Why is no-one saying it's wrong?

[Savannahannah]

Fran is the party host, the one who plans everything and everyone always has a good time. She has the perfect life all over social media but it's all a lie, all she does it talk behind everyone's backs and plays everyone off against eachother, she has a real nasty tendency.
Me and Fran are no longer friends because I can't be around her shit, she's just a liar and she just talks shit about everyone, so I called her out.. now I'm the bad guy? I've been there for Fran through tough times more than anyone but the way she's making our mutual friends treat me is disgusting, she's purposely got closer to our mutual friends so I'm alone. Girls she doesn't like have now taken the place of me. Our mutual friends and her family have stopped acknowledging anything I do or even a simple happy birthday. My 2 best friends are still pally with her & actually tell her when anything's planned so she "doesn't see it in social media and feel like shit" but all I ever do is find out they've been together via social media cos no-one ever saves my feelings. My 2 best friends don't think there's anything wrong and are quite alright with her being so nasty and making me feel this way.. how can everyone be so horrible? We're all 27 btw so hardly teenagers! Feel so alone it's horrible

@JustJoinedRightNow I don't think it'll ever change, she's always got things her way but she's very vulnerable deep down but doesn't allow it to come out so builds this fake life and fake friendships, she's just a nasty girl.. I don't think anyone will join my tribe as my tribe will be long gone! I'm not waiting for people to decide to be my friend, she can win them all, only half arsed shitty friends anyway x

Unfortunately your friends have there own agency. She can't force them to act in a certain way, they are adults, they are responsible for their own behaviour.

@UhtredRagnarson

the way she's making our mutual friends treat me is disgusting

They’re adults. They’re responsible for their own behaviour. If they are treating you in a disgusting way it’s because they want to. They aren’t nice people and they shouldn’t be people you want to call friends.

Exactly this. She’s not making them do anything- they’ve chosen to themselves. You need new friends.

@UhtredRagnarson

the way she's making our mutual friends treat me is disgusting

They’re adults. They’re responsible for their own behaviour. If they are treating you in a disgusting way it’s because they want to. They aren’t nice people and they shouldn’t be people you want to call friends.

This. You’re not kids at school any more. It’s time to unfriend some people on social media and find some new friends. Life moves on and it looks like you have outgrown these immature ‘friends’. It’s difficult at first... but soon you will look back and wonder why it took you so long.

Unless Fran has a gun to their heads, they are behaving this way because they want to.

Walk away. Find friends who won't throw you under a bus to win approval from a bully.

[quote Savannahannah]@Flowers500 these 2 have been my best friends since birth.. we really couldn't be any closer. These people also call her rotten behind her back but whenever she feels a bit rubbish they're the first people to be up her arse. These same people that told me it was nothing to do with them and it wouldn't change mine and their friendship & that it 'wasn't their argument' and have told me we're good.. all now turn their backs. If you think that's nice behaviour that Fran has turned people against me, because she did the same thing to us when she fell out with someone else "so I'm not friends with her so that means we're not friends with her" then fuck me, I must be the problem! [/quote]
You appear to be blaming 'Fran' because otherwise you'd have to hold your two best friends from birth, to whom you couldn't be closer, responsible for the fact that they've behaved badly towards you of their own free will.

The unfortunate reality is that Fran didn't make them do anything at gunpoint.

Op, do you need to work on your self esteem? I did around this time, and I realised that I didn't want a part of being in her orbit any more because (a) I was entitled to move on and (b) I was worth more.

From your subsequent comments I doubt your friendships with your mutual friends will survive, and do you know what, you're worth more. Don't let them.get away with treating you this badly. You are worth more.

Stop feeding the beast, stop talking to your friends about her, if they bring her up simply smile, nod and change the subject, or even better, tell them you'd rather not talk about her. Come off social media.

I also agree with everything @Bananarice said. Get new friends, take up hobbies and take yourself away from the drama.

Just because they are friends you've known for a long time, doesn't make them good friends

[quote Savannahannah]@JustJoinedRightNow I don't think it'll ever change, she's always got things her way but she's very vulnerable deep down but doesn't allow it to come out so builds this fake life and fake friendships, she's just a nasty girl.. I don't think anyone will join my tribe as my tribe will be long gone! I'm not waiting for people to decide to be my friend, she can win them all, only half arsed shitty friends anyway x[/quote]
That’s the right attitude OP, you will be long gone, moved right on from all this childish nonsense, and the next person in her group will have it happen to them. They’ll realise you were right, and it’ll just keep happening on a cycle. The Frans of the world don’t change. But we can become better at recognizing them and steering well clear.
Good luck! Stay strong!

Just decide who you want to be friends with and ditch the rest. Time for making new friends.