there wasn't variety at home (my mum wasn't well off and we ate very frugally)

coogee · 13/06/2021 12:04

Yes.

3LittleDucksQuack · 13/06/2021 12:18

Occasionally. Generally we like different things with Indian and Chinese. but sometimes order something we've not tried to share /taste or maybe 2 sides and share so get variety

We always share pizzas as we order 3 / 4 different ones for all of us and all have a bit of what we want

Original poster
IHaveBrilloHair · 13/06/2021 13:09

No one other than Dd ever wants to share pizzas with me as I always have anchovies and olives and no one ever seems to like them!
Meh, all the more for meGrin

OP posts:
HilaryBriss · 13/06/2021 14:14

I am definitely not not a sharer.

If I order chicken chow mein, that's because that's what I fancy on that occasion. I don't order it so that other people can take half of it and leave me with some other dish that I didn't want. Order your own chow mein!

NotImpossible · 13/06/2021 14:55

I don't generally. I will offer someone a small piece if they are curious about what I'm eating (in some groups I'm the only veggie and I'm quite happy to dispell the weird ideas some people have about vegetarian food)! But I don't like trying other people's meals as a rule.

Smithy's hissy fit about the takeaway is one of my favourite scenes from Gavin and Stacey Grin

HopeYourHighHorseBucks · 13/06/2021 15:06

It depends on the food I think. If we got a chippy tea for example then we'd order what we fancy. Same as McDonalds etc.

Chinese is the main one we share out, if someone wants anything specific than they can but most of it is shared out. If it works for the non sharers then why not. I enjoy too many dishes though and couldn't imagine ordering myself one dish. Really want Chinese food now.