Friend’s funeral today and not heard from DP. AIBU?

[Sadnesshal]

Just that really. They weren’t a hugely close friend but DP knows I was affected by their passing and I was invited to the limited number of people at the funeral. I hadn’t seen them in a good couple of years. Just saying this for context.

Last night when we text he said hope you are ok and tomorrow goes ok, make sure you look after yourself and don’t rush back to work, take some time.

Today...I’ve not heard from him. Am I being unfair to feel hurt by this? He’s working a shift tonight but he’s been on WhatsApp and will have had a minute to send a quick message.

I don’t want to play games with him and I’m aware I could just text him but I feel so sad not to have heard from him I’m not even sure what I’d say at this point. We are usually in contact by text at least daily and a phone call once or twice a week too.

Given that he sent what sounds like a kind and thoughtful message yesterday, I wouldn't take this too much to heart, especially since you say he's been at work this evening. I'm sure you're feeling particularly sensitive after a sad day. Sorry for the loss of your friend.

Thanks @YouLookSoCool that’s a good point. I guess I just wanted some extra kindness from him tonight. But you’re right he did address it yesterday

Have you messaged him? From his very kind message beforehand I'd think he's not wanting to interrupt your day and is waiting to hear from you first.

I messaged him back last night @BooGhoosty haven’t messaged today

Maybe he didn't want to risk your phone going off at the funeral and the wake. Maybe he was letting your mourn with others at the funeral.
Why don't you text him and let him know how the day went

@HalzTangz he will know im home by now. Have been for ages. I think it’s odd he’s not bothered to text but maybe I’m being a bit of a princess!!

I think it's odd, and I don't think you are being a princess - I would text a good friend if I knew they were attending a funeral that day, and definitely a partner. Just basic human kindness to show you care surely?

Does he know you're home? He might just be waiting for you to say you're home.

I think you’re overthinking it. It sounds as if he is giving you some space. He sent you a lovely message yesterday so why would things be any different today?

Sounds like you need some reassurance of something but if you feel sad which is of course understandable why don't you just reach out - he is DP after all, let it go and give him a call. No point wondering and getting frustrated, just reach out would be what I would do.

I’m just surprised he’s not been in touch really. Not a hope you’re ok text or goodnight message.

If he's not normally an insensitive bastard is assume he's left it for you to contact him today in case you stayed late, went back to another friends house etc and he didn't want to interrupt

If he hadn't messaged the night before I'd say it wasn't good.

But I would think that he sent you a thoughtful message in advance and then wanted to give you some space today.

Hope you're doing ok, it's awful to lose a friend and it can be a real shock.

@HalzTangz

Maybe he didn't want to risk your phone going off at the funeral and the wake. Maybe he was letting your mourn with others at the funeral. Why don't you text him and let him know how the day went

I agree with this.

So sorry about your friend