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If you've been in a long term relationship is going off your DP common?

2 replies

pryggh · 01/06/2021 09:53

Ive been with dp for 14 years. We have 3 kids and been through a few tough times but have always come through.
I don't know how to explain it but over the last few years I'm kind of going off him. I find myself being massively irritated by him. Things that I sort of ignored before, now I notice every single time. Its not so much what he does, it's more his personality. I think I don't find him as attractive as a person anymore. What I'd like in a partner, the qualities he doesn't have. He's never had them. He's not changed at all. When we first started dating I obviously knew this but I sort of ignored it / didn't mind it and now it bothers me massively.
I haven't been in a long term relationship prior to this so don't know if this is a thing. Is it something that's common? Has anyone else experienced similar?

OP posts:
Checkingout811 · 01/06/2021 09:54

Hi OP.
Very similar here; been together 14 years and 3 DC but no, I don’t feel like this.

If you don’t find him attractive and don’t like him as a person / share values, maybe this isn’t right for you?

peridito · 01/06/2021 11:21

I'm sure it's not an inevitable consequence of being with someone long term .

Sounds like you made an error getting together. Sympathies ,it's tough .

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