Ex not interested in pregnancy

[Cm1988]

I am approximately six weeks pregnant.
My ex partner is the father, he was verbally and emotionally abusive.

I was no angel. I was abusing excessive amounts of cannabis to cope. I left him and gave everything up.

I have been excited to tell him, but he has blocked my number. I called him from a withheld number, I said 'I'm pregnant' - I don't know if he heard me or not, but he hung up regardless.

I'm fighting a losing battle here aren't I?

Do I have any rights at all to financial support when the baby is born? I don't think I do.

I'm living with my parents, as I left my ex partner in a bit of a hurry, so I am not alone.

Yes you do have rights to financial support from him, contact the CMS when baby is born. Be aware he'll likely fight it and demand a DNA test etc and if he wants to play nasty he may report your drug problem, though your midwife will likely refer you to services for support with that when you disclose it at your booking appointment anyway

Thank you for your response . I already referred myself to a program where I live about cannabis, so can prove I've had support and given up can prove it with blood tests etc. He really is quite nasty. I'm going to enjoy this pregnancy anyway, as I was told by doctors that I Could not conceive naturally due to low progesterone. I'm over the moon.

Why were you excited to tell him? It was a bad relationship and you’d already split up. I doubt this is good news for him.

If you want to be a single mum and have a supportive family and hopefully a stable income of your own then just forget about him and open a claim with the CMS when the baby is born.

He’s not going to be pleased. Few people would be. Not ideal circumstances to have a baby.

Since you didn’t think you could conceive were you not using contraception? It’s astounding how many women on here have shock pregnancies in bad circumstances having been told they’d never conceive.

The best thing to do is accept that he won't be around for the pregnancy. That's no bad thing either because abuse often starts, or escalates during pregnancy.

Don't make any further contact with him because that won't help you in any way, even more so while you are going through the drugs programme.

When the baby is born you can apply for maintenence. Don't try and get him to see or be involved with the baby, leave the ball in his court for contact.

I stopped consuming cannabis four weeks ago, I found out I was pregnant yesterday, and yes, I am excited to be a mother. Why not? Agreed, the circumstances aren't 'ideal', it doesn't mean that I can't love and care for another little human as much as you do, because you are in a perfect relationship.

I was reaching out for support, not cristism and judgement.

Thank you for the advice about not contacting him again from the above.

Being excited yourself is great! No one questions that. Being excited to tell your arsehole ex is quite another.

For get him until the baby is born and claim for child maintenance.

And congratulations!

It sounds like you’ve done all the right things since finding out you are pregnant which is great. Your midwife will also chat to you at your booking in appointment.

Once the baby has been born, you can claim CMS from the father. The amount you get will depend upon his income.

You have an abusive man as a father. He may well.demand access when baby is born.

Do the freedom program . You are entitled to maintenance. Whilst he legally should pay maintenance- he may seek contact if you do.

You sound a little naive OP. I'd use the upcoming months to really wise up to what's happening. Take a parenting course as well as the drug program as having a baby is a wonderful thing but a huge life changing big deal.

Well done on quitting the weed and for getting out. Forget him, concentrate on you and the baby.

6 weeks? Sweetie you might want to consider your options - you don't have to carry on with the pregnancy. You'll be tied to your abusive ex FOR EVER (well for the next 18 years as a minimum which will feel like forever!)