WWYD- cycling to school question

[DarlingWithoutYou]

DS is going to secondary this September and will need to cycle there as there's no buses in that direction. It's a 20 min cycle (according to google) but he's slow so likely longer.

My worries: I have been AGONISING over this for the past year. He has barely ever rode a bike so is not confident at all. He's only turning 11 in August so youngest in his year. I paid £60 for him to have a 2 hour session with a 'bike guru' recommended in our local town fb group, which he found very helpful but cried when he came back as said he'd been so scared riding on the road. I'm also really worried he will get lost! He's so dopey and young.

My 'What Would You Do' is this- I am off work until January. So, I could drive him until then. However his dad thinks he should just start cycling in Sep and get into the habit from day one, rather than having to learn in December when the days are darker and wetter.

WWYD? Drive him until Jan? Make him cycle?

Any help appreciated, or a reminder to pull my socks up is fine too, he is my PFB

Cycle with him so you can coach him on the journey. Driving him till January just delays it, doesn’t solve it.

Absolutely 100% the answer to this is to cycle with him. there's no way he'll get more confident without practice, but it is a bit much to ask him to just head off on his own when he's not. If you don't have a bike borrow one.

What are the roads like for cyclists?
I'd drive him until January, he'll be taller and more confident by then, or at least more used to his new school.

I am off work until January. So, I could drive him until then.

The obvious solution is for you to cycle with him, surely?

Are there any other children going that way he can cycle with?

I would do the route with him lots over the summer with the intention of him doing it himself from day one.

Practice. He won't learn if not given an opportunity.

Cycling in September will be more pleasant than cycling in January for the first time.

I would cycle with him for the first week or so. My ds is year 6 and wanted to start cycling to school, it's a 15-20min journey. I was so worried the first fee times! But did the journey with him 2 or 3 times to make sure he knew the way well and made sensible decisions - where to cross, when to go on pavements etc., and now it's fine. I just get annoyed when he says he doesn't want to cycle!

I paid for my son to do Bikeability privately, it was a lot more than 2 hours.

Its practice generally on the road, familiarity with the route, and practicing at the times he will be travelling to and from school.

When he starts school, he will probably find other kids cycling that he can meet up and travel with

Cycling in Jan is much harder than September so he needs to practice now so he's better by Jan.
Worst case scenario is you cycle with him in September

I agree, start going out with him now, on his specific route to school and just general pottering. My eldest cycles to primary on his own (it's literally 5 mins down the hill though there is a funny junction. Just very, very few cars, it's super rural) and while I do trust him the problem can be drivers trying to be nice and waving you across junctions. He needs to learn to be part of any traffic, and obey the rules, and give himself time to make decisions.

But massively, massively encourage him to cycle to school. It's my one regret about our high school that there's a super fast 60mph stretch that I don't trust drivers on, so my son will be getting the bus. Oh in winter make sure he has a school bag/rucksack with a waterproof cover! And mudguards but they're not cool... just....very necessary

Cycle with him almost daily until September

Start cycling with him now to build up his confidence (and yours) on the road, then he'll have 3 months of building fitness and confidence before he's riding to school. Also have a look if theres any quieter ways to cycle there via back streets

Go out on weekends as a family, he'll pick up confidence. Also depending on where you live there may be shared use pavements, this is what my dd used from starting high school at 10, 3 miles each way

I used to cycle commute back in the day, 5 miles each way I loved it.

I've cycled fair distances since I was quite young as dad was a keen cyclist and cycle commuted when he could too. He was army it was very much encouraged as bikes take up less space for parking on camp etc plus if they had bikes on camp they could pop to most other parts of camp easily if they needed to plus it's exercise

He needs to build confidence BUT he also needs to be educated on how to handle the road cycling - potholes and other obstacles etc and of course Highway Code and road etiquette plus absolutely safety precautions. Cyclists cannot use the road as other vehicles do as they are far more vulnerable.

I hope at the very least you are getting him a good helmet, maybe also gloves reflective items especially for winter and trouser clips/straps

Personally I would say a good loud horn too

Essential to make sure the bike is in good working order including reflectors and lights too - don't go somewhere like Halfords for this go to a good independent bike sales/repair store to have it checked over and do this regularly I'd say half termly

Also teach and prepare him to deal with things like punctures and minor mechanical issues en route. Nothing more knackering than having to carry a bike!

Practising now would be good as it's much easier during the fine weather AND when drivers are half expecting there to be cyclists anyway you'll both get to know where the hotspots are and where it may be advisable to get off and walk for a bit if there's any bad junctions or especially busy crossroads.

But sort all that and he should be good to go!

I can't cycle with him as I have a disability and his dad lives too far away to do that. Wish I could though.

You haven't said anything about what the roads are like.

DH cycles most of the way with DS daily (DS now in yr8, country lanes, 6 miles each way). We're easing up to him doing whole thing on his own, the danger is one busy a-road to cross.

I don't know how that compares with your situation. We are all confident cyclists. Shame that no adults can accompany your son & help him develop road sense.

@DarlingWithoutYou

I can't cycle with him as I have a disability and his dad lives too far away to do that. Wish I could though.

Can you hire a teenager/student babysitter to cycle with him for his first few weeks or the whole first term if need be? Maybe even an older kid from the same school?

What are the roads like?
If the roads were high risk I would just drive or find alternative to driving (drive part way and walk the rest etc). But then I hate cycling on roads.

If they’re fairly safe roads I would aim to use the time before secondary to get him confident. Maybe get him to do bikes rides to different olcesa a couple of times a week.

Is there a friend he could cycle with? If not can you put something out on social media to see if there will be another child cycling part/all the same route?

That's difficult. He does need to cycle regularly between now and then if the plan is going to work. Can you rope in friends to help? Are there any bike clubs locally that might be able to lend a hand (cycle shops should be able to put you in contact)? Contact your local council - even if there isn't a bikeability course running locally at the moment, they may be able to help on a one to one basis. In our LA they would do the actual route with him and give him some individual coaching.
Without a doubt though, he needs to be wearing high vis and have day time lights (the kind that flash), if he is cycling on the roads in rush hour. You need to make sure that those things are non-negotiable, especially if he is still a bit wobbly.

There will be cycling training opportunities over the summer.

I'd still work on building up his confidence through the summer and early autumn rather than launching into it in January the hardest, and most hazardous time of year.

Maybe set him a challenge of cycling to particular spots and meet him at the waypoints so he has check-ins with you that you find accessible.

If it's a 20 minute cycle, that suggests an hour's walk - would that be feasible?

Once knew a very protective grandmother who drove behind her grandson (who wanted to cycle to school). She drove down the middle of the (very rural) roads so no one could overtake and I’m pretty sure anyone coming in the opposite direction would have had to mount the verge.

Thanks everyone for the advice. I think the best thing to do is teach him the route in chunks, and I'll drive to each 'stop point' and get him to bike to there. It's so worrying for me.

His school should be offering bikeability in year 6 - like right now. It's free, all schools should arrange it.

(and they can't say no "because of covid" because my son's old school is offering it I've seen all the kids out doing it)

But if they haven't then see if there's scope to do it privately over the summer. I noticed how good my son's cycling was after he did his (and he also did level 3 in secondary).

If you can't cycle with him then I would suggest finding a student to cycle with him. Once he's happy he can go alone, which will probably fit in nicely with when they go back to uni. If you say what county you are in someone might have an 18 year old handy ;)

His school aren't doing bikeability, I asked about it last year, they never do it. I emailed the council to ask about doing it privately but they said they are not running at present and that there need to be groups of 10 kids to make it work.

I'm in Herts!